Anxiety
My head spins, my fingers become numb
The feeling of critters along my body
It's my nerves
Pain throbs within my temple
And my chest begins to tighten
I close my eyes and try not to panic
But I can't
My mind won't let me think positive
It won't let me calm myself down
The fear of life and everyone's ideas interrupts theses sad thoughts
Pins alongside my face
Nose as cold as ice
Twitching eye
Oh God, I m terrified
What is this?
Oh, another panic attack
Palpitations and bowel irritation
So why am I facing this?
See I once was arrogant because of my deeds
Until life brought me down to my knees
Where I'd beg and plead, to let these negative thoughts parish
Sitting in front of my husband embarrassed
That I can't hold my sanity together
Tears racing one another down the sides of my mahogany cheeks
As I struggle to speak
But it's all in my head
After all I can be a bit of a hypochondriac
I felt so lonely
like no one could help me
and if anyone knew, they would label me a nutcase
But through it, I will emerge and fight
Never give up and never lose
Especially not to
DEPRESSION

We must be on a shoot first ask questions later bases
Especially when you see black faces
Do you think we are all thugs on drugs, who mug for a living
Or all non working baby mammas on the warfare system
But when we bring up the question of our oppression
All of a sudden you start neglecting
Centuries of terror for murders in Chicago
Or fake statistics that leave remnants of non compassion to those who don't resemble our situation
This is blatant black chaos
I didn't feed it, I only admitted it exist
Hard truths die slowly but fast lies sink heavy
Burden left on the chests of the youth
Who get persecuted for standing in truth
So it looks to not appeal to the morale of those who are oppressive
But it wreaks through the souls on the receiving end
Now you want to hold hands in hopes to keep the power you murdered for
It is power you truly adore, you worked hard for it
But someone worked even harder
My ancestors built this country
And our youth will run this country
One day we won't see black chaos
Rather the faces of JUSTICE

It would be fun to party
Perhaps if there was no oppression
Maybe then I could lay back and relax
And run my hands through the sand without thoughts of a failing society
Of course I would love to travel and tell stories of my ventures
But I probably won't because I could honestly care less
I just want the world to be a little less chaotic
So that I can party

How do they realistically expect us to flee from the demanding stereotypes forcefully placed above our heads and in our hearts when they find satisfaction in the thrill of conquering our souls bleeding on the cold pavement?
-they don't. stop killing us, please.

I want to feel the nights breeze without interruption
Without feeling like I am prey
And being watched from afar
I want to hear the crickets chirp and the wind blow between my toes
I want to lurch into the deep waters of the ocean
And allow them to carry me away
So that I can feel that bit of Heaven on Earth
I want to retrieve the cloths I left by the ocean, covered in sand
I want to kiss you through the night
In the beautiful silhouette of street lights exploiting the beaches scenery
I want to be at ease and peace