I'm afraid of losing my parents.
I'm afraid of death.
Never finding the "right one" is a fear.
Not being financially stable is a fear.
Never being genuinely happy brings me fear.

However,  my greatest fear is not being great; not being successful.

Her mind is corrupted.
The thought of *** is always lingering.
She's only 16.
Why is she having wet dreams?

She's such a ***.
That little thot.

She's always wearing shorts or tights.
I mean, although the weather's hot,
that's still not right!

Her makeup looks nice,
Her curves are right.
But why does she carry herself that way?

She wants all the guys eyes on her.
Dang.
Such an attention seeker!

Her hair is right.
Her heels are high.
I gues you can say she dresses nice.

But wait...

Isn't it normal for teens to think about ***?
Or even imagine it?

Everyone wears shorts in the heat.

She's not fat,
She's not anorexic.
She does have a nice figure.

When she steps out,
her shoes are nice,
her hair is nice,
her make up is right.
She looks fabulous.

She's smart
she has a good personality.

I guess she doesn't hang around girls because guys are cooler.
Most girls are just like me.
Judgemental.

She's actually pretty.
Pretty cool too.
She's comconfident about herself.
That's all.

Maybe she does it all for herself.
I guess it's just my mind that's corrupted.

I'm locked in.
I'm scratching to get out,
No one can hear me.
No one can hear me shout.

I'm locked in,
In a three dimensional cell,
Where no one comes to visit.
No one comes to help.

I'm locked in
and only I can set me free,
You've got the invisible lock,
I've got the invisible key,

Im locked in
and only I can see,
If I want to get out,
I just have to be me.

Why is it that your first love leaves you ****** up?
Like how can something that was once so good scar you so bad?
How can someone that 'loves' you, hurt you so bad?

Crying for hours.
No sleep.
No trust.
Outrageous anger.

You left me in so much pain.

Love.
Trust.
Attention.
Loyalty.
Honesty.
I gave you it all.

But what did you do for me?
Lie.
Cheat.
Make me look and feel like a complete ***.

***** you left me resentful.

Now I'm not safe.
I'm not comfortable.
I feel lost and incomplete.

There's no more love inside of me.
No more trust.

I'm just full of insecurities and hatred.
I'm just numb.

Unbreakable.
Stronger than I've ever been actually.
Emotionless.


But now you see me on my grind.
Feelin myself.
Being successful.
Doing me.
Why you coming back?
Playing like you know me?

See let me get things straight.
You might be able to crack me, but you can't break me. The horrible state you left me only made me stronger.

When a female has a strong head on her shoulders,  she can never be broken. The blood rushing through her head creates stability.
She's independent.
It might be a bit rocky at first, but trust me, she gon be good with,  or without you.
What you thought you destroyed, was just a bit of reconstruction going on. Renovation for bigger and better.


Just look at the beautiful creation you made.

I use to be happy.
I wanna be happY again.
I still need someone to talk to; But that's my problem. 
I need people to make me happy. But then I get so attached and comfortable that my happiness is based on other people.
Its like I've been alone so long that when I find someone that gives me attention,  I get so attached to the point where I crave their attention.
It's like I'm not happy unless I get it.
I don't wanna be weird. I don't wann be clingy. I don't wanna depend on anyone for my happiness. 
I wish it would stop. I really do. But its not my fault.  I may be able to stop it but it would be hard. Be if I can stop it, wouldn't it actually be my fault?