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Dec 2016 · 248
Depression
Monique Lewis El Dec 2016
Anxiety
My head spins, my fingers become numb
The feeling of critters along my body
It's my nerves
Pain throbs within my temple
And my chest begins to tighten
I close my eyes and try not to panic
But I can't
My mind won't let me think positive
It won't let me calm myself down
The fear of life and everyone's ideas interrupts theses sad thoughts
Pins alongside my face
Nose as cold as ice
Twitching eye
Oh God, I m terrified
What is this?
Oh, another panic attack
Palpitations and bowel irritation
So why am I facing this?
See I once was arrogant because of my deeds
Until life brought me down to my knees
Where I'd beg and plead, to let these negative thoughts parish
Sitting in front of my husband embarrassed
That I can't hold my sanity together
Tears racing one another down the sides of my mahogany cheeks
As I struggle to speak
But it's all in my head
After all I can be a bit of a hypochondriac
I felt so lonely
like no one could help me
and if anyone knew, they would label me a nutcase
But through it, I will emerge and fight
Never give up and never lose
Especially not to
DEPRESSION
Sep 2016 · 269
Black Chaos
Monique Lewis El Sep 2016
We must be on a shoot first ask questions later bases
Especially when you see black faces
Do you think we are all thugs on drugs, who mug for a living
Or all non working baby mammas on the warfare system
But when we bring up the question of our oppression
All of a sudden you start neglecting
Centuries of terror for murders in Chicago
Or fake statistics that leave remnants of non compassion to those who don't resemble our situation
This is blatant black chaos
I didn't feed it, I only admitted it exist
Hard truths die slowly but fast lies sink heavy
Burden left on the chests of the youth
Who get persecuted for standing in truth
So it looks to not appeal to the morale of those who are oppressive
But it wreaks through the souls on the receiving end
Now you want to hold hands in hopes to keep the power you murdered for
It is power you truly adore, you worked hard for it
But someone worked even harder
My ancestors built this country
And our youth will run this country
One day we won't see black chaos
Rather the faces of JUSTICE
Aug 2016 · 388
Party
Monique Lewis El Aug 2016
It would be fun to party
Perhaps if there was no oppression
Maybe then I could lay back and relax
And run my hands through the sand without thoughts of a failing society
Of course I would love to travel and tell stories of my ventures
But I probably won't because I could honestly care less
I just want the world to be a little less chaotic
So that I can party
Aug 2016 · 239
I Won't Shut UP
Monique Lewis El Aug 2016
Many years of distrust and mustered up anger
This *** boils over as it leaks sin
So I am supposed to forget about it
You know, the great war everyone ignores
My lips are supposed to take a back seat because your ears cannot bare a burden my foremothers and forefathers dealt
So you cry that I complain because your fear won't compromise with your brain
No I won't shut up!
As long as people suffer and animals whither away lifeless
And injustice strikes the feet of every person on this plane
I won't loosen my lips
I'll grip my hips and stare into the souls of the soulless
I won't shut up, I won't back down

By Monique Lewis ©2016
Aug 2016 · 279
BE
Monique Lewis El Aug 2016
BE
I want to feel the nights breeze without interruption
Without feeling like I am prey
And being watched from afar
I want to hear the crickets chirp and the wind blow between my toes
I want to lurch into the deep waters of the ocean
And allow them to carry me away
So that I can feel that bit of Heaven on Earth
I want to retrieve the cloths I left by the ocean, covered in sand
I want to kiss you through the night
In the beautiful silhouette of street lights exploiting the beaches scenery
I want to be at ease and peace
Aug 2016 · 244
**READ THIS NOW**
Monique Lewis El Aug 2016
We have a platform called social, economic, and political relief
But we must listen and move forward ourselves
We've trusted those with no eyes to deviate paths for and from us
So we stand holding the bag of promises we never made them keep
I put you here, we put you here
So yes you should respond to our critical demands
Where are our policies as this ship slowly sinks
We stare at the bags of promises you gave us
Give them back!
We built this
But you want to tear it down because your ego has a mind of it's own
And this "constitutional republic" represents its self as a "democracy"
Yet clearly a "plutocracy" and "oligarchy"
Remember people.....
Stop letting promises that will never be sought get away
Its complete disgrace in the face of those civilized enough to know its implications
Lobby for and enforce justified statutes and laws by your own admission
READ THIS NOW
Do something
or something could be done to you
Aug 2016 · 195
Accept You
Monique Lewis El Aug 2016
I don't remember you
Well....
Sometimes
And every time I see you I question your intentions
I'm curious, because many people say you are the truth with-out doubt
So why do I doubt
Has a seal been placed over my heart
Or did you give me the ability to see what others have not
See, I don't know because I don't feel as bad as I once did
Because I started to do better when I left you
I huge weight was lifted off my shoulders
But now that I see you again, I feel like I have a place for you
I may chance you, but not for the trivial reasons I once had
Real religion

*By Monique Lewis ©2016
Aug 2016 · 278
Rise
Monique Lewis El Aug 2016
I martyred the sins of my foremothers and forefathers
Therefore rebirthed an allegiance to the all
Which I was innately apart of from the beginning
They rose and sunk
I sunk and too shall rise

*By Monique Lewis ©2016
Aug 2016 · 185
Spam
Monique Lewis El Aug 2016
It's amazing how I never subscribed to you
But you showed up in an unwarranted place
So now my face is still, as I have no choice to delete or keep
Ignoring the fact that you still remain in a place I never wanted you

*By Monique Lewis ©2016
Aug 2016 · 301
Welcome to AmeriCA
Monique Lewis El Aug 2016
Welcome to America
Land of the feeble, home of the slaves
Where foreigners parlay
Consuming fruits of the labor of ancestors faceless
Were caste systems stay in place
And concepts convict colors
Where fathers have no mothers, and mothers no lovers
To the place that everyone loves, so they can remove their gloves
Speak blasphemous contradictions, and victims get convicted
Where dictatorship is democracy and Democracy is hypocrisy
And the living dead transitions from box to box
Where the collective creative consciousness is mocked
And people’s minds are locked in solitary confinement
Where they stone your reputation when you idle worship
But they idol worship those they could never be
Where freedom aint free, very costly
And if you succeed you will bleed, the country’s sins
Everyone pretends with pretentious nature
Where people won’t share, or care about anything but their own self interest
A place where the black class places their children in the ground before themselves
Where poison is wealth and health is death in a needle
Where people are paid according to skin, where there are boys not men
And females not women to solidify a better position
Where miseducation poses as education rapes your pockets
And stills your eyes out of its socket
A place where no one trusts each other
And your best friend is your Glock
Where the media lies and deceives to protect its power
And little girls dress like their getting in the shower
A place where morals and values are exceedingly different
And your next door neighbor could be a hitman
But you’ll never know because that second face never shows
A place where majority means ruler and minority means peasant
But the peasants still don’t get the message
Where the greatest population don’t have a nationality
But beg and plead for mercy
There is none, it gets worst by the day
A melting ***, where all believe they should have their way, smiling in the face of disgrace
Welcome to the dressed up thugs who maintain plugs, and shrug, when they destroy lives
Where more people get mugshots and bullets than they do employment
A place where the creators are never recognized, but disguised, and many are disingenuous
Welcome to the land where the people gave up their rights and liberty
Because they’d rather watch tv
And be like people who have more resources
Where marriages have plundered under divorces
And people don’t say excuse me
Or help the elderly lady, they walk pass without a care in the world
Welcome to the good ole melting ***
That is now molten rock
Welcome to America

By Monique Lewis ©2016

— The End —