My words don't carry the weight that they should

If there was something I could do to make you care I would

But you're so far away and our love will never be

all these things I feared to foresee

I've been waiting for your call skipping stones to the sea

knowing I won't hear back cause there are loves better than me

all these letters don't go the distance to reach you

but i'm so far gone from your life that they don't need to

I feel embarrassed to say that I need you

our lives had to split cause of errors that we all do... you though me so untrue

truthfully I wished to take back all the things I did so crude

the late hours of the morning keep me up with this awful mood

I wonder why you're still always there in my dreams at night

but when I wake up you're never there by morning light

so much can be stolen when we live for ourselves
I can't live this way much It makes life a hell

I'll give all to others and hope for the best
trusting giving to others will end the aching in my chest

some call me modest and selfless and look on with pride
others call me selfish and foolish and see hate in my eyes

whatever they do I hope my actions keep true
because one day I hope I can laugh it off with you

i'll cut off bit by bit of the dreams I have left
cause the things I want for myself seem to be taken by theft

my words fall on deaf ears as if they're pretended
cause so many others left their dreams unattended

I have died.
I have finally surrendered.
It's over.
My soul has been rendered.

Now all I see is dark,
But there is no pain.
It's empty and black,
Depression reigns.

A shell is all that's left,
There's only death inside.
I've cracked.
There's no need to hide.

I feel no fear now.
It's not like anything could hurt.
I'm dead.
This you cannot try to avert.

When this shell will crack,
They'll say I died of suicide.
But that's a pathetic lie,
Because I've been dead long inside.

It's dark and quiet.
It won't go on for much too long.
Suicide will be fun.
Doing it at this point is not wrong.

I have given up.
I say it with no emotion.
This pleasant darkness,
Dims the previous commotion.

It's completely silent.
No more chaos inside.
I like this darkness.
I have died.

It just bursts forth,
The violence of emotion.
It completely incapacitates,
Creating a commotion.

Chaos ensues,
It's blinking from dark to light.
Now you're left to wonder,
Who's the enemy, who to fight.

It'll be easier to hide,
To pretend none of it's real.
Because with this violence,
It's just too much to feel.

You'd rather surrender,
Rather have none of this pain.
But insanity is vicious,
And you've got no one to complain.

This violence is cruel,
The emotional battle is crippling.
You're left breathless,
As the effects are just rippling.

In the midst of this disarray,
You plead to be saved.
But they're blind to the violence,
Their indifference is just depraved.

You feel like you've gone mad,
As the chaos is just raging on,
There's no way to explain it,
So.. you just end up staying silent.