darling daughter, dad has left us
he says he won't be coming back
it's not your fault or burden, dear
a spell has made him lose his track

my dear mother,
the pain lacerates my heart
his leftover ***** rips my soul
and forever empties my heart of love

love is a concept
a figment of imagination
but does it truly exist
when i am here?

my heart's tearing too, my sweet
but i'd nimbly endure its double
if i could shield you from its cause
to spare you all grief's trouble

let's not give up on love, my girl
these aching holes in us are proof
we're made to seek its filling warmth
and to nest beneath its sheltering roof

your daddy's soul is broken too
like a well that's leaked all its water
plagued with a thirst he can't ignore
and demons he's out to slaughter

but mother,

is it so when
our hearts are ripped
from every corner of our soul,
we turn into unforseen beasts?

the pain seeps
into me like
some sort of poison
i can't control

my walls are broken
how can i ever mend
against a resistance
intent on pursuit of troubles

you weep with the spirit of asaph
who lamented in psalm seventy-three
of emerging a beast in his grieving
embittered by frail men's iniquity

he learned that the path to his healing
was sufficiently wrapped in God's love
that when all on the earth had failed him
perfection reached down from above

the spirits of lost winds
plague him
as he's filled and perforated
with fury

i've pleaded with his spirits
but they've forsaken him
continuously receded
and left his body

he shook hands
with the innermost depths
of his cold heart
and can't be freed

so maybe his leaving us is his love
to protect us from his deep torment
i know it's not right, but in his own way
feeling without him we'd be more content

i pray he'll find solace in God's grace
and the power that sets free a captive
for there's nothing of mortal persuasion
to redeem fallen souls unadaptive

if not for Christ's paschal atonement
no man could escape hellish rage
and except for His Spirit's blowing
we'd all be locked up in death's cage

no man has encountered more fury
than this One who was torn for us
marred beyond human recognition
to bear sin and shame on the cross*

i guess, mother
it's now time to leave
who he was
to what he has become

the path has been
divided into two
as if it were separate worlds
but the hell is all but subsided

(b.d.s.)