julianna

julianna Apr 2021

when I told my therapist that I felt lonely,
she said in response that
she didn’t want to belittle my experience
and I only half-heartedly believed her
when she told me that we all feel lonely,

but darlin’ I know you’re so lonely.

at the end of the day, we’re all in this together.

julianna Apr 2021

a note

I didn’t see it ever stopping
I wanted to be free
When will nothing hurt anymore?
I grew tired of guessing and failing
This is why I did it
I was tired and burnt out
Even my gut reminded me with a stabbing pain,
Reminded me of everything I would never and could never be
So with this note
I set myself free.

Don’t try to follow,
You’ll learn to live without me.

P.S. Your love was always enough. I had always spiraled so quickly, it was just too hard to catch myself this time.

Don’t worry about be, I’ll be fine I’ll be fine I’ll be fine

julianna Apr 2021

throat

Throat tightens,
Eyes puff.
The manifestation of human emotion,
Tears drip-drops down my face.
Why does crying hurt my body?
As if my mind is not in enough pain already.

julianna Dec 2020

girl with the red balloon

To the girl with the red balloon
Who carries it like a cloud
Her face can hide her gloom
And her beauty is always around
But there are times
When the glimmer fades
And she descends into dark days.
Her smile still shines,
Her heart still beats,
But her mind can’t see the light.
What kind of things are you thinking,
Girl with the red balloon?
What kind of people hurt you?
Can you forgive them?
Can you forgive yourself, too?
If you ever find yourself floating too far off the ground...
If you’re so up high and forgot to let go,
Remember we all land in our feet
No matter how far we fall.

julianna Dec 2020

grays

I think there is beauty in the fine lines
Hands that bend and crack
I never saw it there before
But something old is something new
I’m waiting for my own crown of wisdom
Youth is a treacherous heart
So I pass the many years waiting
For those many gray hairs, waiting
But until then I’ll just watch and listen
And maybe learn along the way

julianna Oct 2020

dig deep

I bleed a bit to find the words
I dig deep,
Uncovering things I’m afraid of seeing.
Maybe I should turn around
But for the sake of expression
And finding beauty in pain,
I will do it over and over and over
Again.

This is what it feels like to be an artist, to create.

#art #expression #creation

julianna Oct 2020

rewind <<<

If I hit rewind,
If I just start over,
Would I actually be happy?
Or would I just find another thing to fret about?
Life isn’t about perfection,
But about finding the good in the imperfect.

#life #happiness #happy #perfect #imperfect