I typed the first line and it didn't come out write
*******, how do I even begin to right
This wasn't intentional
It was just my subliminal
Telling me, "Hey you drank to much last night!"

The first 2 lines were meant to be that way
Hangovers can fun, especially with wordplay 
For once in my life, I left my typos untouched
And here's the story about how I drank too much

We started at home with a bottle of wine
Shared between the four of us, we were feeling fine
We got to the car
We didn't go to a bar
Instead we went to a friend of mine

His place was close, about 15 minutes away,
As soon as we got there, we were like "Heeeeyyyy!!"
We played a drinking game, called 'ride a bus'
And soon enough, I felt like I was on an actual bus

My head started to spin, my chest felt heavy
I hurried to the bathroom feeling very dizzy
I looked into the mirror
I felt this glooming fear
I thought to myself, "Oh ****, come out already"

And out it came, the wine from before
Just when I thought it was over, and then came more
The punishment I get, for not eating before I drink
Is hurling up everything into the sink

So cleaned myself up, and the sink as well
I wobbled around, I think I almost fell
Someone asked me, "Did you throw up?"
I don't remember who, but I was like... "YUP!"

We got to the car, and reached home safely
I crawled into bed, and I slept like a baby
I woke up this morning, 6.30am, actually
I cleaned up the car, where I threw up unintentionally

Thanks for the party guys, I had a blast
And surely enough, it won't be our last
The next time we drink
Or when our glasses clink
I'll make sure I don't drink it too fast

There was a man who wanted a lady
But he didn't want one who is all ******
He thought and pondered
Which one, he wondered
Would be a good fit for me?

Does it take a pretty lassie
To make him call her honey
Or perhaps eyes that are dreamy
To cool him down when he's angry

Maybe a body shaped like a coke bottle
Can make him feel civil and humble
Or does it take a complete *****
To make his heart feel at war

Maybe it takes a total *****
Which chains he'd want to yank
Or perhaps a fuller figure
That might pull his trigger

Does it take a lass who seemed sweet
But turns out, she's a freak in the sheets?
Or maybe he needs a total fox
Whose drinks are always on the rocks

Maybe it takes ample *****
To make him wanna have a *******
Or perhaps a woman with class
Who also has a nice ****

At the end of the day
There's nothing left to say
When the time comes
He'll know to whom he belongs