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1.2k · Apr 2017
The Other Side
Somewhere far, far away.
Beyond the crowds and city lights.
I smile at the clouds with you on my mind.

I find peace at last,
one with the earth.
I can hear your voice again and it doesn't hurt.
I can thank you for saving my life.
My guide through those big city lights.

They pulled me away,
but you kept me at bay.
I thought of you every morning.
Your texts always got me through the day.
I was too bitter that you left me to thank you for that.
I take everything I said back.
I never would've made it without you.

2 years clean, I mean,
maybe we can meet in my dreams.
And I can tell you what those times really mean to me.

I thank you,
Until I see you again.

Somewhere far, far away.
Beyond the crowds and city lights.
I smile at the clouds with you on my mind.
i wrote this while listening to the other sound from the get down for the 1000th time
825 · Jan 2017
Where do we go?
please be watching over me
i’m sinking
into nothing
im smaller
my fragments out of reach
nothing to hold onto
im falling
please be waiting for me when its my turn
i wanna see your face
when its all over can i fall into your embrace
sometimes i still feel the warmth on your side of the bed
it hurts with each waking breath
i’ve always wanted to die
to make it all end
but if i make out will you still be my best friend
will you still be waiting for me
will you be watching over me
are you still cheering me on
will i see your face pop up when im gone
or is it true what they say
that theres nothing where you are
that it’s all darkness
are we reborn
where do we go
i want to hold you
please
just one more day
please
559 · Mar 2017
Untitled
the sun hasn't been out in days
it's like the sky lost you too
maybe i'm not the only one who feels this pain

the sun hasn't been out in days
i'm really starting to miss you
i've been meaning to ask if you, felt this pain too

the sky hasn't been shedding the coldest tears
i hope you wore your coat
i don't think the cold is letting go any time soon
and i see that, neither are you since
you haven't answered any of my calls

maybe the universe doesn't want us together
maybe our paths were only meant to cross for a limited time
but oh god you're always on my mind

the sun hasn't been out in days
i hope she's doing okay
526 · Feb 2017
to her
To the girl who was once mine,
I think about you all the time.
These memories cloud my head,
stuck are these words left unsaid.

To the girl who was once mine,
I hope this can make up for lost time.
I hope you found the girl of your dreamss,
even if it hurts that she wasn't me.
466 · Jan 2017
2am thoughts
its really late and i don't know where else to go
all of my friends are starting to think its all for show
but why haven't i been able to clear my head
why do i feel so empty in my own bed
my mind is the scariest place I've ever seen,
over the years i had managed to keep it clean,
but your name and that laugh is stuck to me like glue
and everything reminds me of you
and it’s all seeping into my skin
and the more i wipe it off the more i'm reminded that it's there
and i'm so scared to look myself in the mirror and see what I've become
my heart is still beating but i'm so warm
how am i numb
am i living or is this a dream
i can't even tell anymore
everything keeps spinning
i'm scared to close my door because i'm scared i'll lock them in,
they've already nested in my mind,
why am i sick this time.
443 · Jan 2017
Incomplete
you kept me together
it was like you controlled the weather
not the weather outside,
the weather from within
you managed to clear the skies
and clear my mind
it didn't even matter if they were all lies
it didn't even matter that you're not here
to fix me now

if i close my eyes, it almost feels the same
if i close my eyes
and picture you here
i can almost mask the pain

i swear i can still see you in the corner of my eye
i swear i hear you in the darkest of the night
i feel you here
405 · Jan 2017
Soft pinks
Soft pinks
light blues
all this sorrow
all for you
you cloud my mind
leave nothing but rain
every breath is nothing but pain
i miss you
349 · Oct 2016
Bliss
I see the light
I hear them sing
The angels have finally come back for me

The grass is green
The water runs clear
I don't hear the voices
They must be miles from here

I can feel the warmth on my skin
I can feel the warmth from within
They've come back for me.
i was watching the sunrise after a tough night and it helped me realize a lot of things that i need to fix and a lot of things i need to let go of
309 · Sep 2016
What's the source?
what's the source
from sadness to finishing a paper
this is the most asked question
no one wants to hear the little things
no one cares about the small details that make the source so important
we all want to hear about the source
the big bang
they want to open you up and cut it out and tell you if you passed or not
they’ll critique your work and point out those flaws and still ask for the source
the source isn't what hurts
it’s what falls apart due to the build up
it’s what rips you apart from the inside out
it’s the strongest part
why can’t we focus on the build up
so i don't have to fall into this dark abyss that forces me to compare the source of my sadness to the struggles of citing a paper
so i won't have to think of everything I've ever done wrong when im asked what my sources were
who my sources were and how they helped to build my paper
the source only hurts when you poke at it
help me make them stop poking at it
you'll see how little the source matters
my words and my ability to use them to support my claim should be enough to choose whether i pass or fail not the ability to use someone else as my backbone
i should be my own backbone
grade that
224 · Sep 2016
Deep in Sadness
trying to recall the shadows on the wall
i couldn’t make them out
the way they towered over my bed
their voices controlling the thoughts in my head
total darkness
the cold breeze and blank stares
I’m screaming for help but i keep losing my breath
i keep falling down i have no strength left
what do i do if I’m not consoled by you
your voice, like a beautiful melody
you were the greatest composer to ever live inside my mind
i keep your soft music alive
i sing your songs all the time
but recently things have started to change
your music fades
it feels like you’ve gone away
I’m lost inside this darkness
your smile the only light to guide me
but i can’t find you
this cold breeze, these blank stares
i thought i heard your song but theres no one out there
what do i do if the only map i had was you

— The End —