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 Feb 2014 Özcan Mermaid
bc
Let me be your cigarette
I want you to hold me softly between your fingers
I want your smooth lips to work wonders upon my skin
I want you to breathe me in
I want to be the one to calm you when you're upset
I want to be the thing you live off of and feed off of
Let me be your cigarette, please
I want to feel needed because all my life I have been the second choice
Give me your love and affection
I want your adoration
I want your lips
I want the way your brown eyes light up when you smile
I want your little dimple that appears on the right side of your face when ever you smirk
I want the way you catch a football ever so gently between your hands
I want the way your laugh is so loud and contagious
I want the way that just your presence alone can make me feel amazing
I want you
I want all of you
Because I love you and you are everything to me
Even though I am nothing to you

-b.c.
It ***** loving someone who doesnt love you back.
And I
Was so stuck
On my own
Little
Problems
That I totally
Missed
That you were
Suicidal
Too.
 Jan 2014 Özcan Mermaid
Eliza
Young
 Jan 2014 Özcan Mermaid
Eliza
"Sometimes
being young
is less fun than
being dead."

*- Pump Up The Vol.
 Jan 2014 Özcan Mermaid
Eliza
It's not my fault
that sleep doesn't come to me easily,
that the thoughts in my mind will not leave me,
that it takes two hours before I drift off completely
(sometimes even three).

It's not my fault
that my hands and legs would not stop fidgeting,
that I find the littlest things very distracting,
(like how the clock never stops ticking)
that I like to keep repeating.

It's not my fault
that sometimes I can't breathe,
that I'm not the person who you would want to be with,
that sometimes I don't want to live.

It's not my fault that I have a condition.
Or maybe it is.

*(n.d.)
She fell in love with feeling pain.
She fell in love with being hurt.
She fell in love with wanting to let go.
She fell in love with sadness.
She fell in love with her tears.
She fell in love with her cuts, her bruises, her scars.
She fell in love with her razor.
She fell in love with broken promises.
She fell in love with lies.
She fell in love with heartbreak.
She fell in love with hopelessness.
She fell in love with incompetence.
She fell in love with crying.
She fell in love with ignorance.  
But most importantly, she fell in love with you.
*H.T
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