Looking in your eyes
Tells me something's wrong
Never began to realize
You've neglected for so long.

It seems you're never there
You never really try
And every time I want to be with you
You make up stupid lies.

I feel as if
I'm just your friend
That you hate being around
So don't pretend

Don't say you love me
With that dreadful tone
It doesn't make sense
Why you never answer your phone

I feel like you're dead
Because you're never there
You're dead to me
How is that fair

Do you ever cry over me?
Do you ever stop and wonder?
About how I am doing
You're just a silent thunder

So now when you need me
I hope you know I won't be here
I hope one day you read this
And it brings a world of fear

I don't want your hugs
And fake understanding

I'm sorry,
But I gotta say
I'll always love you
But never look my way!

Thoughts roll through my head like an old tape, I have to breath deeply for my own sake. I think back to last year when I was content and thought things were going fine, now coming to know I wasted all my time. I dread writing these things, there's a possibility you'll read,
I shouldn't give you the benefit
because I know you thirst to see me bleed. They all say in time it will fade, but one can only hope, with the walls around myself I made there must be a way to cope.