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Jan 2024 · 58
Another Second
John Bartholomew Jan 2024
The clock ticks by as you think its your time
Tick Tock
The dreams slowly fade as you think of what you should have made
Tick Tock
Another second gone as you recount those lost ventures
Tick Tock
Oh what you could have done with more time
Tick Tock
Tick Tock
Tick Tock
But life was good at the time you made it
Tick Tock
For how was you to know the end was now
Tick Tock
As I stand and take my final bow
Tick Tock
Tick Tock
Tick Tock
That watch has now stopped
Tick...

JJB
Jan 2024 · 101
Them and Us
John Bartholomew Jan 2024
Classes
Segregation between the masses
I'm above you but only when it matters
Looking down my judgemental nose
Friends with those I must and those who I chose
A regular guy from my head to my toes
But we can be picky sometimes I suppose
So who are we to pick our circle of friends
The ones we ignore and the ones who we would lend
Those conversation to have and an ear to friendly bend
But some are translucent and to hell you silently send
As they disapear into nowhere and try to amend
We read our daily papers and some journos we agree
Some are spot on and have life down to a tee
Others are so WOKE we have to seethe
But that doesn't mean we are chosen on race
For those we love and who hits first base
It's an individual choice on who is chosen and down to taste
As we are surely past the colour of our skin and who sits on the bus
We judge on who we are, who we know, and who we trust
It will always fall down to a certain choice I'm afraid,
Them and us.

JJB
#whoisright #getinline #judgementalthoughts
Jan 2024 · 92
Thats Just Life
John Bartholomew Jan 2024
Welcome to my life, always stuck on tedium 
Every day, the same consistent grill setting, medium
The same hellos, goodbyes, and the taxman who we'll always be feeding them
Easter will be coming soon, chocolate already on the shelves
Christmas now been and gone, what do Santas helpers now do,
are they still known as elves?
Have a little dance, a little drink, even a swagger to the cheeky girls, (go on then, touch my ***)
Then that hangover tomorrow, carries on like a 3 day ton
Sweat it out, half hour on the x-ray bed, a cheap tan in the fake sun
Now to relax away from your life and let the bath run
As that's just it
Your life
My life
It's just life
All a bit of fun

JJB
Jan 2024 · 115
A Permanent Love
John Bartholomew Jan 2024
Thoughts -

The stuff you bought 
The language you taught
Those fish you caught
Your balance stuck at nought 
All will change, all are temporary 

Love -

A proposal on the Nile
That night you went wild
Ended up on the tiles
And those times you both get riled
But from all these emotions comes one thing,
Love

Your child

❤️
#purecheese #parenthood
Jan 2024 · 118
Favourites
John Bartholomew Jan 2024
We all have our favourite something 
Be it a piece of jewellery, probably your wedding ring
Some even a favourite parent
One from hell, the other heaven sent
Sometimes its a piece of fruit
Strawberrys on cereals? Blueberrys are a better suit
Or even a best friend
Some go on but others fit the trend
Whats your favourite film?
The one and only North by Northwest
Hitchcock also done The Birds, its hard to pick the best
Football has its one and only's
Once Premiership winners Blackburn Rovers or the mighty Burnley
Go on then, pick a colour that suits you
Depending on the weather, a nice bright pink or a moody dark blue
Your 'go to' shop or you fancy a change in perspective
Look at you go, a fighter that never quits
Hell, we could go on forever in picking our bestist habits
But its what suits now, not a forever in our all-time-favourites

JJB
Nov 2023 · 126
Life Goes On
John Bartholomew Nov 2023
Mr Bartholomew - it's unlikely you will ever walk again 

Hard-hitting
Forever sitting
A life too young for me to be fitting
Twenty-seven and I just swerved heaven
Who knows if it's a place I'd get in
We've all done naughty things
But not too much to dance nor sing  
From six foot five to me now hardly seeing
Now to contemplate me forever being
Self-evacuation, front and rear
Uncontrollable accidents, my biggest fear
The loss of real friends and those who can trend
An easy decision to make to those who wouldn't watch me mend
But life goes, Jeez does life roll on
My amazing wife and daughter who I adore
Who gave me fresh life and opened closing doors
But I won't go all soppy and repeat as a bore
For life is an adventure not a governed guided tour.

Life Goes On

JJB
Nov 2023 · 1.1k
And The Point Is....?
John Bartholomew Nov 2023
A thousand thoughts keep flowing through your mind
But there is only one that you want to find.
And the....
Let down, by that crowd you thought cared
When asked for help, most just stop and blankly stared 
And the....
Cannot find a job for love nor money
Up and down this land, from Glasgow to the Brummies
And the.....
Qualified to the hilt, yet still couldnt quite manage a till
We just don't want you here
And the point....
Maybe it's because I cannot walk, or the quips I give at the final talk
Isn't this an interview to be the best of you
Again, and the point....
But I keep looking, answering, posting
For what now, I am just not knowing
And the point is....?

Daddy? Daddy? Daddy!
Its 5:37am and I don't care.
And there is my point.
#neverstoptrying
Oct 2023 · 1.2k
Feedback
John Bartholomew Oct 2023
Sat idle in my stand,
watching,
waiting,
on the rest of the band
A quiet wooden box of strings
Humble and shining, just ready to do my thing
They plod through the acoustics, oh such a bore
It's time to let rip baby, gimme some power chords!
As the hits keep coming, soon to take my bow
Let's deafen these crazed punters, let me start this row
As you thought that noise was Mr Marshall all at the wrong settings
Uh-uh dear listeners, it's my veins just over jetting
Pick me up you freak, finger me into some heavenly patterns
So let's rock,
let's roll,
and let this frustrated cut out do its feedback chatting

🤟🏼

JJB
#thatsrocknroll #feedback #turnitup
Oct 2023 · 129
Queens Road
John Bartholomew Oct 2023
From buying my first guitar
To watching strippers in the corner bar
So much can happen
In a street not that well known
A name change now The Broadway
Even this cannot change its sodden ways
Rileys now a place to lose weight
Some games I had when I'd lost my stake
The dive bars now a place to skin up
A Caribean twist with a Guinness to sup
Installing the refit to the Clipso hairdressers
To having a row with the fella who worked there
As to most it will always be the Harlequin cut through
But to us kids in the 90s it was a place of scandel and curfew

JJB
Sep 2023 · 175
The Kid with no Imagination
John Bartholomew Sep 2023
Think outside the box
What box?
The box with six trapped walls
Where the thoughts bounce back
Where you're thinking its a trap
But these walls are made to be climbed and jumped
Take a step back
Focus
Breathe
Get your head down and seize
Those wonderous dreams you know can prevail
The brain is a tale
From what can make come true
Pirates and bandits
That big fish you can land it
It is all inside and down to you
Imagination is key
For without where'd we be
All chasing tails and running in blind circles
So just think again
Putting paper to pen
Your mind can change the world once unleashed from its cage

JJB
#imagine
Sep 2023 · 194
The Man who Stared at Walls
John Bartholomew Sep 2023
Staring
Not caring
Of the words that are being said
Pondering
Just wondering
Of how he woke from his bed
Induced coma
That'll show ya
They all thought that you were dead
But nothing can stop me
Even that graceful old oak tree
That still stands and watches me in dread
As I now drive past her
This time slower, not faster
As we silently share that moment not said

JJB
Aug 2023 · 125
The Cafe
John Bartholomew Aug 2023
They come, they go, they order what they know
Some dressed in hi-vis, pin stripe,
even those in miniskirts, hi heels with their toes on show
A hard night's graft, taken in from the draft
Five minutes they'll never remember
From the morning rush
Some late without a brush
A breakfast forgotten in the depths of hangover
Old biddies sit and chatter
The price of life now their natter
And their tea now costing a small fortune
But to socialise and talk
To just sit and then a walk
Is the highpoint to some people's day 😉

The Cafe

JJB
Aug 2023 · 370
A Lone Tree
John Bartholomew Aug 2023
Stood alone in a field of ever change
The others seem to catch on and evolve
But to me I'm happy staying put, stuck in my ways, a little strange
Liking a risqué joke, a mild poke, a barrel now sadly broke
Words we now cannot use
But arise in slapstick, a rarely lit fuse, mosty after a wee drop of *****
Kids now think we are all the same skin
As if nothing happened in 10,000 years and its all thrown in the bin
And if you disagree, have a voice, have a choice, you now live in sin
For being told how to live is an everyday occurance
Speed limits, different cynics, all told to coinline with this BBC
For our thoughts are now banished, no longer to be free
And sadly, people are beginning not to see
That you do actually stand alone in life, leaning into the breeze
For we all are really,
just,

A Lone Tree

JJB
Aug 2023 · 141
High Street, Bye Street...
John Bartholomew Aug 2023
Watching the high street bustling by
I'm not sure if I'm disgusted, ill digested or just want to cry
The buildings, the streets, the people, all want to make me weep
The Turkish barbers, the tattoo parlour,
All just a front they must keep
Friends with carers, soon with pallbearer, a life they cannot lead alone
Sat on street corners, dealers with quarters, all nattering on their mobile phones
Most smoking a vape, different flavours to take
So many races I could not name
Nowhere to park
The place an old mask
Of a generation now mostly all gone
Just jump online
Amazons just fine
For those shoes to be dropped at my door
We just sit in our seats
No longer a heartbeat
Our old friend
The British High Street....

JJB
#buynow #byenow
Jul 2023 · 148
Paddy Scrounger
John Bartholomew Jul 2023
Taking your money doesn't give me anxiety
I'll keep scrounging from this inept society
The more I can get that just keeps fuelling me
And the drugs I get, oh, the varieties!

My kids don't even know I exist
Mostly a one-night stand out on the ****
Just mates of my dealer and ones of my sis
It starts with a sniff and then onto a kiss

Yet we breed them
We need them
To harbour our woes

We feed them
We house them
Just to keep us on our toes

We curse them
We nurse them
Not every good deed shows

And then we cloth them
Rarely dethrone them
As politicians, they hate to be exposed

That scrounger
On his sun lounger
Slurping Pina colada
In the sun where no one can harm you
Away from Kerry and the sniveling Garda
And Donal who wrongly barred you

The fingers I show you are now two
As I laugh at the times you said I'd never pull it through
Watching the locals just dancing in their tutu's
San Migual please Pedro and, of course, one for you!

Paddy Scrounger

JJB
Jul 2023 · 112
Midlife County Crisis!
John Bartholomew Jul 2023
She broke my Hert in Beds
So time to get my own back onto which this spree it led
I spread my love all around the Shires
With some still left hanging on the wire
From Dorset to Devon were the ones from heaven
Losing count in Cornwall but sure it was near eleven
Never crossing the mire to the depths of Wales
And not considered the trip across the channel,
I prefer a fry-up to a plate full of snails
Through the Sexes onto God's garden Kent
Posh girls aplenty so time to build my tent
But the North was always great and a whole lot of fun,
from the bland to the bold and even up the...Oh Matron!
Glasgow slid to Edinburgh and then onto Perth
I tell my friends that these are the cities to unearth
Now time to delve back south to the places I know best
I just needed a midlife crisis to get it off my chest
Now to add the county back to the Shires I forgot
Jeez, there was a fair few, Bucks seems like a fair good shot!

JJB
#midlifecrisis
Jul 2023 · 81
Fuck Work
John Bartholomew Jul 2023
Sat staring at my computer screen
(The monotone)
Wondering if this really is all a bad dream
(Feels like a lobotomy)
Work so dull I just want to scream
(Someone please clobber me)
My thoughts so dusty and dry
(Bus ride home, some hellish geometry)
Blueberrys grow through the side of the fence
(Free food from our Gods own apple tree)
But somebody please put me into that long sleep,
And out of my own failed misery

JJB
Jul 2023 · 126
Broken Flowers
John Bartholomew Jul 2023
Ripped from stem, like we had no life at all
Our petals just in bloom, now never to be seen fall
Yellow, red, or blue
It's life as true as you
Giving pollen to be carried out by the bees
To impregnate the hay-fever sufferer along with the trees
Just a passing phase once summer has gone by
To be planted in the shade by novices who do but try
But we regrow, we divert, we regain new powers
So never underestimate the strength we have,
us,
Broken Flowers

JJB

💐
Jul 2023 · 261
DREGS
John Bartholomew Jul 2023
What's left at the bottom of your pint
The disguards, the mouthwash, the unwanted kerfuffle
Measured up to society
A load of ****** trouble
The majority queued at the job centre
The dreamers, the wash-ups, old Ken still clutching his Fender
Better off in a tidal wave
I really hate to tell you
But that's life and has been since day one
They come and go, these forgotten days of fun
Sometimes you have money, others you have none
But think big, think tall, better days will always come

JJB
Jul 2023 · 95
Dump my Load
John Bartholomew Jul 2023
15 days on the side of road
Nowhere to sleep since I left my home
I just need somewhere to dump my load
Kicking up dust with the frogs and toads
I just need some place to dump my load
No lights or bedding to call my abode
I just need somewhere to dump my load
No right move in stalemate mode
I just needed some place to dump my load
Not one PC could break this code
I just need someone somewhere to dump my load
And when, I finally figure out, this meaning, I'm froze
Please little darling, just let me dump my load!

JJB
Not to be rude
Jun 2023 · 152
Sandy...Goodbye
John Bartholomew Jun 2023
This isnt a poem about a girl I once knew
Cos let me tell you man, there has been a few
As I have met many names as Sandy, Amy and those I have forgotton
And surnames not asked like Smith, Jones and McConnon
Goodbyes can also be said to streets I have lived
To my neighbours I once loved and those I'd like to seive
I'm writing this bard a bit to soon as I have still nowhere to go
Just looking at lottery wins in my dreams, to-and-fro
Would I head north or over to the greens of Ireland
Or back to where I grew up, Dorset and its Jurassic Sands
Would moving house make it harder on Wilf the cat
I'm sure he'd find a new place to prowl, they all have the odd rat
And driving up the A1, past the fighting metal zebras
Whilst missing the *** shop everytime, some stories to tell you
Looking up and seeing those birds of prey
Can see why they're are based here, the good old RSPB
But the pubs are closing one by one and now the Queens Head
If this keeps on happening, soon the town will be dead
So time to pick that fantasy house now on Rightmove
And say goodbye to Sandy,
with those fantasy millions, its hard to even choose....

JJB
#Rightmove #Sandy
Jun 2023 · 127
Beaver
John Bartholomew Jun 2023
An animal that we learnt to trust
Its cunning, its planning, a must
A lot of mammals are not a fan
But look at the potential after building that dam
The river now flows to a part of ruin
Let's celebrate this genius on the wood that they've been chewing
To build a habitat for this beast of some distinction
Who has made life for others without bragging on completion
Oh, and its also what men call their wife's nunny
Strange how words switch to mean something funny!

******

JJB
Jun 2023 · 114
Mattress
John Bartholomew Jun 2023
The time has come and our relationship is over
Our bed, our thoughts, our memories sat on it with our pup, Rover
Ten years is its limit according to the boffs
It had its positions with who was on top
But you cheated
Then Charlie bleated
That liar now on our mattress, his **** wrongly heated
We had our bounce
Ounce after ounce
Sweating, girating, that once **** flounce
But you have now left me in pain
Who's mark was that, now left a small brown stain
If propped up on the drive to washaway in the rain
So they have a thing called memory foam
If recorded lately it would just hear us row and ****** moan
From you snoring at a ghastly hour
To me just wishing and pleading
Bring back that love we lost
Thrown out with a taste
Now, oh so sour

JJB
Jun 2023 · 203
Beautiful Differences
John Bartholomew Jun 2023
The love of difference is our strange attraction
I blew at maths and copied your fractions
Not caring if you are black, white, green or yellow
I rocked on guitar whilst you plucked that cello
With instruments like that we'd never start a band
Just laugh at our disparity whilst walking hand in hand
The cool kids loved you as I was just a mess
But you loved the way I sauntered, not trying to impress
Hey, why try and improve on whats never likely
Just hold stance, slip her the key, to the backdoor of what may be
Nobody said a word as they shared ice cream on the pier
Eastbourne had its gossips and those you regulary sneer
For she didnt drive and took the bus afar
As I souped up my Cosworth to be the fastest by far
Not a pill in sight as she didnt touch the stuff
Me overdosing on the A's and the B's then feeling kinda rough
Stroking her persian in her minimilist one bedroom flat
I fill mine with hoardings not room to swing her cat
But she laughs at what a state I can sometimes be in
For she is a keeper, a forgiver, overlooking my daily daft sins

Beautiful Differences

JJB
May 2023 · 112
Love Is (Part II)
John Bartholomew May 2023
Love is the stupidest of things
Like crossing the road and beating the sound
Thinking its loose change but turns out to be pounds
Love is the daftest of things
When you sycronise in union on a song you both sing
To sharing sweets from the bag and pretending with a Haribo ring
Love is also a surprise at times
From trying a new curry after saying you would never change
Now its Katsu all the way as the taste is lovingly strange
Love is also a monopoly and can be sometimes testing
From that one lost sole you met one night on the bus
Now divorce papers all the way and wondering about the fuss
But love is what love is, be it starting with a but(t)
Measuring against the last and to see if your friends smile or tut
From going through the rounds to who makes the final cut
Love is what love is and not just some passing faze
Lets just hope you make the cut as we all have our funny ways

Love Is (Part II)

JJB
May 2023 · 128
He/She/Him/Her
John Bartholomew May 2023
Fitting in was never the problem
It's for what you stand and to show that emblem
For I am real and not some concept
Not a freak of nature that looks inept
You have mayonaisse at a sandwich party
Just rise above the rest because you're a bit arty-farty
Wearing a leotard sat on top a double-decker
Shout at the judgementals like you're Boris Becker
Forgot to shave but still wear that skirt
Look at the men with a mind just filled with utter dirt
Never mind my on show Adams apple
It's just another man in me that I'd love to blindly grapple
But the world is coming to this way of thinking
Instead of hiding in a hole where I once was sinking
Struggling with a size eleven stilleto in Next
Jazz up my shoes to whatever suits best
Stood outside the club, cold, smoking my ***
This is what I was born to be, I'm just a young hag.

He/She/Him/Her

JJB
#trangender #transisbeautiful #transgendermale
May 2023 · 93
The Fisherman
John Bartholomew May 2023
Sat, gathering thoughts
Those fish may come
Of which, I am not bothered

Silence, the will of Gods nature
No constant natter
Just the breeze and where it may take you

I'm not here to break any records
Just to escape
A rat race that pays lifes sectors

No WIFI, no buzz in my pocket
To switch life off
Drift away to another place where peace is mindset

My line, it starts to twitch
I smile and let it be one
Its just Gods nature, that made him scratch that itch

Be at one once sat alone
Think on events and where you can go
Then know you are king of life,
just sat by the river, on your throne.

The Fisherman

JJB
May 2023 · 187
Last orders!
John Bartholomew May 2023
Costa and Starbucks are closing down our pubs
Now rubbing shoulders with those I hate, from the ones I used to love
No dartboard or billiards all playing our simple game
Now who has the latest Ipod or laptop, as they've just rushed from the train
A shout of Roger, Rihanna, down to this coffees going cold!
To paying over six pound a drink and not a care once sold
Company credit card all the way, no thought to the petty cash kitty
Looking up, the old pub tiles still grace the brick built wall, oh such a forgotten pity.

Last orders!

JJB
Apr 2023 · 138
Lambretta Pants
John Bartholomew Apr 2023
Dad always said you're either a MOD or a Rocker
Well after a few years of choosing I decided on the clobber
Pin stripe suit and a nice comfy parka
Not some grease monkey, slicked back hair, who looked like he'd not seen a bath yet
I preferred the music, the beat, the soul
They liked grit, the grind and the ***** rock and roll
And then came the final choice in which world you did bounce
Vespa, Lambretta or a Triumph in a way to announce
So did I look the hard nut sat on my BSA?
I'd rather look like Mr Cool, thinking I'm Ace Face today
Trip's down to Brighton for a fight on the beach
Before having our breakfast at an all you can eat
Those were the days where you could really have a laugh
Then a trip back home, best have my tea and an early bath
Stick on an album by The Faces or The Who
And up early for work, into town via Clapham then Waterloo
When nothing too much mattered and the world seemed easy
RAF target on my back, nice shiny shoes, that's how you'll see me.

JJB
Apr 2023 · 126
Caring
John Bartholomew Apr 2023
Caring for the caring is a trait we should all be sharing
Be it a hug
A kiss
Or just a friendly pint for the craic
Their are some who have none and prey to have those back
This pandemic has hit the world hard
Dealt a costly hand to the weak and those in fear
But some have been angels who share a story with a friendly tear
So think of the few,
The help,
That lifeline belt
Who spoke those words that made you smile
For those are the ones who helped you fight on
And just take that extra mile

JJB

#Covid-19
#pandemic
Mar 2023 · 98
Last Chance Saloon
John Bartholomew Mar 2023
Growing up
Not giving a ****
Those days I really miss for the kick
Not rightly thinking
Out all night drinking
Not a care to who I hurt or what I did
Stumbling home from Batchwood
Just fifteen miles to Watford
Please God just send me to bed
Now in my forties
So much time just plain naughty
Never acting on those dreams I had in my head
All I need now is that final dance
To prove that I really do stand with such emphatic stance
And to banish those acts and to get rid
This is no begging letter
Because I know I can do so much better
Just one last chance to ride that horse I fell off as a kid
Into the setting sun
Where you can watch me as I run
Take flight on adventure,
into my final bid


JJB
Mar 2023 · 144
Emerging
John Bartholomew Mar 2023
200 million years since the last lot were here
AD,BC, not applicable
No religeon to now fear
For Earth has been through its toughest of showers
From the cosmos to the ice frosts
It slowly rebuilds its supernatural powers
As life as we once knew it
Steadily grows again from the ground
A third phenomenon now raises its heartbeaten head
To see what planet is left to be compound
What God of universal proportion could make this reoccur
Are they bored in their place of work
Twiddling their thumbs
Calculating their sums
Prodding with a fork, ideas of whats next, but mainly smalltalk
But something is now slowly growing
A breed to outdo the previous they had sewing
Life as they know it has a fresh new face
Something truly phenominal
To inherit this Earth and put life back in its place
Until that day
We continue to **** this planet of everything it has
Down to its very last natural fibre
From its oil and its wind and down to the sea
A home of now I could not, unfortunately, describe her

JJB
#saveourplanet
Feb 2023 · 109
The Other Side of Me
John Bartholomew Feb 2023
There is me
The Copper/The Nurse/The Firefighter/The man in black who drives that humble hurse
There is also me
The Mother/The Father/The Sister/The Brother/The off the clock non-decision maker
I'm paid to care
I'm afraid to even dare
You love me when I'm working
You see me hiding if not lurking
Always up the craic when on the beat
Always hiding away and crossing the street
For I am as two faced as you can get
So don't put your life in my hands or its something you might regret.

JJB
Jan 2023 · 320
Bridges
John Bartholomew Jan 2023
Bridges are a rule of life
As we cross one everyday
Most of them are invisible
Some subtle
But stepped over without having to pay
They link us
They heard us
Moving us all in different ways
Then some are left broken
A day we left unspoken
Kindred in leaving it at bay
Some still have a troll sat waiting to pounce
A discrepancy
Some monstrosity
That carries a debt weighing more than an ounce
Yet most have a stream that gently runs beneath
No burden
No guilt
Just a subtle flow, falling like a browned autumn leaf 🍂

JJB
Jan 2023 · 107
Disabled Daydreams
John Bartholomew Jan 2023
I roll into the shower and feel the heat
The hot water on my head, my shoulders, my soul, but not my feet
Then I close my eyes and wish this forever as my sleep.....


SMASH!

I look around and my baby has tipped over my catheters
Well she has only just turned one, God bless her
How could I wish for a life away,
When I now have her forever in my days

JJB
Dec 2022 · 86
Little Fox
John Bartholomew Dec 2022
You already had me broke
With not a word had you ever spoke
That flash of cherry, not quite blond, had my heart in a bond
And a grin to just tick my box
So cunning
So sweet
So beautiful,
My adorable,
My daughter,
My Little Fox

JJB
Dec 2022 · 169
My Kinda People.
John Bartholomew Dec 2022
If you want to be with me then you got to feel with me
Take a step sideways and view it from another place
Because this road ain't no yes man take
This is a ride called dare to dream
A different scheme
Some place where we just have to escape
Eat our lives on the go and not from the everyday plate
Think outside that box, that one woven by the grey man
Wear a different suit,  a flat cap and be the man that, that, that
Those arms don't have to be made of tweed
Just throw caution to those winds and dabble with some
We'd all like to tell the boss to scarper, that's it, I'm off
When in reality we all drink and feed from the same corporate trough
But my kind of people do still exist
Its making that step, that push, that that that
That one last final treacherous walk
To see if you do talk the talk
To pop champagne with a bursting cork
To **** that ex boss with a burning fork and say,
You're my kinda people

JJB
Dec 2022 · 123
Madame Palm
John Bartholomew Dec 2022
Awake with no memory of where nor how
Ah, home sweet home
That cab driver, please take a bow
They come in patches of time
Of where
Of when
Of go on then, just pass me down the wine
Sporadic I think is the word to use
Of who I spoke too
Of who I copped off with
Of who I abused
And now I look down to a mess of lettuce and kebab
At the time, the best I'd ever had
Stained on the bedsheets, mum'll whip out the Daz
And now to celebrate the night with a touch of self pleasure
Locked door leisure
Release from the tethers
Just roll me in feathers
As I grab that reliant sock to wipe up the measures

Madame Palm (and her 5 lovely daughters)

JJB
#sorry
#notsorry
#yeahsorry
Nov 2022 · 132
The Pure
John Bartholomew Nov 2022
What is judged on those who live days so pure
Who lay awake wondering on life
If doing good now leads to a heavenly door
I might stop swearing
I might take more care
I might imagine a life not bearing
I might
I won't
I wouldn't dare
For those who abstain from the rough
The cautious
The caring
The rare
Are an animal of which there are few
And a life I couldn't bare

The Pure

JJB
Nov 2022 · 87
Be You.
John Bartholomew Nov 2022
Another world
A place of escape
Not a second home but a place to start alone
Afresh
Astute
Atoned
Not a Government without a clue on wages or money
And not a grey suited Etonion laughing at those without their humour thinking its funny
No;
A new you, a new home, a new bloom
Watch us rise now given the elbow room
Shuffling towards a brand new boom
Imagination isn't just a crazy thought
It's putting together what we have learnt
What we've tripped through
What we've been taught
So let's imagine a better you
Carry on that thought on what we can do
And hold on to that future that really can be true
Don't stop,
Imagine,
Be you.

JJB
Nov 2022 · 157
I Am Pluto
John Bartholomew Nov 2022
Reassigned
Renamed
Revolving still in the same way
Where night is still night and day is still day
I am now seen as a lower grade of pay
For once I stood big but now I am small
From the heights of a man
Oh, how the mighty do fall
Words cannot describe such change in life
You adapt
Quick wit
As sharp as a knife
I like to keep in and be that one-man show
Yes, I am still that guy, that guy you all know
Just watch me change, adapt, succumb
For I am that evolving planet,
I am Pluto.


JJB
Oct 2022 · 109
Double
John Bartholomew Oct 2022
In this world we all have a double
It's you with a growth of designer stubble
Only 2 foot shorter like Barney Rubble
Strutting the scene with a jive and a walk
But unlike you they've got the talk
And being a sworn religeon they wouldnt eat no pork
Do they have the same luck in life like me, I've had none
Or did they take a different path and become a priest or a nun
Maybe they might have robbed a bank and are still on the run
Who knows what we might have done in a time of another
A new life as an imposter acting as twin sister or twin brother
Or always acting as a fraud as life is just a cover
Your double could be the kindest soul but of that we'll never know
Just the luck of the dice in life we throw I suppose
Yet they could just be the rhyming reverse off this,
Not like you,
your double, trouble

JJB
Oct 2022 · 132
Luke Warm (lukewarm)
John Bartholomew Oct 2022
Coldish
Tepid
Slightly warmer than the fridge
Drinking from the garden tap back when we were kids
Can't have been much fun to have gained this world renowned name
For running my hand underneath the tap and pronouncing it all same
Don't touch my flannel and then onto face
Think you'd better call a plumber out if this is always the case
For its not quite hot
And it's not exactly cold
It's that kid who never done what he was told
Unenthusiastic
Indifferent
Slightly heated,
Just the way he was born
Warm
Luke Warm

JJB
Oct 2022 · 111
Life
John Bartholomew Oct 2022
What rhymes with Life?
Not a lot
Strife?
Knife?
Yes, and there it is
It stabs you
Dismembers you in time
Cuts you off from where you want to go in line
Every job I had was wrapped in slippery butter
Just couldnt hold on as I left with an obscene mutter
For I will always try and fail
As forever chasing my own tail
The label I will go by will always be a chancer,
For,
I am sorry my wife, my family, my friends
As I am seriously running out of good answers

JJB

:-(
Oct 2022 · 118
Our Liz
John Bartholomew Oct 2022
Our Liz

I really don’t care if you like Royalty or not,
But our Queen was always too hot to trot
Not a Royalist myself but I still know right from wrong
When I heard her song last play, I knew her time had come
Seventy years doing a job only she knew best
Find me another soul who could take this time, this underserving, Godlike test
From an **** horriblis to her poor husband dying
She kept our spirits high even through lack of trying
When jumping from a plane with 007
You still looked cool and to even outwit your agent from heaven
So, thank you Ma’am as you have been that servant to us all
That you promised us even after just leaving what seemed your time at school
You showed them how, and showed them what, in times of deepest peril
As you will never be replaced
Always the time, always the place
To be our leader in any such haste
For you kept you chin up, kept this ship afloat and never left us in a fizz
As you will always be our Queen, our guide,
Our never forgotten Liz

JJB
#queen
Sep 2022 · 97
Roundabout Living
John Bartholomew Sep 2022
Its not a place for the faint hearted
The joining can be a pig, even the reverse parking
But once on, life is a song
No cold calling in the middle of the night
Not a child screaming in the early hours of the school plight
Rarley a punch up from the pub as no room for a full-blown fight
The postie just raises an eye to the thought of dropping letters
I'll get one over on you and live free in a life that is much better
So the daytime traffic can be heavy if not a touch shameful
Lost 2 dogs in this weird old life and do feel slightly dreadful
Yeah its not the safest of place but it saves me a pretty pennyful
****, who am I kidding, in this tent, from old Wembley market
Should have known better when old rex finally last barked it
The TV signal is a sham as I listen to AHA with Morton Harkett
Best get back to the real world with the rats in the daily doldrums
Can always live a life of freedom between my eardrums
For this was a taster of what really can be out there
As I look again at the stars just sat in my underware
You have to live life without a ****,
a dream of wondering who really cares.

JJB
Sep 2022 · 96
Forty-Three
John Bartholomew Sep 2022
Some ages are well worth waiting for
Eighteen
Teenage dream
Twenty one
A bit more fun
Thirty
Starting to feel the derogatory of staying out and being *****
And then life comes tumbling down into an everyday frown
A ten year thought on what do I do next?
How to avoid the rat race and start myself, be the best
Kids start to appear as your Fridays soon disappear
Dragged into the everyday monotony that we always once feared
You start looking at petrol prices in comparison each other
Knowing its 6 pence cheaper so worth a trip to your brothers
But when you switch them around life was good at Thirty Four
Still managing to give it some on the dancefloor
But that all changes when we hit that number Forty
And then they just roll into an everyday synchronicity
As the days start to become meaningless
You forget what it was like to have that first kiss
And now I dwell on age that must have some hope over its hill
That has purpose, a light, a brand new skill
And I know that cause is my reason to avoid the pub and bar
For that ray of sunshine is my little girl
My one and only,
Clodagh

JJB
Aug 2022 · 110
#JustMe
John Bartholomew Aug 2022
I ain't no runaway from some American bank job
Nor no fisherman famous for his cod
Caught in his Cornish trawler with just nets and no rod
Rumour was I had I'd slept with over a thousand little birds
All making me breakfast in the morning with a slice of lemon curd
But seriously man, I'm just some gimp who's always been a nerd
From books of Harry Potter to even Where's Wally?
A shop for one in Tesco with a half filled trolley
Quick dash to the car on my own, such rain without my brolly
I'm happy living on my own without all your baggage
Holiday for one, a lighter plane to fill, without your **** luggage
With such weight lost, no cakes or thrills, soup just made of cabbage
Tuning my senses for a day without your pain
Its a hard long slog of which we have to sadly retrain
But a belonging I must one day regain
#JustMe

JJB
Jul 2022 · 162
One Last Sunset
John Bartholomew Jul 2022
We sat down and held hands
Looking at the sea stretched out past the land
Laughing at a day gone by
At a life where we didnt have to try
You see, some lives were just supposed to be
Me
You
That sense of we found each other and to just feel free
For this is a time that can never be replaced
No matter how hard you look or mistakenly wrongly chase
Some diesese to try and split this thing apart
As nothing could ever jade our beating hearts
The breeze that blows that most will never get
As I hold you in my arms
That,
One
Last
Sunset

JJB
Jul 2022 · 186
Turkey Teeth
John Bartholomew Jul 2022
So you want to look like a celeb?
Your teeth so bright but not into debt?
Well scrape back the enamal and watch what they can do
For a round trip to Turkey is the quick fix for you,
Waltzing the streets looking like the next Rylan
Still wearing the cheap snides and the push-bike you ride on,
As they scrape back your natural front covers
Stuck on caps to look like the perfect lover
But pre-warned by your annoying sensible brother,
And now it's starting to show its disorder.
No dentist will touch you with what you have left
That money you blew to just look like the best
Now rotton and hanging by a thread,
From that modern shiny smile that could hail down a cab
To looking like you've never had it so bad,
Be careful what you wish for and to mix with rest
Just don't consider anymore, from your eyes down to your breast.
You're beautiful just the way you are
Just get the dentist to scrape that bit off,
I think its a bit of rotton tar!

Turkey Teeth

JJB
#thatceleblook
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