I thought he loved me,
even when he would hit me,
because I still loved him.
I want it back,
even with the bad.
I miss how he held me close.
I miss him fixing my problems.
I need him, to fix me again.
but he is gone,
because he left me,
I'm untouchable to others in the acts like love,
I'm a wreck since he packed up his bags and just left,
I'm scared to have anyone else to love me like that.
because he took away my innocence I barely had grown to know,
I never had the time to be acquainted to my purity for he stole it,
It taken from me at age fifteen,
before I consented to love someone in that physical way,
before I knew he didn't really love me,
But he did love me. right?
that's what he had told me,
but I was made to believe a string of lies,
and when they finally un-twined,
I was left alone to wipe the tears from my eyes.
and I wonder still how it all got so bad,
How it all collapsed around me.
and it hurts to assess and see,
how he probably will be the only man to ever of loved me,
How he and I can't go back,
how I want it back,
How I hope for his phone call back,
but he never phones,
he never texts or writes,
he left me to wait for his return.
because I can only ever hope for it.
because I don't know how to continue my life.
He will never come back to me,
and I will never love someone the same,
and he will always be lingering in my head,
until I pick up the phone,
to his overdue call.
but until then,
I can only ever imagine what would have been,
if we continued together further into life,
but for now,
I'm stuck without him.