Dana Taylor: Favorites

Aug 2014 Dana Taylor

Anorexia

Aug 2014 Dana Taylor

Tom Babiasz

Anorexia

Can't feed my body, can't feed my mind.
I know you're right, but I will not eat.
Cram me with your ideas, but the knowledge of the truth escapes you.
I cannot feed off of your lies, therefore I starve.
The empty calories of deceit tear at me so I cannot swallow.
I seek the nourishment to fill my body, stick to my soul.
Yet, I am left abandoned, withering in displaced blame.
For, it is not that I refuse to eat, it is You who refuses to feed me with what I require, for what I quest.
My thirst cannot be quenched by some sugar coated incantation.
It must be supplied with the nourishment of reality.
So as I heave at the garbage that is set forth to me, I continue on my journey for enlightenment.
I shall be tagged anorexic, but it is only my hunger that needs to be fed, forgetting what the truth tastes like.

Even when obvious, we only get fed lies, even when the answers are obvious or simple.

Jul 2014 Dana Taylor

The Addict

Jul 2014 Dana Taylor

Anne Sexton

The Addict

Sleepmonger,
deathmonger,
with capsules in my palms each night,
eight at a time from sweet pharmaceutical bottles
I make arrangements for a pint-sized journey.
I'm the queen of this condition.
I'm an expert on making the trip
and now they say I'm an addict.
Now they ask why.
WHY!

Don't they know that I promised to die!
I'm keeping in practice.
I'm merely staying in shape.
The pills are a mother, but better,
every color and as good as sour *****.
I'm on a diet from death.

Yes, I admit
it has gotten to be a bit of a habit-
blows eight at a time, socked in the eye,
hauled away by the pink, the orange,
the green and the white goodnights.
I'm becoming something of a chemical
mixture.
that's it!

My supply
of tablets
has got to last for years and years.
I like them more than I like me.
It's a kind of marriage.
It's a kind of war where I plant bombs inside
of myself.

Yes
I try
to **** myself in small amounts,
an innocuous occupatin.
Actually I'm hung up on it.
But remember I don't make too much noise.
And frankly no one has to lug me out
and I don't stand there in my winding sheet.
I'm a little buttercup in my yellow nightie
eating my eight loaves in a row
and in a certain order as in
the laying on of hands
or the black sacrament.

It's a ceremony
but like any other sport
it's full of rules.
It's like a musical tennis match where
my mouth keeps catching the ball.
Then I lie on; my altar
elevated by the eight chemical kisses.

What a lay me down this is
with two pink, two orange,
two green, two white goodnights.
Fee-fi-fo-fum-
Now I'm borrowed.
Now I'm numb.

Jul 2014 Dana Taylor

You Are the Only Thing You've Ever Taken From Me

Jul 2014 Dana Taylor

RMatheson

You Are the Only Thing You've Ever Taken From Me

If you'd only let me,
I would give you back every moment
of happiness you feel we lost together,
and all the lost potential,
tossed away by the harm
of our addictions.

I would.

Would you give me back
the one and only thing
I would ever say you took from me,
if you could?

May 2014 Dana Taylor

There's nothing I won't do for you.

May 2014 Dana Taylor

Kristen

There's nothing I won't do for you.

There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you,
And nothing you would for me
.
Few things change my affections,
And little things alter yours
.
There is nothing I ask of you,
But everything you expected of me
.
Persistence is my key to dedication,
And touching is the key to yours
.
All I needed was you to exist,
Yet you asked me to exit
.
I will always understand you,
But you never have or will.

May 2014 Dana Taylor

How To Forget Him

May 2014 Dana Taylor

sempiternal

How To Forget Him

Stop trying to remember his scent, he smelled like summer and reminds you of the time he made you laugh so hard, you snorted out milk on that dead, hazy day.

2. Don't waste your day trying to decipher what colour his eyes were, it'll only remind you of the galaxies and constellations that you once saw in his eyes

3. Stop trying to retrace the shape of his mouth in the middle of the night, you'll choke on your tongue trying to taste the mint he devoured seconds before pulling you in for a kiss

4. Stop reliving the times you clasped hands together, the glass plate will fall off your trembling hands.

5. Burn this list, admit that the galaxies and constellations shining in his eyes were wilted, the one in yours are bursting with fire. Remember on the dead, hazy day his laugh sounded like nails running down a chalkboard. Remember when you kissed, the weeds growing from his mouth entangled the roses blooming in yours.

Realize that one day, another boy is going to come and plant daisies where he left behind thorns.

May 2014 Dana Taylor

pills

May 2014 Dana Taylor

jensen

pills

i took too many pills so maybe when im at the hospital they will pump you out of my system and i can finally be at peace

its been five months but i still feel as empty as i did that night

#love #heartbreak #suicide #sad #pills #pain #sadness #death #dead #dark #ache

May 2014 Dana Taylor

To The Girl I Didn’t Know Existed:

May 2014 Dana Taylor

RILEY

To The Girl I Didn’t Know Existed:

She approached me
Tiptoeing from across the room,
Although no one was asleep around us to wake;
I watched her lower lip bleed
From biting too much,
As she deciphers the DNA codes on her hair
With her fingertips,
Stroking the life out of it
Up and down-
And up and down again.
She said don’t get me wrong
But I found myself;
I found myself lurking underneath the light of your words
Bending with your o’s and standing straight with your I’s,
Because I
Got lost;
I got lost in the stories you wrote
About the girls who broke
And they felt just like me-
Dazed
By the love poems you cried down for her,
And I wondered how beautiful she must be.
I got flustered
In the blank spaces
That you chose not to write in,
And it felt like I should cut parts of myself
And add them in the vacancies
But I just don’t know what to add.
For every time I rest my soul
On the tip of a pen
I feel like I’ve said too much,
And every time I scratch my words
Throw away my being
Behind
Unread books and dusty light stands
I believe I haven’t said enough
For I could give more,
Be more,
If only I could start over,
And you
You seem to know me more than I know myself;
You have built bridges
Out of my paper shreds,
Tunnels out of my unexpressed thoughts-
You have created your haven inside my brains
And settled down in my heart.
You’ve managed to make me chew your words
Like breakfast
Was a poetic meal to be served
At all times of the day;
You’re an image,
I re-create you in my mind
Before I sleep
After asleep
And even during I sleep-
The thoughts of you never quit my head
Like a gamer would never quit
A game of Warcraft
In the midst of hunting season”
She took off her glasses,
And I could see the marks of them
Being there for too long.
She closes her eyes
As if she was about to take a leap of faith,
But instead she leaped two steps into my arms
And that was when
I got to ask her
What her name was.
And that was when I realized
It didn’t even matter.

— The End —