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and every morning when I wake
I see your shadow there
beside me in the bed in which I lay
your scent fills the empty air
I reach out my hand desperately
trying to feel what remains
but there was only coldness
and fear, heartache & pain
every bit of memory consumed
and devoured by time
I could never have lost you
for you were never mine
01.10.11
take me to those troubled seas
you have so gallantly sailed
those high-brick walls you alone have climbed
where others seem to have failed

show me how to create rainbows
pine trees and candy bars
landscapes of silver and gold
even diamonds that look like stars

teach me how to appreciate life
beauty and love
tell me about mermaids and faeries
or even angels up above

for how wise you truly are my fragile one
a lot can be learned from you
in your own little world you have become
an artist with a different point of view

how i wish i could understand
these wonderful things only you can see
but with eyes like mine it's as if i'm blind
and this is all that i can be

but you my child with your poetic soul
the universe that you'll create
will be filled with joy and laughter
and a million reasons to celebrate
A piece I wrote a couple of years back. It's unfortunate that I failed to write down the exact date that it was written. It is for a friend's school project about a mother dealing with her child's autism.
She was a petal. Untouched. Untamed.
She was a beast inside aflame
Half her life she must prove her worth,
Her heart too empty to be considered first.
I wake up each day
That's the start
My mind is in fray
Torn apart

A day of more school
Nothing's new
It's always so cruel
Always blue

I go through classes
Painful dread
Slow as molasses
I am dead

The school day finished
So tired
I feel diminished
Not wired

I get to my house
Why no end
My Mom starts to grouse
Starts to blend

I lay down in bed
No reprieve
The voice in my head
Makes me grieve

I pick up the blade
Hold it close
It has been forbade
Heals my woes

Against the right wrist
It belongs
I cannot resist
No more wrongs

The bright streak of red
Trickles down
Leaves stains on the bed
With a frown

This time no stopping
All the way
Until I'm dropping
No foul play

My parents burst in
Fall to floor
Sobs come from within
Can't take more

Hospital was called
There's no hope
The doctors appalled
Mom can't cope

Everything has changed
No relief
Mom's become deranged
Dad's in grief

Remember you're loved
Through and through
And although you're sad
You'll get through
This is a poem I wrote as I was having a really rough day at school and my mind was in a really dark place. It really helped me to vent my feelings and that's why it got happier at the end!
Leave me be
Faces I no longer want to see
I've been brocken too many times
I have written so many lines
On this life I want to leave behind.
Leave me be
I shout from the top of lungs
leaning over the edge of the copper bridge
I can see things clearer now.
Leave me be!
I scream it this time
so everyone can hear
this life is like the taste of my tears
Salty and sharp.
So stranger, please, just leave me be
I look to the sky and imagine I fly

Look at me now I'm two miles high

Above all the clouds the sky is so blue

I'm soaring and gliding and all of it new

I'm looking at trees, way down below

The air is so thin, light headed I go

I'm falling to Earth, still not a care

I'm higher on Earth, as long as you're there
Read it to someone and she said I should try to  write about sad things?
remember the days of when we were younger
we thirsted from birth and we hunted with hunger
running and laughing under skies of thunder
we were sisters and brothers in a world of wonder
I am on top of the world oh so high
Living without a care or tear in my eye
I am a happy, carefree soul
Who wants nothing more than just to end it all
I stand here now atop of a stool
Noose tied around my neck, Ready to fall
The end is coming, I hold it in my hands
The thought of my death excites me beyond belief
I'm ready to throw away this horrendous life filled with nothing but grief
Here it comes, here I go
My body once filled with warmth has suddenly gone cold
I am now free from my prison
The taste of death bittersweet
My body now hangs from the branch with nothing but earth below my feet
I did it, I won, and I finally prevailed
Or perhaps I made a mistake and instead I had failed
It appears that I had made a decision much too hasty
For this blood in my mouth is no longer tasty
I regret death and now yearn for life
I mistakenly chose darkness when I really wished for light
Now I have nothing left to do but document my mistake
With hopes that it is read so no other soul suffers the same fate
So long world for we are no longer one
My old journey has end and a new one has begun
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