I didn't want you,
I wanted love
and I have realised
that they are not the same thing.

You were a mould
that I poured my insecurities in,
a computer I tried to program.

But you are a sky,
stormy and clear and rainy and warm.

You were so blue when I longed for red.

I didn't want you.
I wanted the thought.

Maybe if we
fall
in love with
each
other all over
again
we'd make it
work.

I can't miss what was
never mine or never ours-
so why does it hurt?

9/6/19
12:38 PM