please pick one
love me
or break my heart completely
drive me out of my own head
or hold me tightly in your bed
my only love
the truth I kept
as I lay in my bed
and wept and wept
I feel the cracks in my heart
as they open and shut
please
I can't even rhyme anymore
please stop hurting me
I love you
I love you
I love you

sometimes i wish that
i could drown the sun or
stomp it right out of the sky

but i can't stand to hurt the moon like that
and i couldn't if i tried

I can't stop the hurting by hurting.
at least,
not with cuts nor burns these days.
because I will pay if there are scars that stay.
but at least no one notices
just how much I weigh.

spent a birthday,
and a new year too,
in a cold and unexciting psych ward.
(I'd been there so many times
it was really nothing new.)

I had so much free time.
I had nothing much to do.
I opened up a game on their computer
and laughed:
I was still save game slot number 2.

i am sorry
for being afraid
to look you in the eye

when i know
just as well
the fear
of being forgotten

kisses with air blown out like toxic gas from poisonous plants set aflame;
he burns me slowly.
and I take it in,
feeling it like rays of sunshine
beaming softly on my skin.

my mouth tasted of rust,
of blood,
from the acid that washed over my tongue.
kiss me more.
it doesn't hurt, my love, I swear.
(but truth be told, everything hurts,
so with what do I compare?)

my baby exists when he wants to
leaving vitamin D outside my door
gives me kisses on my arteries
kisses my bruises even more

my baby gives flowers for breakfast
and claims they won’t ever bloom
he loves me, he loves me not
he speaks in glances across the room

my baby breaks my heart
my baby adores me so
my baby knows just the right spot
gotta let my baby go