I'm a man but also a boy.
I'm mature but childish.
I'm stupid while being quick witted, a fat man with the confidence of one perfectly fitted.
The rebel fronting as a prep.
The smile covering the fear of death.
The frown covering the happiness of life while my shadow can eclipse the universe of all light.

I'm free now but more trapped than ever.
It's ended, gone and over.
My heart is crushed, beaten and slower.
Four years of hard work commitment and pain, my skin showing those scars to show my shame.

I'm a liar, a badman, I'm to blame.
I try to much or to little its never the same.
How can I ignore them when every year I have to write, speak, and hear their name.
I will never understand how our strength turned me lame forcing me to learn that the fight of my life was a game with nothing to gain.

I'm a man....but sometimes I feel like nothing.
Shattered dreams of feeling love and a part of something.
How do you go from the loves of each others lives to feeling nothing but sadness and resent inside.

I'm a loveless romantic.
All the tricks I know love I can show but all I ever get is we are done and you can go.

I feel so used.
My soul is abused.
I knew everything when I was with her... now I'm scared and confused.

I'm the one who was trying to make it work.
I'm the one who is shedding tears and being hurt.
How come I'm the one who feels cursed?
Always came second never came first.
Maybe this is the time I'm giving up the search.