Twirling and leaping,
softly across the floor.
Hands raised up and
spread out wide
like the wings of a bird.
She performs a dance of worship
for her Lord.
"This is for You, Jesus," she whispers,
just as the music begins.
She prays that it will delight His heart
to watch her dance.
For it is her gift to Him tonight.
To dance on the wings of praise.
With passion in every step she takes,
and joy in every move she makes.

Sunrise.
Pink, yellow, orange, and blue.
Lights up the sky.
With brilliant hue.
Glorious! Glorious!
Through her car window.
Then a deer...
So majestic.
With graceful legs and strong antlers.
Leaps across the plain.
By the side of the road.
So majestic.
So beautiful.
So triumphant.
Glorious!  Glorious!

She is reminded of Truth.
Which pours forth from her lips.
"I shall leap like a hart,
upon my high places.
I shall gallop like a deer,
upon every difficult hill.
Upon every difficult trial.
Yes!
I shall leap like the beautiful deer.
He showed me along my way.
With His Spirit within me.
I can claim victory."

Mother mallard.
Keeps watch.
Over her almost grown young.
At rest.
But then,
after a time,
she waddles away from them.
And goes for a swim.
In the peaceful pond.
She has no worry.
No fear for her young.
She somehow knows.
That their Creator.
Is watching over them.
She somehow knows.
That they are in His hands.


"Yes, Lord, I'm listening."

How I want you to know how much He loves you,
but I cannot convince you it's true.
How I want you to know that you are forgiven
and can have a new life,
but I cannot make you see that sin causes strife.
How I would like to be the one who leads you to Him,
to pray the prayer that will be the new beginning.
For you.
Perhaps I am not the final link in the chain of souls
who brings you to God.
Perhaps it is someone else down your life's road.
But I thank the Lord that I can be a link in the chain.

Quiet summer night.
Sitting beneath the moon so bright.
Grey-blue clouds slowly dance.
Over the lesser light.
Trees in silhouette black.
No wind in sight.

Quiet beauty.
Quiet heart.
Quiet summer night.

Quiet Presence.
Of God.

Quiet Love.

Quiet.
Awe.

Face to face now with reality,
I see that all you were was a fantasy.
And that you and I were never meant to be.
The reality has hit me hard,
and I wonder now if you ever cared.
I got so caught up in the fantasy,
of you and me.
And my imagination's folly.
That I did not see clearly.
For did I ever really know you?
And did you really love me enough to know me?
All you were was a fantasy.
A figment of my imagination.
All we were was a fantasy.
But the story's over now.
The end.

Lover of my soul,
You fill every longing of my heart.
Eternal Husband,
You are faithful and true.
Shepherd of my heart,
You are safe and You are strong.
Oh, how I love You!
You are my Fountain of Living Waters.
I thirst no more.
Your voice whispers to me,
words of life and healing.
You change me from a cowering fool,
into a hart with hinds' feet.
Able to leap upon my high places.
Of difficulty and trial.
You draw me with cords of love.
You romance my soul.
You bind me to Your heart
with bands unbreakable.
My Shepherd and King,
I desire You more than anything!
I want nothing.
I want no one.
To ever come between us again.
I honour You.
I love You.
I worship You.
You are my Greatest Treasure.
And there is no other.
Worthless idols,
be gone from me!
O Shepherd of my soul,
You have set me free.
I set You before me.
Continually.
And in You I've found.
My identity.
For You speak over me,
that I am no longer called
"Much-Afraid."
My new name now.
Is...
"Grace and Glory."

When I am sinking in the floods of grief.
My only Anchor.
Is You.

I shake off the chains of the past.
At last.
I look forward.
To what lies ahead.
New life.
New time.
New journey of discovery.
Of ministry.

New discovery.
New Year.
Of finding out more
of who He is.
And why He laid hold of me.

I lay my head against His chest.
Safe in His embrace.
And then take His hand.
As together we walk.
Into the future.
Into.
A New Year.

Lord, teach me how to love them.
Without molding them into my god.
And facing then...
the consequence.
The loss.
Of what could have been.
A beautiful bond.

Teach me how to love them.
Without expecting them to fill
my void.
For only You can quench my thirst.
Oh teach me, Lord, to put You first.
That I might learn to truly love.
And be loved.
In return.

Sweet voices of children
echo through the sanctuary.
Tiny hands shake silver bells,
as the room is full of parents' smiles.
Children singing songs of Christmas cheer.
"Away in a manger."
Is heard loud and clear.
Children's voices,
like the voices of angels.
Float up to God above.
As He smiles down upon them.
For each child He dearly loves.
Sweet voices.
Angel voices.
Of little children.
Echo through the sanctuary.
At Christmastime.
What a gift it is.
To all who hear them.
Angel Voices.

From the glorious riches of His Heavenly home.
He came down.
To walk among.
Frail man.
For Love,
He came.
To a dark, cold stable,
He came.
Born among the animals.
Laid in a hay-filled feeding box.
As a wee babe.
He came.
In humility.
In frail humanity.
He lowered Himself.
For Love.
Then...
was mocked.
Scorned.
Rejected.
By frail, sinful man.
Nailed to a cruel cross.
A sinner's sentence.
For Love.
He came.
In humility.
In frail humanity.
He lowered Himself.
For Love.
He laid aside His glorious Kingly crown,
and put on the crown of suffering.
The crown of thorns.
The crown...
of a servant.
For Love.
He came.
In humility.
In frail humanity.
He lowered Himself.
For Love.
My soul awakens.
To this life-giving Truth...
It is when I lower myself
and become a servant.
That I resemble Jesus most.
For it is only when I wear
a Servant's Crown,
that true joy can be found.

I would rather cry.
I would rather feel the pain
of a broken heart.
Than feel nothing at all.
For at least I know
that I have loved.
And it is far greater,
far better,
to have loved
and experience loss,
than never to have loved
at all.

Mary....
how did it feel,
when the Spirit of God overshadowed you?
And God within you began to grow?

Joseph...
how was it to know
you must raise the Son of God,
not your own flesh and blood?
Were you afraid to fail,
as so great a task before you stood?

Shepherds...
how did you feel when you saw
Heaven opened in glorious, blinding Light,
with myriads of angels
singing in the night?
Did it fill you with fright?

Wise men...
how was it to travel
through dust storm, heat, and cold,
mile after mile,
following the Star
wherever God would lead?

Donkey...
how did it feel to carry the mother of God
upon your back so broad?
How did it feel to watch Him laid in a manger bed?
So humble.
So small.
So mild.

How did it feel for all of you who witnessed
His humble, yet glorious birth?
Were you filled with awe and wonder?
At the meek beauty of the King of Kings,
born in a stable?
Did you bow before Him in reverence,
and worship Him?
For He who was laid in a manger bed of wood,
will later die for you upon a Cross, so crude.

This Child you look upon
is the Saviour of everyone.
So yes....
Gaze.
Look upon Him.
With awe and wonder.
The Son of God in a manger.
The Son of God.
Your Saviour.

My home is on a beautiful planet.
Of blue and green.
Seen from space,
It is breathtaking.
Fragile.
Beautiful.
Endangered.
Threatened.
Very precious to the heart of God.
Who created it all.
With the breath of His mouth.
And the Word of His power.

Beautiful blue-green planet.
So dear to the heart of God.
With those He loves dwelling upon it.
Every creature deeply cherished.
By its Creator.

He who sits above the circle of our
blue-green planet,
holds it in His sovereign hands.
For it is He who holds
all dominion,
all authority,
all control.
Over
our
beautiful,
fragile,
Blue-Green Planet.

Half of the morning sky holds the night,
as the moon in the semi-darkness still gives its light.
But on the other side of the heavens,
dawn is awakening.
With a glorious pink and orange sunrise.
What a delight to my eyes!
Night and day in the same sky.
Coexisting.
For all to see.
Darkness and light are sharing the canopy.
Just as trials of life can be bittersweet.
The darkness of grief.
And the light of joy and peace incomprehensible.
Existing at the same time.
Colliding each day within the same heart.
The night of loss,
and the day of freedom.
Coexisting.
The darkness of loneliness and regret,
and the light of God's love
and never-ending Presence.
Bittersweet.
The bittersweetness of trials and suffering.
In this temporal life.
Indeed no one escapes them.
Bittersweet.
There is beauty.
Beauty in this.
Like the winter moon in the dark,
and the sunrise awakening the dawn.
Coexisting.
In the same sky.
At the same time.
Creating a beautiful coexistence.

(edited)

Don't let go of me,
lest I be swallowed up by the waves.
Don't be silent to me,
lest I be among those who go down to the grave.
Don't take Your eyes off of me,
lest I waste away from grief.
From Your care, O Lord, grant me no release.
Lest I, from fear's grip,
find no peace.
Be not far away from me, dear Lord,
lest my soul never find healing,
and be forever scarred.
Don't let go of me.
O, speak to me, God.
Speak to me.
For my very life hangs upon Your Word.
Be not silent.
Be not silent.
Lest my soul within me perish from a slow death.
Be not far from me, dear Lord.

Jesus.
Lover of my soul.
Teach me to run
into Your arms.
Teach me to come to You.
And never let go.
Let me not be as
the horse or the mule.
Who need bit and bridle.
Or they will never come near.
Break me, Lord.
Of my stubborn, wayward,
idolatrous ways.
Let me love You enough
that my heart breaks
at the mere thought.
Of causing You grief.
Oh, may the thought
of that
bring me to my knees.
May it cause me to turn
from my rebellious ways.

Make me willing to come
to You, Jesus.
And run far away from rival lovers.
Let it not take You thrusting
the bridle of discipline on me.
For me to choose the path of life.
May every broken cistern I hew out.
Leave me so thirsty.
That I will more.
And more.
Come near.
To Thee.

He wears a shell of black armour over his chest.
Over his heart.
To self-protect.
Afraid to be hurt.
Afraid to let anyone in.
Not wanting to be wounded...
again.
Not wanting to be vulnerable.
For the last time he was...
it was a disaster.
She tries to hold him close,
putting her arms around
his cold black shell.
He responds only with a hard smile.
And won't let her get closer.
Won't let her touch his heart.
But...
she is determined to love him.
Her love is bold.

Over many days,
many months,
many years.
She continues to love.
Until finally,
the black armour over his heart
begins to dissolve.
Slowly, magically,
dents appear,
then cracks,
then holes.
Pieces break off,
at first only small.
And then...
larger and larger do they fall.
Away from his heart.
Until at last...
exposed and vulnerable,
he lets love in.
And learns how to love her.
In return.

So many boxes.
Of temporal treasures.
I pack them.
I wrap item after item.
To place in.
Box after box.
Of temporal treasures.
To be relocated.
To a new, temporal palace.
A smaller palace.
A humbler palace.
A palace where I will boldly confess...
"As for me and my house,
we will serve the Lord." (Joshua 24:15)

So many boxes.
Of temporal treasures.
Which cannot satisfy.
But leave the heart empty.
Box after brown box.
Small, medium, large.
To be relocated.
To a new, temporal palace.
A house for His glory.
For I am finished.
With setting my affections upon...
Box after box.
Of temporal treasures.
Which cannot satisfy.
But leave the heart empty.
I will seek my treasure in eternity.
In things above.
Which will never pass away.

So many boxes.
Of temporal treasures.
To be relocated.
To a new, temporal palace.
While awaiting me stands.
A mansion in glory.

Break into my frozen heart, Lord.
And melt it with Your love.
Break down my protective walls,
like bars of iron.
And capture my soul
with Your mercy.
Sweep me up in Your arms,
with passion and fury.
In the unrelenting love
of a Lover for His Beloved.
That I may no longer resist You.
Lord, I ask You,
I give You permission.
To break and enter
into my inmost being.
And utterly transform me.
For my freedom.
For Your glory.

I breathe out anger and fear.
The breath of death.

I breathe in rest and freedom.
The breath of Life.

From the Life-giving God.
Who holds it all together.

Who holds.

My every.

Breath.

Lord, You are my Candle in the dark.
When the loneliness and despair
grips hold of me.
When the darkness of this trial is all that I see.
You are my Light.
I will hold my Candle in the dark.
And from Your Presence,
I will not depart.

Can you hear the voice of God?
Can you hear Him?
Whispering through the tall trees.

Can you hear the voice of God?
Can you hear Him?
Calling through the sweet song
of the chickadee.

Can you hear the voice of God?
Can you hear Him?
In the hushed silence of a
clear night sky full of stars.

Can you hear the voice of God?
Can you hear Him?
In the quiet flapping of a butterfly's
gentle wings.

Can you hear the voice of God?
Can you hear Him?
In the lazy hum of the honeybee's
flight,
as she ascends and descends upon
blossoms in summer's radiant light.

Can you hear the voice of God?
Can you hear Him?
In the lion's mighty roar.
Can you hear Him?
In the waves of the sea which
crash upon the shore.

Can you hear the voice of God?
Calling out to your inmost soul.
Saying,
"Come to Me,
  come and rest.
  Receive forgiveness.
  Let My love heal you.
  Open the door of your heart to
  Me .
  For I stand at the door and knock."

Can you hear the voice of God?
O weary traveller upon life's way.
He longs to comfort you in His Love.
And chase your fears away.

Can you hear?
Can you hear?
Will you say,
"Speak Lord, I'm listening."
For then...
You will hear.
The voice of God.

Carry me, Holy Spirit Wind.
I know not which way to take now.
Where to begin.
Again.

Carry me, Holy Spirit Wind.
Leaving what I've lost behind,
I am ready to be carried into Your will.
Lost souls to mend.
Even as You mend.
Mine.

Carry me, Holy Spirit Wind.
I am Yours forever now.
There is no other way to Life, to peace,
than to let You carry me.
Into the new.
Unknown.
Into the Higher plain.
My Heavenly calling.
Until You come.
To reign.
Please reign in me, O Holy One!

Carry me, Holy Spirit Wind.
******* where You wish.
Kiss me.
With Your Holiness.

Carry me, oh carry me.
Holy Spirit Wind.

She has been blessed.
With many friends.
Faithful friends.
Faith-filled friends.
Followers of Him.
They fellowship together.
In prayer and
the reading of the Word.
She is filled with gratitude.
But also remembers.
There is only One friend.
Who "sticks closer than a brother." (Prov. 18:24)
And He alone holds the key to her heart.
Forever.
For He is always.
Always.
There.

Darkness becomes Light,
when Christ is within my sight.
Fear is transformed into faith,
when I see He is powerful and great.
Bitterness evaporates,
making way for forgiveness,
when I consider my Lord's words
as He hung on the Cross...
"Father, forgive them..."

Weakness converts to confident strength,
as I abide in His love...
its depth and its length.
Complaint is silenced,
and gratitude is hammered into my soul,
as I see more of the only One
who can make me whole.

Jesus.
Jesus.
You turn my sorrow into joy and singing,
as I realize I am complete in You.
Oh, Lover of my soul,
who is faithful
and true.

Lord, how can I come to You...
when I feel so ugly inside?
How can I draw near to Your Throne...
when I keep remembering my sins?
Every.
Single.
One.
How do I dare approach You
in Your Holiness...
when I feel like such a mess?
Lord, how can I come to You?
When I fall so short of what I ought to be.
How can I---
"Shhh...my dear child.
You can come because it's all been covered.
By Me."

The smiles of children.
Brighten my world.
And just for that moment.
My fears are stilled.
And my sorrows drift away.
Like
a
dark
cloud.
Unveiling the sun.
Through the smiles of children.
Who brighten my world.

(edited)

The trees shed their leaves.
Gracefully they fall.
Dying.
Dying.
Returning to the earth.
With autumn comes death.
And beauty.
Death and beauty.
Is there beauty even in death?
Death to self.
Death to every way in me that has brought grief.
Death which ends the struggle.
Between dark and light.
Between wrong and right.
With autumn comes death.
And beauty.
Breathtaking beauty.
And death.
Death to self.
Bringing life.
And freedom.
Bringing the promise...
of Spring.

I want to go deeper with You,
but I am afraid.
Will You really receive me with love,
when I fall so short of Your glory?
Do I dare to go deeper,
do I dare venture closer,
when You are so mighty and powerful?
When You are so Holy,
and Your eyes flash with fire?
And I am merely a flawed, fearful,
and troubled soul?

I want to go deeper,
but I am afraid.
Too often I stay on the shore,
instead of stepping into the wave.
I turn away from the cloud
of Your Presence,
and go my own way.
But, Lord, I am tired of this timid walk with You.
This fear of going
deeper still.
Oh, take my trembling hand
and be gentle with me, I pray.
Take me deeper into You.
And let me stay.
Show me Your great love for me,
and teach me Your ways.

Deeper.
Take me deeper, Lord.
That Your perfect love
may cast out all my fear.
And then I will stay with You.
Forever near.
Take me
deeper.

(edited)

From the worries of this world and ungodly fear.
O Lord, deliver me.

From the pursuit of riches and the lust for more.
O Lord, deliver me.

From the fear of man and the desire for recognition.
O Lord, deliver me.

From my own way, my own will, my own comfort.
O Lord, deliver me.

Teach me, O God,
the fear of Thee.
That I might bear fruit.
For eternity.