I got too attached to seconds
where the sun bathed in the feelings
of a moment one would dream
to catch with bare hands—
not knowing my feet maims my body
every time I spell back
all the words I used to say to you
until I'm paralyzed
by a time I should forget.

I try to find art in a picture of the future—
but my fingers keep on tracing
each one of my past paintings,
thinking about how beautiful it was
when I colored them wild and free.

the feelings were an adversary
when I saw what the world spoke,
but emotions caved in
once everything's been told
by your eyes and those painting kiss.
right there and then is when I knew
why I was so intricate in what I said—
I didn't want them to know me
the way I know you. still.

your hum is still playing
in my apartment like you're the voice
of this living room.
I couldn't hold the walls
and I still am trying to;
guilt is what I taste every time
I try to let go— my lips
can't stop spewing our memories
on every candle I blow
because you're not here
and I'm not ready to let it go.

every line that I say would be the words
of the man they wanted to see,
hung on the wall in a golden frame.
I was on the edge of the precipice—
but it was you I accidentally dragged with
because the minute we kiss,
I can feel the tip of my tongue
bleeding from the pain of a bliss.

I was too easy until I forgot how hard
it was to liven up the moment we were in.
two emotions swam in the lake;
then you prickled at the gaze I gave
like I didn't know you were trying to play it safe.