Beholden.
I am for a tainted past.
Years of scars.
Inwardly vast.
Recollected memories so brawn.
In my dreams.
They will never be gone.
At a time..
Feeling worthless...
Knowing now.
A test..
A test of hidden purpose.
Purpose that has given me preparation.
Inspiration.
Determination.
Motivation for a delightful future is now my affixation.
I am..
Beholden.

I searched for you all my life,
Tried to take you as my wife;

As wild as a tiger,
As fierce as a gale,
Tried to tame you,
To no avail;

Gave you my heart,
Gave you my mind,
You wanted none,
Of what I provide;

You ran away,
I let you slip,
You left me alone,
Biting my lip;

My journey proceeds,
Searching without rest,
I never waver,
From my quest;

Looking around like a bee,
On the search for honey;

How many times did slow words drip
Sweetly, quite lovingly like honey from your lips
The words I could catch, I ate them up with a kiss
There were many from daydreaming, I  did miss
Added up like taffy and getting more sticky as time moved
We've become bound, entangled in words unproved
Lashing out, pointing fingers, who made this mess?
Both shamed to blame for not giving our best

Oh, what a gift,
...Stopping time's flow.
Just to hold you forever,
...Without letting go.

...Racing and burning,
...Forever returning,
...I loved you each day sure as the Sun loves to fly.
...Rising to Day.
...Falling to Night.
...Forever returning,
...Till the day I should die.

Yes, a gift and a curse,
...Our lives but a verse,
...We dance through the stars, as around us they burst.

A bleeding heart,
A world apart,
By sunsets final glow.

Loves tender fruit,
Pure to the root,
Deep in my heart you sow.

Through misty mornings clouding sight,
Through frozen winter rain.
I know tis true...
it beats for you...
my heart and all its pain.