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Lola Aug 2016
To the students of my school
I would like to say
I AM AFRAID OF YOU
I am afraid of that little voice in your head
The voice know as judgement
I'm afraid that if I do something I wanna do I'm gonna get  glances from you
I'm scared if I sit at a table with you
You will tell me to leave just cause you,don't know me
I don't know if you remember this
but I remember how we were taught to not belong to a group
We were taught to be ourselves
We were taught to accept others
Yet everyday when I walk into school
I still see people in groups
Don't get me wrong I love the idea of ynou belonging somewhere. I also love the idea of finding people who you bond with
But still when I Walk farther into the depths of our school I see people who sit by them selves
People who still don't have an area to belong
Too
I see kids being laughed at
We are all so quick to judge a person
I guess we haven't heard DON'T jUDGE A BOOK BY ITS COVER
Do we ever look inside that book
I mean what's the reason to judge a person so quickly
What's the reason to leave a person out
What's the reason to leave a person like me out
I know this may, sound all cliche like
But believe me, I wouldn't be saying this if I didn't think it would need to be said
See if you truly knew me for who I was You would've known that I don't like talking in front of people
You would've know that death is something that haunts me
You would've know I suffer from anxiety and depression
See in all honesty here, I do not like the fact how, people I was friends with no longer talk to me.
Why is it that I feel I never got to their standers
If I'm honest I never got ur rule book on how to be your friend 101
I also do not like the fact how people feel the need to think they are better than everybody else
We are all Same
Why is it that nobody will say anything
Yet I am the only person up hero
Reading this to you
Which scares the **** out of me
Now see not all of you are bad
But some you are just mean
See I'm usually small like a bug  
I don't bother you yet when you see me you just wanna squish me
I don't get the meaning of this
I've told you that before ,you  don't judge a book by its cover
My only request is to the students in this room
I would like to say that don't you forget what we've talked about in this room. Don't forget that the world here is different than the world out there
Don't forget everything you learned here cause to be honest everything here is what you are going to need to survive out there.
See my voice is as small as a mouse but Today MY Words were LOuder  THAN A BOMB
Lola Jun 2016
ring ring ring* this is a call letting you know that your life is about to be a nightmare. A call telling you are the reason for all the troubles. A call letting you know, how much of a failure you are. A call confirming all your doubts. A call saying that I am the reason. The reason why everything *****. After you let them talk. The caller hangs up and you start to wonder is it truly me . Was I the cause , should i have been born. Then you replay the happiest moments. You start to say " I am not the problem" . You hope that you won't cry yourself to sleep tonight. You hope that tomorrow is a new day. You try to ignore the fact that you get that call. In reality that call has been added to the pile of disgrace. In the end you will label your self as disgrace, but that's ok cause it's only temporaryYou will soon find a new label and the old label will soon fade the day will come when I look back and see all the pain that people have cause me and I will simply yell "*******. And leave
Lola May 2016
I am trying my best not to be sad
I am trying to take off this mask
I am warning you what underneath this
May depress you
It may cause you to look away
I am giving you caution
Don't say that I didn't warn you
Because under this mask
Is a **** load of depression
If u see this face
It will remind you of depressing puppies
It will remind of the why
Unicorns no longer exist
If you haven't NOTICED
I AM TRYING SO ******* HARD TO BE FUNNY RN
As you can tell
I am probably failing
I am going to need a lot
Of Ben and jerry’s to recover this
Maybe even some movies
Unlike a bad break up
Depression is my break up
Depression is what consumes me
In and out
I am no hell  but I can tell you rn
That I am trying
I am trying hard rn
So please
Dont go all crazy on me
Cause ive already got crazy
So this is depression to me
  May 2016 Lola
Joshua Haines
She kisses the boys and girls
that pay the most attention.
The boys play with vapor
and her girls play with tension.
I wish I was the only one
that she will decide to touch
but I am who I am
and, in a way, that is too much.

Sawblade-sunflower petals
wrap around an earthy cushion,
and the humidity hangs in the air
as her beige body is crumpled
and I feel too sober, pushing.

Baby yellow falls apart,
in her hair the flower starts
to trickle onto sheet and pillow,
decorating the absences
that define how hollow
she and I have felt before --
******* like an endangered species
on the killing floor, I whisper once,
I whisper sweet, "Don't you wish
that we didn't meet?"

She kisses the boys and girls
that give the most attention.
I played with vapor
and she played with tension.
And what doth she speak, O brother?

"Eternal is the damnation,
Fleeting is the mercy."
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