My portrait so fine
Teeth made of veins and apple cores
Reeking of steel

Give me a fire to sleep in
I will be nice and warm
With no regrets if I shall die
My ashes with be buried in shattered love and open wounds
Just let me burn so I don't have to live
I have nothing to give

I love that feeling when your frantic with desire
Wanting to climb into the other person to feel them alive
Often that passion does gap and divide
If only that frantic hunger did not die
I would love to always be hungry for the same meal after years of indulgence

An young man in a old mans body
Feeble and broken down
No words I say will get your rest
As you lay still and shallow
I watch you breathe
It is labored even for me
I want to breathe for you
Give you years off my life
Your so cold asleep on that mountain
As you reach up to the heavens
I wonder who you see perhaps your mother
The secrets dance in this room
With marks on your body that you call yours
The devil crawled inside
Ate your core and brought it home
As the devil drinks your flesh
Your bones are dust that have turned to rust

I'm just a grain of sand
That will never be found
A voice that screams and is not heard

Lovers come to taste me
I couldn't let him go  
Naive bruises that I caused
Laying my head down to sleep
I feel my skin breaking
Could we still make love?
I questioned this inside my head
Like an wounded  bird I lay still
I wanted it to all be true
A change for me and you
Reading the newspaper over coffee
When a difference of opinion was just simply that  
You wanted me to love you
It was simple then
No control you left me safely in the nest

We enlighten our essence,
as we constitute our resistance.

When the blood turns white
It drifts through my fingers like grains of sand
Searching for a home I never had
Dirt roads that seem so long
Friends that become unkind
Lovers lost along the way
Desperate measures and pleas
When there is no plan
Rain washes away
With no place to go
The branches of my tree are broken
Can’t hold the burden
Of all that is wrong

Writers block
***** me

A pinwheel of desperation
Birds with leather wings sink into my skin
My suicide toolbox I wear as a party hat
Who decides what we want?
Who extinguishes the fire that burns inside you?
Afraid of touch, nothing to give
Words are weapons screaming at me
I'm living to die, dying to live
Can't catch a full breath
Just don't feel like me, pain obtained
I often wonder do words even come out?
Wrists bleeding, just a frail wallflower
I don't want to talk about it
It has been talked to death
I'm asleep inside my head
Staring at the stars I weep
Take my soul, take my secrets
I'll thrive on sorrow and heartbeats
I can't have anything sharp
Hide the pills she may overdo it again, once again
In the tub the water over my head, begging to drown
I'm found
Tried to end it all, makes me wonder what did I do wrong?
I did not even get a goodbye kiss
I'm in a mental health war
They say talk more
I disassemble my mind
Crying from hunger, sick of habits I can't break

A  wild ray of light runs blue
Wind kissing her *******
The beads of love
Curves of her back
Away in flight
Flowers beneath
I weep on her shoulder
Backwards into sleep

When I was small you French  braided my hair
Watched over me held me tight
When you where beat over nothing at all
I would wait until the end
I wanted to mend your way
The sound of crying eyes
Your puppy shot because Father thought he was in the way
From then on I was alone
My heart was frigid and paralyzed
I never slept or ever spoke the same after that day

Bleeding Blankets
A skeletal spectator
Splintered, ripped, fractured
What is the definition of consent?
What is the definition of countless?

Ordinary life
Sleepwalking born a ghost
Flickering faces may strike, but don't burn down
Razors in my throat
Stars don't shine
Cover me just for the night

Daddy issues is not a kink
Every time you are down on me I never forget a thing
I didn't want you as my first love nor as my last
I became your little girl
Doing what is right for you
If you go Daddy what will I do?

Hemmed galaxies wither in my hip pocket flap
Starlight angst feeling alive for the first time
Whiskey feeble,chain smoking all night through
Tearing through pages of a magazine
Thought we where immortal
I still want you
We where so wrong

Keep me at home
Swallow all my thoughts away
Watch my mind disappear
Keep my hands busy so I don't slash my face apart

I wish I could just stop breathing

Addiction is not wiser than me
I'm functional I have some control
Quit shoving meetings down my throat
I don't hate myself, or speak to God
Chewing patches, puking blood
Sheets wet with sweat
My ******* enemy eating away my face
Needle is dull, need my hell dust

Filling cups with generations of pain,
Refusing to drink it anymore
Segregation, deprivation, invasion
I'm barely breathing
Scrap me from this earth
As I taste it

My sock monkey in my arms
Still have sand in my  bathing suit
I see red but  not sure from where
I try and bury myself ,but I can't hide
The waves today were the ones I wanted to carry me away

A hankering  to be stung
My rib cage is the opening to the chapel doors
A beautiful blue corpse come hug me with your eyes
Willow branch teeth ,dreaming the moon is soft
A rebirth of midnight a sourvenier to keep

Drowning in small town talk
Coming undone in everyone else's eyes
With paper cuts on my mind

My ribs,a trap door to my mind
Woven weakness's, cage my hope
Bones of men fight the sunlight
I kissed the moon with cracked teeth
Comets weeping, undone
Snow drops,a psychedelic Violin
Swimming home in a cosmic orb

If I caught the sun
I would give it to you
Let you hold it see the light
If I had the moon
I would share the shine
If I

Unspoken sorrows tangling the language of blood
Collar bones hollow in the whispers of  my lungs
Vocal cords made of linen afloat

I would give you my wings if they would help you fly
In your darkest hour
I will whisper your name
Covered in shades that only we knew
This may be the link to your release
Needing you as the wind grazes your blues
If I had words that could make you belong
They would be long
As I stay here with you

I gorge on the river bend
The liquid bones are opened wide  
I wear my skin to tight
Driving with a fork and knife in my hand
I smell hunger

Moisten and pucker as the world curls  
Murky images appear
Fibers of smoky leather lingers
Painting my hair with the earth
Chasing the days away

The freight train puts me to sleep
As hollow hands with closed fists fight
Lights cutting the sky
Sleepwalking through life
Poetry is my birthmark
My heart on my sleeve
Wrapped in flames in the distant city
Gypsy whiskey etching freckles across your face
Shadows grasping at my faith, stealing my breath away
Whispering screams settling me in

I'm waiting desperately
To have a human connection with life

Mother peace on this fearsome journey
To the light as the moon stirs
Hidden truths in life and self
The pathway of rites and symbols
Connecting with the earth
Drawing strength looking for growth

My journey went astray

A eidolic intuition rummaged through my mind
As they placed the coffin in the living room
The limestone awaited to be inscribed
Let the North wind carry me away
As you visit me in a darkened room

Swimming eyelids,  fracture my sleep

People call me Crazy
I reply lonesome bones

Prisoner of fire and bloodbath fevers
With mouthfuls of bourbon and trembling convictions  
A lovers gaze upon her midnight *******
Wandering through starlight fields  
A womb of silence holding the recipe to my tears

Hide me in the sea
I will crawl out of my skin,  so I can finally breathe

Flowers of ink
In the heart of your ears
Fair hair that runs blue
Pierced with light
Sweet madness in the wine of daylight
On a worlds journey
Beads of love in the curve of her back
I sink into her flesh
Aching for touch
The mouth of arousal  is hypnotizing
The softness of her tongue awakens me
Flicking the head of my manhood
Her lips and tongue trail up and down
I'm floating away
As she indulges all of me
Its electric as I shudder and moan
I want to erupt into her eager mouth
I'm swelling as she gasps for air
Thrusting I empty
She says I taste sweet
I'm over come with intensity
Caressing and sweeping  
She tastes like sugar and wine  
Savoring the flavor
Her hips rise and fall
Groaning she began to tremble
I tip and curl around her pearl
Your  fingers enter me
I'm weak and powerless
I brace myself as I spurt my juice
We lay still spilling passion

Touch has a memory

Sea pearls in my frail hands
Strawberry gold in my glass coffin
Champagne with still sparkle
A sweet love will exist
Obscure graffiti will continue to paint firefly nights
My stained glass eyes would soon be forgotten
Neon ghosts would speak out loud
Wild flowers and moon shadows
Frosty nights, sugar wildflower carnivals with still have rides
Magnolias will shimmer with pride
Some may bleed and go slowly
Watercolors of purple ice will waltz with the honey flies
The winds will bellow with urgency
Draw the curtains of the dark hued winds  
A dusk house of earths yarn
Hanging on by fingertips does not slow the *****
The fog straggles will push and pull
Our stories will remain on the walls
Its not the years its what is left behind
Where all so much more than we know
When that strength begins to fog  
Crackling flowers will adequately grow
Earth will yawn with a calling to come home
So many secrets we are frankly to tired to spill
At times the sweetness and zest is excused
Forest rose shells await
A true beauty of life is found
Death does not strip away your spirit
Honey dew smells invade your nose
Star filled nights may feel like stones in your throat
I see slices of you in the pane of my own essence
I will shield you as you retreat  into the dimness

Look at what you made me do
My fist just happened to hit your face
I control you because I care
This is how I grow up I didn't know
You know that sets me off
I was just having a bad day
It won't happen again
She don't  know when to shut up
How could I think so low of myself
Because every time I began to rise you kicked me down

Misunderstandings and Perceptions
She must like it or she would leave
Why does she stay?
It's easy to leave

Excuses we make for him
I don't have a job
I know he loves me
It was my fault I made him mad
The children need mom and dad
Alcohol made him  do it
She provoked me
I didn't mean to hurt her famous last words spoken at my coffin

I hate you
Please don't leave me