Yesterday I saw George crossing the street
In the high summer heat
We were walking in opposite directions
A series of random connections
If I didn't make my train in time
If the hill leading to the station was an easier climb
If I hadn't stopped at the vending machine
To quench my thirst for caffeine
Then our paths wouldn't have crossed that day
Its something I struggle to convey
A moment so fleeting
A seemingly random meeting

Sometimes when I try to force a poem, nothing happens.
But in the moment before I fall asleep
In the swirl of commotion that consumes my mind
Pops in that perfect line that was just
Out of reach
Then the flood gates open
My mind is awash with line after line
It goes as quickly as it arrives
If I don't get them on paper quick enough, they start to decay
That's why I keep a notebook next to my bed
Often when i read it in the morning it doesn't sound like me

I don't regret my choice
I regret what i let slip by
I regret ignoring that voice
I regret saying good-bye.

I will miss you.
You looked so sad that day.
You said the words we both knew
Things i was afraid you'd say

As the words fell flat.
we gazed at each other with sad eyes
and that was that
I slowly walk away gazing at the blue blue sky.

When I digest poems
I often regurgitate them
It's like throwing up
Alphabet soup
The letters
Are in a different order
Coming up
Than going down
After they've been
Saturated
In my juices
They become mine

We're drifting apart
Slowly but surely
Snipping the strings of the heart
I'm not speaking prematurely
I feel it in the words you speak
In the way you kiss
You're losing your mystique
I know something is amiss
The light that once lit up your face is fading
Sometimes it feels like talking to a stranger
Where I once felt at home, I now feel like I'm invading
I feel like I'm living in constant danger
At any moment you may deal the final blow
I don't want it to end
I want to continue to grow
And you will insist on still being my friend
Whatever the hell that means
Still the same messy end
I'm tearing at the seams
With the immanent evasion  
Awkward mono-syllable conversations
Just the balancing of the equations
The beginning and the end of relations

A solider walked into town
As the sun sank down
Into the deep blue of the ocean
There was a charge of emotion
That you could almost see in the air
As all of the villagers stared
It had been twenty long years
But those who remembered, remembered their fears
From that long and terrible night
When the rebels fought a ****** fight
And this man led the opposition
Who made the decision
To **** all who were involved
Before rebellion spread and evolved
It was a foot note in imperial history
And the commander was a mystery
After the promotions, he suddenly retired
Unable to comprehend what had transpired
Now after twenty years he had returned
Older, wiser, and more learned
He went to each family and begged for forgiveness

Clothes sticking to our skin
Hearts drenched with sin
The flies buzzed in my ears
A wrench thrown in the gears
Your eyes glisten with LoveLust
And we displace the dust
Lingering in our old hotel room
I watch your eyes bloom
Old memories of the distant past
I wonder how long it can last
Replaying scenes from an old flick

Its a rainy Tuesday afternoon
And the sun disappeared way too soon
Watching ****** Tuesday afternoon TV
Sipping some weirdly named herbal tea
I hear my knocking
I start walking
I open the door; your standing there
I try to remember how to properly breathe air
You look like you always do
Your eyes that peculiar blue hue
The color of the sea right after rainfall
******* it all
You got a box in your hand
I understand
I take the box and throw it inside
You follow me in and I can't hide
We sit and adjacent chairs
The floor is the recipient of my dead stares
My full name passes your lips
Like a specter slithering from the crypts
Memories rush back
A sudden panic attack
For an instant we lock eyes
I see past your disguise
I see a stranger
It puts my sanity in danger
I thought I knew you
What was false, what was true
What was right, what was wrong
Was this you all along
I loved you before
But now I'm going to show you the door
Out of my house and out of my life

I guess someone fixed this door
It used to creak a lot more
The interior is wearing a coat of dust
The metal ceiling fans are starting to rust
Times decaying powers are working full force
They throw me way off course
No longer submerged deep in the past
Reality hits me hard and fast
This was, at one point, my living room
Memories,like weeds, start to bloom
Dad(If he was home) was always drinking
My little sister never had an inkling
Mom was always working
But the bills were always lurking
Soon there was a lot less food
And it didn't help the mood
When dad just went off like a bomb
And just went after mom
I remember vividly the day
That child services took us away
Dad wasn't home and Mom was in tears
And in her eyes I saw her worst fears
I stand in that room till i can't anymore
Then for one final time I head for the door

Where the sky kisses the sea
Where the waves crash endlessly on the shore
That is where i will be
When i slam shut the door
To cancel out all the noise
Just to listen to the breath of the ocean
To absorb natures little joys
To escape from the senseless commotion
The smell of sea salt
The sand hot beneath my feet
My minds distractions come to a halt
Oh and is it so sweet

The torrential downpour slammed against the ship
The helmsman is losing his grip
The sails are in shambles
The captain has been reduced to rambles
The storm shows no sign of slowing
And that feeling in my stomach is rapidly growing
We are going to sink
Salty water is going to be my last drink
Thor's hammer strikes above
Only pure unadulterated fear
With my death so near
I gaze back into the past
Savoring every memory while it lasts
I look at it sweetly through rose tinted glass
I smile softly to myself as all things must pass
The water grabs me in an ice cold embrace
And I die with grace and a smile on my face
Through death i know what it means to live
All the pleasure and horrors it can give
So don't throw it away
Use and abuse everyday

We trace back our origins
As we breath in the toxic halogens
Time and space are deteriorating rapidly
And I’m losing all sense of me
Everything’s becoming intertwined
Nothing is easily defined
The lines are blurred
I do not know what has or has not occurred
I experience past present and future as one instance
My mind offers no resistance
I have become a conduit for all creation
Through that I have found salvation

Sometimes in the depths of the silence
From the back of my tiny shack
I can hear your laughter
Ever since I boarded that train
To travel out west to the territories
Every cell in your body has changed
You've become a different person  
When I read your replies
I don't hear your voice
I constantly look at your photo
To remind myself
What you look like
And why I am here
But I'm starting to feel the strain
Of the three thousand miles
That are between us
I long for the day
When instead of paper and ink
You will be flesh and blood
When you're no longer just words on a page
And I can hear your laugh again

I think with half empty words
They strike clashing minor chords
They bounce and resonate in my head
With all the lies i have been fed
By people close and far
These things start to scar

The stars were out in full force
They were my only source
Of light.
Because tonight
Its just me
Alone, by the sea.
Writing secrets in the sand
Things that no one would understand.
They always get reclaimed by the water
And like a knowing mother comforting a daughter
I always feel like a weight has been lifted.

It was pitch black
I couldn't see a thing
But theres was no going back
Because I don't know what the future will bring
But I know that the past is aiming to ****
So I take one step into the unknown
I take it by pure force of will
Because the future is only set in stone
If you remain fixed in the past
Everything is always changing
Each day different from the last
Your fate, always rearranging
The past is past but the future is self determined

We were walking down the street
Following the winding trail of concrete
Wandering in the summer rain
Experiencing the majestic and the mundane
Our clothes soaked clean through
And I looked over at you
And you had ear buds in your hand
And you asked if I had anything planned
I said no
You said we should go
We found a park and sat underneath a tree
And you looked over at me
We had an ear bud in each ear
We turned it up so we could hear
We sang loudly and proudly
Until it was no longer cloudy

Mismatched rambling lines
All going with the times
The random erratic flow
The constant stop and go
All signs point outward
From a single point we are moving backward and forward
Too long have we been condensed
Like sheep herded fed and fenced
It is time to run,time to fly
Knock down the fence or die
And spread out into the open field
Though no one knows what it will yield
The sheep will over come the herder
They will not get away with ******
Wake up from your sleep
Though it is lovely and deep
Awaken and see that the world is burning
And the herder doesn't find it concerning.

I take a hot long shower
At this odd hour
The sun is long set
As i get soaking wet
The water washes away the dirt
And with it all the hurt
My muscles relax and my brain sighs
In here i sever all ties
The constant sound of water against tiles
So many long miles

Alcohol pulsing in her veins
Dancing in sweet August rains
Hair flowing down her back
Wild as a cub about to attack
I take a swig from the bottle, all bitter and sweet
It makes me feel a little more complete
Drenched clothes sticking to our skin
I couldn't help but grin
She's got that look in her eyes
Like a hundred thousand fireflies
She pounces,teeth jokingly bared
She lands on me, I'm totally unprepared
I stare into twin green lights
part of me dies, part of me sighs, part of me delights
Her lips find mine in the dark
And I swear there was a spark
An emotional/electrical discharge
Her eyes enlarge
Like biolumincent spheres
The water and ***** wash away our fears
She giggles like a babbling stream
Its a hazy dream
Fingertips in the notches in her spine
Her mouth moves with mine
Alone with ourselves, the ***** and the rain
Our bodies sing the same old refrain
In the morning we experience a sitcom reset
We both pretend to forget

Clouds bounce against the edges of the sky
I let out a long sigh
My breath visible in the frigid air
I'm shaking but I don't care
The sky is a deep after snow blue
A lone bird came into view
The world was perfectly still
I couldn't move; I didn't have the will
To break this instant of perfection
To sever this connection

Its a rainy afternoon in May
Its a slow slow day
The droplets weave a song as they fall upon the glass
I wonder when it will pass
Maybe it won't. Maybe it will just keep raining
Unrelenting and forever maintaining
I venture outdoors
Into everlasting downpours
I am drenched
I am entrenched
In the feeling
That rain is healing
And both concealing and revealing
To enshroud yourself in a cloak of rain
Is a way to keep sane
To feel alone and completely together at the same time
To wash away all the grime
The nature of rain is to be cleansing

Everyone is talking small
Whats on T.V. and sales at the mall
Their words pester you like flies
Which girls like which guys
Its an endless flow of *******
An ever deepening pit
Reality shows, tabloids and radio
Make us malleable as play-doh
See through the illusion
And reach the same conclusion

There's the constant rhythm of raindrops
and you're staring out the window
Watching that one guy at the bus stop
and all rushing people down below.
You don't even look in my direction
As your name fills the air
But I can see your reflection
You might know that i'm there.
your body rises and falls with every breath
as your green eyes try to capture the scene
Like a camera, but with more depth
it takes time to develop, to understand what it means

The colors flared
Everything became brighter
The sunlight glared
It all became tighter
Words flowed out like wine
Time slowed to a halt
Your eyes shined that familiar shine
I took a snapshot and stored it in my vault
Your voice rises and falls
It stops being words
It breaks down those walls
And becomes lovely chords
Turning into pure sound
It paints a smile on my face
We laugh like no one is around
And i never want to leave this place
In this moment, this everlasting minute
All of life's beauties refined
To the limit
My reality defined

We stand upon the wall
Burning fields and bleeding skies
We all headed the call
We marched to our demise
Whispers of our last kiss
Play like ghosts on our lips
We all think and reminisce 
The fabric of reality rips
The lines are getting blurry
Past and present merge
Madness has an ungodly fury

We all have puppet strings
They hold us together
They are those certain things
Delicate as a feather

We are simply actors on a stage
Actors come and go
Everyone is on a different page
its the never ending show

We perform for those we can never see
Just sit back and play your role
And  they see, they'll leave you be
Leaving you unaware and whole

Are we alone, acting in fear
Trying to follow everyone's rules
Is there an audience out there
Or is this be the stage full of fools?

The stars shined like highway flares
As they sent their invisible heat across the universe
They break the uniform darkness of the sky
And act as beacons for the lost and the weary
All was silent except for the rising tide
The endless lapping of waves against the shore
A subtle melody playing quietly in the distance
Far from your mind, but always there
The water reflected lights from the city and the sky
Like it was an imperfect mirror
Like it was a canvas for nature to paint
Shimmering and shining; constantly in motion
You could never see the same patch of water twice  
The smell of fresh bread wafted through the air
As the baker started making the morning supply
It mingled and mixed with the smell of the salt
The perfume of the city started to develop
A unique mixture that could not be duplicated
It was all nature and man interacting
Weaving a beautiful symphony
Melody and counter melody
The stars and the lights.

Daddy left home when i was five
Didn't know how i was going to survive
All he left was a post-it note
Telling us how he jumped the boat
Right of the deep end
We had nothing to defend
So we left. We headed west
Mom and i tried to make the best
Scrimping and saving every cent
Working where ever we went
And we made it.
We survived every blow and every hit
We rode out the storm
And now we are safe and warm
In a house of our own

Lost in the labyrinth of words
Cigarette carelessly perched
In between her fingers
Smoke rising and swaying
To the jazz
That made the room heavy
With deep contemplation
No one spoke
No one dared to break the silence
To disrupt the voyage
Into our own minds

I walk past the board
I take my seat among the  hoard
They feast their eyes on the substitute teacher
Wishing to torture her like a wild creature
She stands firm with determined eyes
Like god looking down from the skies
She speaks in a firm yet gentle voice
She makes it seems that we have some choice
We don't really but at least there's an illusion
The students come to a conclusion
To not give her total hell
They can tell
That she does not take ****
And we respect that a little bit

We watched the sunset
An everlasting flare sinking into the sea
we had just met
But it felt like an eternity
Since you stepped off that train
We spent the day walking the beach
Picking each others brains
Developing a flow of speech
We bought chocolate chip ice cream
watching the sun disapear into the rising tide
I saw your eyes gleam
Something clicked inside
On the seawall we sat only eight inches apart
But to me it felt like miles
Sometimes the hardest thing to do is to start
When faced with life's trials
But you made your move first
You sat right next to me and looked me in the eyes
Your eyes so green I thought they might burst
You kissed me then, under the burning skies

My body is running on fumes
My eyes feel heavy
Everything is sore but
But my mind still races
Racing on in circles
I contemplate all the problems that lay before me
I twist and turn and manipulate them
I consider every angle
But yet i end up with the same answer that i started with
Absolutely Nothing
I start to wonder about everything
Inflicting every wound of self doubt and self loathing i can think of.
I lie in this torture devise i call a bed while my mind turns on it self
I can not wait the sweet release of sleep
So that i can escape my army of ghosts
Dreams Sweet Dreams

You know every single word to every single song
And you always sing along
Each song is tied to a different memory
Everyone fits a moment just perfectly
You've listened to B-side and EP
And searched as far as the eye can see
For those rare releases only on cassette tape
And you always manage to scrape
Just enough money for when they're in town
And they've never let you down
Because when you've hit a dead-end
You know you can always depend
On them to turn you around
To help you find solid ground
To you its not just a song, an album or a band
Its a way to understand

There is a song burning in my brain
Like a feeling I can't contain
It defies any explanation
It breaks every limitation
It is a pure transmission
To me from the musician
I know every groove in the record
Every note of every chord
Every word of every verse
For better or for worse
This song has become apart of me

I'll tell you more than the truth demands
Of a land hidden in the sands
A city only spoken of in tongues long dead
Whose name will linger like a spector in your head
And I must confess
That you will obsess
For half a century
From my curse i shall never be free
I don't know what keeps me going
Even if i die without knowing
I know it's too late to turn back now
I wipe the sweat from my brow
As the heat strangles the air
My companions and i all stare
They've all been with me for years
As our hope slowly disappeared
Only our friendship remained
We stared at the sands until it became ingrained
deep within our brains
it fanned the old flames
one more try, one more excavation
I should have chosen a different occupation

I slept in my clothes
My sanity in its death throes
I throw back some whiskey
Makes me feel frisky
Cuts back the static
Demolishes the walls of this ******* attic
So silent I can hear my heart beating
My lucidity is thankfully fleeting
I dive into a world unseen
Not dreams nor reality, but something in between
Up here time has no meaning
The sun is no longer gleaming
Darkness clouds my mind
But I am free and unconfined
My issues scattered on the floor
Nothing less, nothing more

Her lips crack open and music spills out
All of it moving and beautiful without a doubt
Her deep voice is transcending
The notes wrap around me never ending
I feel the bass in the floor
The guitar seeps into my every pore
The whole is greater then the parts
I can feel the unifying beat of their hearts
The drinks shake in rhythm to the song
They sing of where they belong
What it means to be, and the things they've lost
They sing of how they got here and at what cost
All of this they express.
And i believe them.

Tiny beads of fine sand
Run laughing through my hand
Right here at the beach
With everything within reach
My shovel and pail
The ground so frail
The constant roar
The birds all soar
Sandwiches with a crunch
Always make a good lunch
Salt fresh in the air
Floating by a sand castle lair
Everything seems so right
Sleeping adults kids in fright
Of the advancing tide
Little ***** that try to hide
All the kids come for the day
they always want to stay
The calm whistle of the breeze
The ice cream that always seems to please
The laughter of children floats about
Its a happy place no doubt
Filled with beach towels and old books
To those secret rock nooks
The beach holds many mysteries
Each with its own history

You kissed me on the corner
Of Highland and North Central
A block away from my house
My eyes were closed
My stomach was tightening
The air was still
On that slow June day
That was just hot enough
To justify ice cream
I had walked over that spot
A thousand times before
Unaware of its purpose
I've walked over that spot
A thousand times afterwards
But now it has been transformed
Into a nerve ending
Independent of my body
Every time I step on that corner
On Highland and North Central
For better or for worse
Memories flood in unbidden
Fresh and as volatile
As that June day

It took a while to wake up today
My alarm went off before the sun had even risen
I kept delaying the inevitable by hitting the snooze button
But eventually I gave in and got out of bed
I bundled up, braced myself, and opened the door
Walking into the cold was like being submerged underwater
I could feel it trying to infiltrate every opening
It was slowly seeping through every layer of my clothes
I could feel it burning in my lungs
I could see it when I exhaled
It made the air seem quiet
And the sun seem dimmer
And in the dead of winter even time moved slower
The trees had long ago lost their leaves
And now the bare branches
Stretched upwards into predawn light
Like a thousand skeletal limbs

Deep within the maze of bookshelves
Past the travel section and the nonfiction
Is the place where we can lose ourselves
And be free of all restrictions
I seek refuge in the realms of fantasy and sci-fi
Lands where monsters and magic reign supreme
And in the blink of an eye
I'm submerged in the authors dream
Where characters leap off the page
An assassin sharpens his sword
An usurper king seizes the crown
The armies face must the approaching horde
A hero must rise or the city will drown
And that's just the summary on the back!
Every book is portal to a new dimension
When the real world threatens to attack
Escape into a book, it relieves the tension

When she talks you can hear the smile
And she does it with such style
You watch from a distance
Your friends offer you assistance
But your too scared
And look a little impaired
So you wait till the fear goes away
and you can go make her day
Then that time has come
To stop looking so glum
You ask her out and she says yes
it was a success

Your eyes strain to see
A warm gun pointed at me
Darkness chokes the scene
You wonder what it all means
You see something in his eyes
A dark sea of lies
He seems so desperate so scared
A wild dog with his teeth bared
Money is hard to find
It alters your state of mind
He says he wants your purse
He spits out a curse
The words fall ******* the ground
Then there isn't a sound
You hesitate your eyes glued to the gun
It glimmer as bright as the sun
you toss the purse towards him
He shoves me towards you, it looked grim
He ran away into the night
That was quite the fright

The heat is coming down
Like a car playing chicken
Except all you can do is stand there and get hit
Over and over again
Until it merges with your skin, your body
It stays with you like a second skin
Like some sort of sickness
Water is your pain reliever
Air conditioning is but a temporary cure
Because as soon as you leave
The heat is right outside
Waiting for you.

Stare at the keys till the symbols blur
Till something wonderful can occur
The keys delight with every stroke
Something only typing can evoke
The clitter-clatter of the keys
Like a thousand buzzing bees
Pure flowing unadulterated phrases
Escaping my mind twisted mazes
I become unaware, detached
My mind has become unlatched
Oh it's so harmonic
So gloriously electronic
Man and machine
So flowing and clean

My words are delivered
To the shores of my mind
By The Veiled Lady
She comes to me in a rosewood boat
From a distant land
She speaks to me in tongues long dead
My mind goes blank
My heart discerns their meaning
And creates poetry

The photo is shot
The subject is killed, embalmed
Corpses on display
Moments entombed in amber
Preserved forever
Taken out of time
No past, no future
Only that one shining moment

The crowd follows the loud
The quiet silently riot
Deep in the chamber of dreams
The subconscious screams
Our freedoms oppressed
Our thoughts compressed
Staring down the barrel of a gun
There is no where to run
When your mind's a prison
They target you with deadly precision

Utter rejection
Fear injection
I'm about to quit
Tired of this *******
Completely demoralizing
Seemingly finalizing
Soul crushing
Emotions rushing
Fears evolving
This is all involving
Self reliant
Feeling defiant
**** the machine
They don't play clean
Utter manipulation
Choking creation
Do what they say
They can pay
It's depressing
It's distressing
Stand up, shout, scream
Don't be afraid to dream
Its insanity
A tribute to vanity
Shallow thinking
Heavy drinking
Try to escape
The intellectual ****
Someone will listen
And there eyes will glisten