I take a deep breath in, full of nicotine and safety blankets.
I know it's killing me slowly, but the relief comes fast.
And like the laughter of family at a Christmas banquet,
or the sound of my song on the radio as I drive to work,
it's just that little extra shove; that tiny smirk;
I don't need to feed the habit; I don't need it to last.

So, if you see me hugging my ethereal comfort food to my lips,
Don't condescend to give me ****
for the puff that I take, for the way that I self medicate.
It's a moment's release from a lifetime of hates.
I take a deep breath in, full of nicotine and safety blankets,
and briefly the pain, like the smoke, dissipates.