Blurry hazy memories of my life
The hopes and dreams of a little girl

But the image of motherhood shattered
Like my reflection
Broken into a million pieces

My heart is pounding
But it isn't in my chest
I hid it away, a long time ago
In a dark forgotten corner
where no one can harm it

I'm ready to find it

Do you remember Red Ribbons
And the fear the world felt inside
Could AIDS be transferred through vision
Was the air contagious outside

Some said the government made it
Others thought it was god's design
AIDS had infected our spirits
Was the air contagious outside

Was AIDS transmitted by touching
"Don't touch him he's gay and you'll die"
Repugnant minds were erupting
Was the air contagious outside

Do you remember Red Ribbons
Was the air contagious outside

I started wearing Red Ribbons
After hearing my friends tragic tales
Of the worst gifts they'd been given
Entombed in a black mourning veil

Our grandmothers they were best friends
You told me, my god I went stale
Sick with anguish for your grave end
Entombed in a black mourning veil

Once surrounded by many, now few
Your frame morphed from buxom to frail
Love you Joy, I bid you adieu
Entombed in a black mourning veil

I started wearing Red Ribbons
Entombed in a black mourning veil

Am I such a cold cruel creature
Ice the core of all my features
You think my frigid heart not whole
Yes, someone said I have no soul

Some are quick to sling torment
So full of hate and malcontent
Of my essence you've no control
Yes, someone said I have no soul

So on this lonely moonlit night
These frenzied thoughts I won't ignite
Firmly rooted no unpaid toll
Yes, someone said I have no soul

Am I such a cold cruel creature
Yes, someone said I have no soul

My spirit stands upon firm ground
My love for others is unbound
My heart is full my heart is whole
Yes, someone said I have no soul

It's you that I take pity on
Flogging others with your baton
Coldhearted jabs will take their toll
Yes, someone said I have no soul

One harsh day you will glance around
And find your gardens been cut down
Where once stood friends now just a hole
Yes, someone said I have no soul

My spirit stands upon firm ground
Yes, someone said I have no soul

Rich crimson leaves cascade from trees
Embers of fire in the breeze
Luna sails the black sea unseen
Autumnal spell of Halloween

We carve a brood of sculpted gourds
Bake apple pie for all adored
While trick-or-treaters come and leave
Phantasmal dream of Hallows' Eve

Candles burn bright in our window
Ancestors led home by the glow
Our bonfires flames swell with sheen
As shadows dance on Halloween

Let the feast for the dead begin
This spirit night, the veil is thin
Humans and ghosts interweave
The magic realm of Hallows Eve

The clock strikes the Witching Hour
Loved ones graves we bloom in flowers
This spooky Eve of in betweens
The time of rebirth, Halloween

I am drifting black
With a rotten promise of suppressed sorrows
That each breath
Each heartbeat
Every footstep
Delivers me closer to a beast

The foul scent of eucalyptus hangs in the air
Welcoming me to this filthy place
Wind howling as I open the door
A sickening reminder...

As images echo, a monster lies in wait
Hiding under a cloak of normal
But, at the edge of that disguise there is a tiny thread
I tugged it

In the stale air, the disguise deteriorated
Demolishing the monsters power over the innocent
I saw the scars of lives destroyed littered across the face of a predator

And I told...

I walk through walls when I travel
To a midnight blood orange sky
Iridescent raindrops in soft motion
All discerned with my third eye

The astral world is tranquil
But not everything is as it seems
Creatures just heads are hiding
Inside articulated trees

Madly twirl to change the scenery
Watch as fish swim in venetian glass
Jump as high as painted mountain tops
Then rest on undulating grass

Weightless flights to brilliant Luna
Imagination guides the course
The realm of out of body
A thread embroidered to our source

We met in a barn during winter time
It smelled of fresh sawdust
And rain

Moonlight illuminated your face
Shining on your auburn eyes
Open wide with desire

We sat next to the fireplace
Warm and crimson with crackling logs Laughing at our awkward silence

Your artist hands felt like silk
They brushed the hair from my face
Laughter from our friends spilling upstairs
We barely even noticed

I was taught to hide my feelings
To keep the seeds buried deep inside
Where no one can harm them

That winter night
Quietly wrapped in your safe embrace
My feelings began to bloom

We talked all night
Until the wild rooster began to shout
And the barn was enveloped with a garden of wildflowers

When the room began to glitter from the sun shining through the old wavy windows

I knew you were my farmer