I was doing good,
Maybe great even.
I was smiling,
I was happy,
I had a little fun.

Then you said it.
Said that it destroys,
That it breaks,
And compared it to drugs.

You have never truly been in love.
When in love, it doesn’t break,
It doesn’t destroy,
The high you get
Is incomparable to drugs.

You ruined it.
With those words,
With that comparison,
You have ruined my night.

Are you happy now?
I am sad with you,
I am crying with you.
I feel done, all because of you.

You triggered something
that shouldn’t have been.
You started something
That could’ve been avoided.

I am sad with you,
I am crying alongside you,
I am just as done as you.
So let me ask you this:
Are you happy now?

i've been having dreams,
every one incorporating fire.
whether it be us sitting by the fire,
the flame of a birthday candle,
or the flame lighting the fireworks.

but lately, it seems,
the fires are not as bright.
the fire no longer keeps us warm,
the flame of the birthday candle is blown out,
the flame lights the fireworks putting on a brilliant, beautiful show.

all these are sad at first glance,
but they mean so much more.
after the fire burns out, we go in and go to bed.
after the candle is blown out, the phone is moved from view and the child is smiling with you kissing their head.
after the fireworks go off, we sit there holding hands, about to lean in and kiss on the fourth of july.

fire can be destructive,
it can bring damage that is unrepairable.
fire can be beautiful,
it has so much more meaning than you think.

you light the fire inside of me,
and that is one fire that will never burn out.

lets go back
to the time when it was easy.
to the time when you had your arms around me,
not really caring what our parents were talking about,
only caring that you were hugging me.

lets go back
to the time when it was loving.
to the time when we were walking through the store,
playfully pushing and pulling and shoving,
and having fun while your mom shopped.

lets go back
to the time when we enjoyed it.
to the time when we were watching the movie,
cuddling on the couch,
not paying any attention to the film, only what we were doing.

lets go back
to the time when we were happy.
to the time when we first hung out,
i stole your hoodie and you kissed me,
and then you asked if you could be with me.

lets go back
to the time when we were together.
to the time when what she said about us, didn't matter.
when we could do whatever,
back when we were together.

can we go back?

I finally broke down every wall for You

And you picked up every single stone
Just to throw it back at me.........

sometimes
there are no other words
that will do
no embellishment worthy,
no outpouring of devotion.
sometimes
all i can say is,
i miss you
more than i ever knew
my bones could take.