Guess what I did after your dry wedding.
(Get drunk.)
Guess what I did after I met your kids.
(Get drunk.)
Guess what I did after that thing happened that I didn't know how to deal with.
(I'd be more specific if I could actually remember it.)

Years ago, when I lived on the coast,
I made friends with this kid who was a salesman at Sears.
He once sold a coworker his ****.
He was very upset when he told me about it.
(That's the thing about regrets,
they're the type of thing one never forgets.)
We used to hit the bars,
but it never went very far.
He quickly lost interest in it when he learned I wasn't into chasing skirts.
One night we ended up on the beach in our best shoes and shirts,
and he told me how his father had drank himself to death.
It's the type of thing I'll never forget.

her
body was cold
she felt dead
curved as the arctic waves
I couldn't **** her

Ace is a waterfall
And I should never let you go first
Two is you
And you always pick me
Three is me
And I always drink up
Four, floor
And you're always last
Five, guys
And I smile as you drink
Six, chicks
And you laugh
Seven, heaven
And I'm never as close as you
Eight, date
And you're always mine
Nine, rhyme
And I take your favorites
Ten, categories
And you pick cars
Jack is Never Have I Ever
And I know how to get you
Queen, questions
And you know I always lose
King makes the rules
And on my numb lips
I only taste stale Natty
Instead of sweet words
To make you love me forever
But then
If it was a rule
It wouldn't be real
Just forced
Like my laughter
At your friends' jokes
So I finish my beer
Crush the can in my hand
Like you with my heart
And continue to play
The game

You give me hope when I have none left.
You fill my lungs when they're out of breath.
You show me how beautiful it is to be alive,
despite the impending weight of death.

You give peace to my troubled soul.
A value that's worth more than gold.
You trip me out,
you fill me up,
you give me more than I could ever want.

You catch my thoughts when they're out of bounds.
Everything I've lost has suddenly been found.
You make me want to sing Amazing Grace,
but I'm struck dumb every time I see your face.

And in the silent spaces between,
I give thanks.
Thank you, beautiful.
Thank you for saving me.
Thank you for existing.
Thank you for everything.