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She slipped away with no goodbye
No parting gasp or widened eye
One heartbeat she was here, then she was gone.

I didn’t know it was the day
When she would gently drift away-
The nurses said that time was down the road.

For many hours I’d held her  hand
And when I could no longer stand
I sat nearby to read a magazine.

I cannot say with certainty
The moment that her soul leapt free
I feel ashamed and live with secret guilt.

I never should have touched that book
It robbed me of a final look
That might have told me she was on her way.

I had to wait til Laura came
And here her call my Mother’s name
And cry out, O my God - I think she’s gone.

I tell myself it was Mom’s will
To slip away when all was still
But yet I should have stood there at her side.

I might have sensed her spirit’s flight
Or seen some otherworldly light
Instead I idly looked at wedding gowns,

I feel I didn’t make the grade
And ever since that time I’ve prayed
That she’ll forgive the lapse and love me still.

Wherever she is dancing now
I hope she realizes how
My love is wrapped around her like a crown.

And as she starts eternity
With body new and spirit free
I hope she knows her heart lives on in me.

I think about her all the while
Sometimes with tear-sometimes with smile
But she walks closer by me than before.
  
The wisdom that she shared with me-
The training in the way to be
Are part and parcel of my very soul.

I’ll always be a part of her
Through any change that may occur
My love and fond remembrance will not fade.

So though she left without goodbye
To claim her mansion in the sky
I know she’ll save a corner there for me.

And come that future afternoon
Maybe distant, maybe soon,
I’ll hold her hand in greeting, not farewell.

And she will say she overlooked
My sitting down with bridal book
And that she knows I did the best I could.

She knew the measure of my love
And as she joined the realms above
Considered me to be her good girl still.

Then all the pain I’ve hid inside
Will disappear and I can glide
Into my own eternity at peace.          
                ljm
I wrote this in 1998 when my Mother died.  Didn't post it because of its length.
 Dec 2024 Pax
Joshua Phelps
Step one,
Get in their
Head,

Make them
Believe love
Is real

Before you
Leave them
For dead.

Step two,

Love isn't
What you
Need.

So you cast
Them aside,

Only looking
Out for yourself
And failing to see:

Nothing's
Permanent.

Toss and turn,
Watch it burn

Because
Coffins aren't
Just for the dead

Lay them down,
Lock them in,

Because
Broken hearts

Never win.
I'll never believe in love again after this.
 Dec 2024 Pax
Peter Gerstenmaier
After years of
Constant self-abuse
I've finally reached
My breaking point
And I don't think
Superglue will
Do this time
Congrats Peter, you've done it...
 Dec 2024 Pax
Liana
My therapist told me
That you said
You wanted to be friends

She didn't understand how messed up that was

I don't want to be his friend
I don't need my father as a friend
I need him as a parent
And a good one at that

You choose your friends
I don't choose you

You're forced to be someone's child
Like I was to you
Except you want to be my friend
I don't want you

My mom had an escape
She divorced him
And even then
It took her a child
And 25 years

I'm stuck
He's in my bones
There's nothing I can do
Except choose not to be friends with him

I want to be his daughter
And for that he has to be my dad
Thats on him

Step one:
Be an adult

*Failed
He's in too many of my poems too

(This note was written by a blade of grass who dreams to be the sun)
 Dec 2024 Pax
Neville Johnson
Tipsy
 Dec 2024 Pax
Neville Johnson
I get tipsy when I’m around you
I always feel that way
My heart is palpitating
My thoughts await
What shall I say?
For I’m in love
But you don’t know
It’s always been that way
That’s why I get tipsy
I just wish you’d stay
And just sit a while
Before the fireplace with hot chocolate
I’d try to say I’m amusing things
Get you to laugh and say yay
I’ve been working up my courage
For the last two months or so
Today, I think I’ll make my play
With a heidi heidi **
I’ll smother you with compliments
Each one of them sincere
I’ll ply you with fun anecdotes
I’ll make it very clear
That I am in love with you
There’s no place else for me to go
Except to be near you
To be with you
To make it so
 Dec 2024 Pax
Nobody
break
 Dec 2024 Pax
Nobody
i can't pick up the pieces
every time you break
i have my own
to retrieve from the floor
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