What if i told you,
That the reason why i date you,
Is to make poems of you?

What if i told you,
That i never truely loved you,
Rather i only needed you?

What if i told you,
I gain inspiration by being with you,
And by breaking up with you?

What if i told you,
I write of the things you do,
And the pains you put me through?

What if i told you,
I expect the heart break from losing you,
It helps me get a better point of view?

So forgive me for ever hurting you,
My poetry always comes before you,
Only her do I trust as really true.

Ambien Angel,
Hallucinate
a halo

to replace
the self-doubt
that you’ve got
wrapped around
your mind

We only talk
at times
of
Swirling
self-destructive
forces

I felt your
distress call
through the ether

Spiraling
down
down
wrapped
in a cloud
of smoke, whiskey
and Bukowski

There you were,
The American Spirit
staring back
from the
Apothic abyss
of red wine
and controlled
prescriptions.

We all
get so alone sometimes
in Tales of Ordinary Madness

It just makes sense
to let another
Siren sing our ships
towards crimson catastrophe

But you handle
the collisions
so gracefully

Looking so
God-**** divine
like your name

This time
Go lightly
and let’s float
away

Calm down, calm down, your voice is raised but it cant get any louder than your beauty.

Calm down, calm down. Drive safe, drive safe, even when done having your fun & you leave I won't hate you, I won't ever see those flaws you see.

Wake up, wake up, no rush for me to wake up, your eyes hold the view of a sunrise that assures you the stories in the bible are true.

I know, I know, it's hard to have an undecided major, to not know where your focus is and on the other side all I'm studying is you.

So true, so true, our angels aren't always with us.

Sometimes, sometimes, it's just a temporary eutopia to answer prayers, It's just a vacation God gives us.

Just please, just please, be clear, be forward, be true.

Remember, remember, I remember your brain's scrambled, your heart hurts, just remember mine does sometimes too.

1348

Lift it—with the Feathers
Not alone we fly—
Launch it—the aquatic
Not the only sea—
Advocate the Azure
To the lower Eyes—
He has obligation
Who has Paradise—

Your voice is my alarm clock
Your scent like salts to bring me back
To another day of conflict,
As I brace for your attack.

The guns are blazing in this fight
It's high noon in this Wild West
But before I have time to load,
You've fired two into my chest.

Trust was lost with innocence,
But you still will play this game.
Only, you can turn it off,
I wish I could do the same.

I finally find a moment of peace,
But you decide that you want more.
I emptied the bench hours ago,
While you just run up the score.

And after all the struggle,
I collapse and close my eyes
On pillows of broken promises,
Blankets quilted out of lies.

I've made this bed I rest in,
Toss and turn throughout the night,
A greater foe, this time myself
As I relive every fight.

The answer to your question is yes...
I will love you.
Now until you’re grey as ash.
I will love you into the future and beyond your past.
Even when passion, pleasure, and pain do not last...our love will be everlasting as the sun and moon.
I'll rise to any occasion and spread warmth within your soul, whilst being dark as the nights sky.
I'll be the knight in your eye.
As the sun and moon...
I will love you as I have since I noticed it first bloom.
The feeling was unnatural to me...but hands against hands, hearts connected and tangled like vines quickly changed my mind in no time.
I will love you even if you aren't mine.
Yes if someone can love you better, they are welcome to try, but I have loved you without bounds or lies.
I will love you with happiness or tears within my eyes.
I will love you because loving you comes as easy as my breath...I do it and do not notice or wonder why.
I will love you now and forever...until the day i die.

Nine years later
Would I rather not have met you?
Seven years later
Would I rather not have fallen in love?
Six years later
Are second chances worth giving?
One year later
Fool me three times and I am a joke

I am not the ghost I thought I was
You are the ghost instead
Ghost that runs in my veins
Ghost that still inhabits my dreams
Ghost I often think about
I need to lay your ghost to rest

Because now you are happy
Now you are whole
I am the one who sulks in darkness and hates their own reflection
I am he who writes about time that passes and love that fades
I am the deathly cliché of a boy who once  loved a girl and now is nothing more than a phantom
What difference is there between the phantom I have become and the ghost you are to me?
Can I exorcise these spirits?
Can my conscious return to solid form?
What chains do I rattle except for those I forged with my own bad timing my own poor choices and my own disillusion?

I must lay your ghost to rest before it kills me
But I can't bring myself to do it
In quiet moments I bridge our past failures to future hopes and my present becomes limbo
I can barely look people in the eye anymore
I avoid it so they can't see that I am never truly there
I made you this ghost in my mind
You and I made me a phantom
You won't forgive me and that's ok
I can't forget you
And I will have to learn
How to make it work
Ghosts are only as real as your willingness to let them into your mind
The door has long been open
And you are always welcome in

The quarrel of the sparrows in the eaves,
The full round moon and the star-laden sky,
And the loud song of the ever-singing leaves,
Had hid away earth's old and weary cry.

And then you came with those red mournful lips,
And with you came the whole of the world's tears,
And all the trouble of her laboring ships,
And all the trouble of her myriad years.

And now the sparrows warring in the eaves,
The curd-pale moon, the white stars in the sky,
And the loud chaunting of the unquiet leaves,
Are shaken with earth's old and weary cry.

Weary with toil, I haste me to my bed,
The dear respose for limbs with travel tirèd;
But then begins a journey in my head
To work my mind, when body’s work’s expirèd.
For then my thoughts, from far where I abide,
Intend a zealous pilgrimage to thee,
And keep my drooping eyelids open wide,
Looking on darkness which the blind do see;
Save that my soul’s imaginary sight
Presents thy shadow to my sightless view,
Which like a jewel, hung in ghastly night,
Makes black night beauteous, and her old face new.
    Lo thus by day my limbs, by night my mind,
    For thee and for myself no quiet find.