You held my hand but chose to love her
Maybe my grip wasn't strong enough to make you stay

Perhaps in another life
I will not be staring at the moon
Whispering things I should have told you
Or beg you to stay

But instead I will be
Lying cozily in your arms
And I'll be the one answering
Instead of the one asking

"I'm back"

Standing on the door, uninvited. I don't know how he found out where I hid the keys.

"You think you can get rid of me? I'll always be a part of you."

I couldn't move.

"You can't **** me unless you **** yourself"*

A sly smirk painted on his mouth. Next thing I know, I was in his arms again.

I told you that I didn't want to be hurt again
I told that I wanted years not months
You didn't listen and still hurt me
You decided for months instead of years
Now I sit in my dark bedroom during midnight
Now I sit there and cry myself to sleep
How did I not see that it would end soon
How did I not care to notice you didn't like this
Where can I go to find happiness again
Where do I go to have trust again
No where is good enough for me
Not my family or my friends
I know that when I speak to you I am happy
I know that my depression worsens after I start talking to you
But I can't seem to stay away from you
I try and force myself away but it isn't enough
Now my heart feels like it is being shredded in the center
Now I feel broken pieces in the core
But you just laugh it away and make up excuses
But I have to keep seeing you
You call me friend which is what you want
You never thought to ask what I want
Every time you call me Friend
Every time my heart is being stabbed by pain
Now I am here crying away
Now I am here failing apart
Because of you and your words
Because I had fallen for you and can't get up.