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  Dec 2014 Kelly Nolan
JR Potts
you were the reason I didn't **** myself

this doesn't mean you have to love me

what it means is, I will always love you
  Dec 2014 Kelly Nolan
Tristan
I cling to the edge of the cliff
I'm grasping

Waiting for them to take my hand
To pull me

It's funny how I got here though
I'm laughing

I reached out mine to all of them
They used me

I gave up my own weight for theirs
I'm falling

I could not let them fall instead
They left me

I loved so I could have a friend
I'm lonely

They never asked me to help them
I'm failing

To understand that I have no one to blame but myself
  Dec 2014 Kelly Nolan
ethereal
I crave emotion like I crave pizza
But I can't have it
I can't let myself devour every ounce of love that comes my way
I can't become dependent on the infamous L word that has broken me
I'm emotionally anorexic,
But sometimes I'm bulimic
Sometimes I'll hunt down my prey, and **** them dry of their love
I'll crave it until I'm stuffed full, and then I'll purge it out
I'll tell them I hate them,
I'll tell them to leave forever
I'll push them away until I'm broken and sad and alone
And anorexic again
Until I'm back where I belong, in the corner of my room
Crying, sobbing, craving affection, but not letting myself have it
Because I don't want to be fat with lust
I can't gain a single pound because if I do
I'll be weak.
  Dec 2014 Kelly Nolan
LeaveThisLife
Trust me, I know how it feels
I know exactly how it feels to cry in the shower
So no one can hear you
And waiting for everyone to fall asleep
So you can fall apart
For everything to hurt so bad
You just want it all to end
I know exactly how it feels
I don't blame anyone, I did this to myself
Its my fault, everything is my fault
I feel this tiredness that sleep can't fix
And please stop asking if I'm okay
I'm tired of lying
I'm tired of living
I'm tired of trying
I'm tired of coping
I'm tired of hoping
I'm tired of existing
I'm tired of breathing
I'm just done
Because I'm never truly happy
Some days I'm just a little less sad than the rest
When you reach the point of being so sad you're numb
You're going to miss the ability to cry
Because depression is like drowning
And seeing everyone around you breathing
Because depression is not a choice
Its a deep hole you cannot climb out of
Trust me, I know how it feels
To beg God to just take it all away
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