Never learned how to live without this cloud in my head
Got a script for the doctor, tells me how to live
Never wrong, never right, why is everything a fight
All work, no play its the same every day, every day, every day, like its Groundhog Day
Need a break from the monotony its gotten me
Twisted in the head like a knot
About to trip and drop
Spiraling
Never asked for help, now that's a fallacy
Honestly, on my hands and knees for someone listening
But when I look into the sky I start to daydream
Head in the clouds, I make distance from the screams, hiding behind my dreams while I leave them only as dreams its easy to see Why
When we die there might as well be nothing
We can't treat eachother right here
When right here
And now
Is all that really matters

A force of nature, the winds of change
we hope for its benevolence
we mourn its loss
how alive are the trees as they dance
to the whispers of their mother
how alive I feel as you breathe life
within dying dreams
as fierce as revenge
as soft as a kiss
this brisk gale brings us
to the beginning of another end

Today may change tomorrow, but once its gone
tomorrow may only look back in sorrow
that the choices we made were faint and hollow
as we leave this moment, it shall forever follow
like a shadow, dark and lingering
a faded, altered memory
time will wash over the stain
but you will never be the same
twisting... turning in the night
the thought still churning in the mind
of what was and is and could have been
this folly tale that lives within.

It is not obtaining our wants that we desire
It is the chase
It is our right to pursue happiness
Always just out of   reach

When we have what we want
We want more
Never enough, a bluff
Of modesty, honestly
There's just to much
To leave well enough
Alone

You've accomplished your goals
Now what
The moss grows
In the alcoves

Desires thrive
You don't let go
It's only there for a time
What we all know
Nobody makes it out alive

A constant blare
blurring the view
the static sound
a soft hush

it lulls the hope of happiness
a scratching
deep within the mind
shhhhh....

a rapping
inviting me to the other side
where fear and shame are left behind
shhhh....

who am I?
is this what I've become?
an empty husk
of lies and doubt
shhhh....

I wish the static would drown this out
It destroys everything but regret
please forgive me
shhhh....

The sound so staggering
leaves me weary
in time the static is comforting

replacing incredulity
in time it's quite clear to see
the other side was meant for me




shhhh....

Mr. Grey melts my cares away
learn to take the time and say
"I love you"

A true and loyal friend is he
Mr. Grey reveals to me
all that I wish to be
far away
me and my cup of tea

Never asked for more
than what I'm destined for
Maybe that's too much
out of reach and out of touch

Sitting here, sipping on
another day has come and gone
swept away in the monotony
maybe it was never meant to be

Mr. Grey you take the time
to warm my bones and clear my mind
leave me feeling so sublime
until the day when I want more
I'll just sit here by the door...

These shoulders do not cry out
from the weight of the world
they ache in silence
from the weight of my soul

I carry the burden of sympathy
I gnash my teeth
I grin and bear it
all the while you ne're forget

what it must be
to live simplistically
the weight rolls off
and in jubilee you have forgot

the meaning of life
and sacrifice
what once was love
becomes a vice

unburden yourself of expectation
this selflessness nears expiration
furling your brow and struggle for leverage
try as you might the weight is not average

and in your final act of courage
you stand up straight
you carry the weight

because if not you
then who?