Who am I?
What am I?
I am a girl who can't ever be defined by few words

How do you define something you have never come across?
How do you define what you have came across, but don't know how to describe correctly?
And you can only describe it in a few words
The words aren't enough
It's a part of what I am
But not who I am
How do I define myself so I can fix myself?

Everyone is a mystery to themselves
I know what I do or don't like and what my intentions are
I'm sure everyone else does

But who am I?
What is my essence?

I thought I defined myself before
But those are only words that could change at any moment

I am still those words
But
I think there's more to me than just those few words

Who am I I ask
I say *I am myself

All these whispered thoughts inside my head
They hate me
I hate me
I'm fat
I'm shy, awkward, and quiet
I'm not beautiful either
Not like other girls
I'm different
I'm weird
I'll never be loved by any guy, even if I loved him
None of my dreams would seem to come true
I won't be the writer I want to be
I won't get married and have kids like I want to
And I'll go out like Juliet in Romeo and Juliet, but without my Romeo because he won't exist
Or I might drown my sorrows in my own blood and wine
Red wine
The blood of wines
I'll drink it down till I don't feel anything anymore, but warm tingles and numbness
I might fill up the bath and grab something to end my pain
But even that is a dream
And it won't come true
None of them do
I've seen better people fail
I'm no better
At least I don't believe I am
*This is what I think of me...

I have this very special treasure
A precious wealth for sure
Something that makes me feel loved and favored,
It’s the love of God I have adored.

He helps me in every task
Even though I do not ask,
He gives me knowledge and skills,
In return, I do obey His will.

But I know that it’s not just enough,
To surpass God’s unconditional love
Because nothing can still be compared
To all the things to me He shared.

From the beginning till forever,
His love I will always remember,
It is my one precious wealth
In my blessed life on Earth.

I decided to write a poem about you,
To express my feelings,
But as I put pen to paper,
I realised I didn't know what to write,
So I started reminiscing memories,
The way you smile when you look at me,
It's the kind of look you only see once in a lifetime,
And now I realise I don't want to share any of our other memories
Because a smile of yours is enough
To write a whole poem about