Barefoot standing backwards on
the doctor’s scales; the weighing games begin.
I can’t make sense of how or why
I’m here; dragged from my mother’s car,
when only earlier I was dancing
at my ballet class; I slipped and fell
on the cold dance floor, and now
I’m under hospital arrest. All I want
is to escape; because I truly thought
this was all in my past.
But the Devil and God are raging inside me
all the time.
It began with only one pound lost;
a controlled experiment, one I thought
I could win. And now,
I’m barefoot standing backwards
on the doctor’s scales –
There’s only one way; Up!
No spiral down.
I’ve found my way back here, somehow,
and I’ll find my way out of here, somehow.
© Sia Jane
Re-work of an old poem which will be in my upcoming new edition of the LUNA Zine with my collaborating artist Gia D'Arcadia <3