Acetone*

It wouldn't take
a simple overnight
to have enough of him, now;
You miss him,
isn't that right,
as you tie your shoe laces
and clench your jaw tight.
How long is soon?
The waiting party's over,
your resistance, a deflated balloon.
You're running out of air, silly girl,
too attached with your care.
You're a switch and he flips you
from nothing to everything,
and you're weaponless.
So, do yourself a favour,
and stop counting all the seconds
you've waited for him,
stop wasting your 11:11,
or else when the clock
finally breaks down,
the time might just **** you.

You were red,
I was blue.
You turn lilac whenever I'm near,
Then red violet when you talk to me.
I turn teal when you smile,
Then uncertain as indigo when you call my name.
Then yellow came around,
You turned orange.
I turned green.
Whenever you're with me I turn you brown.
Now I disgust you.
Now I ***** you.
I strip myself of the hues I've made.
Now I'm just black.
Devoid of anything, of anyone.
Of us, of you.

No, I don't think you understand
When I say I want you
I don't think you understand
When I say you're my favourite

The way your skin feels on mine
with your fingers holding tighter
Like you're positively struggling to not eat me alive
Like you're breathing the most intoxicating air

I don't think you understand
When I tell you to tell me secrets
I don't think you understand
When you show me that little piece of your hidden side

The way I melt cell by cell
The way I beam like headlights on a deer
like the sun of my universe has lit up
Because I've never had a flavour like you

I've never tasted anything like your lips
I've never heard anything like your voice
I've never been hit so hard, like a match on its box
I've never been lit on fire like this

No...
I don't think you understand
When I say *I want you

This life
Can be boiled down
To a few out of body experiences
In my boxers
In my bed
With my dog
Laying on the floor
Between the clean pile
And the ***** one

It can be traced
By borrowed books
And cigar butts
And little bits of broken glass
That I still find on the back porch

It can be measured
If you hold it up to the light
And see how much shines through,
Leaking out the other side
Like the drip of a faucet
To be carried away
By the river
That takes all life
Eventually

I found myself
Washed up in the dark
On the cool wet stone
Of the shore.
I couldn’t see the river
But the current rumbled
With the voice of the ender
Reaching out to pull me in.

I saw a Stone Lady looking my way
With her eternal grey eyes
She held a stone water jug
She was staring intensly at me,
So I asked,
Stone Lady, what hidest thou in thine  unblinking stare?
To my utter amazement,
She replied,
Eternity,
You temporary thing.

I don’t remember the colour of your eyes,
or the place where you last kissed me.
In fact
did you ever give me a last kiss?
cuz if you did, I lost it.
There’s too much junk in all my pockets
and I
think it should be in the pocket by my heart.

I don’t remember the shape of your smile,
or when you last held my hand.
And deep inside
my soul is searching for your handprints.
It’s messy and it’s dusty in there
and there’s no light cuz I forgot to pay my bills
and I
keep stumbling in the dark on the remains of too many souls

I don’t remember the flow of your thoughts
or the way you accentuated words.
But mostly
it’s the maze-like way you loved me
that I seem to have forgotten.
So far away in time and space it all appears tonight,
but I
am sure you loved me one late evening under the moon.