the house next door makes me
sad.
both man and wife rise early and
go to work.
they arrive home in early evening.
they have a young boy and a girl.
by 9 p.m. all the lights in the house
are out.
the next morning both man and
wife rise early again and go to
work.
they return in early evening.
By 9 p.m. all the lights are
out.

the house next door makes me
sad.
the people are nice people, I
like them.

but I feel them drowning.
and I can't save them.

they are surviving.
they are not
homeless.

but the price is
terrible.

sometimes during the day
I will look at the house
and the house will look at
me
and the house will
weep, yes, it does, I
feel it.

The beautiful birds outside
sing their daily songs

The flower buds
wait until the spring so they can see their own world

The autumn leaves
seep into the earth only to rejoin the cycle

Your boots
wait for your feet to join them once again for another one of your outside adventures

Your favorite sweater
the one that smells like me
hugs your body close to keep you safe from the crisp of the air

And I
wait until my arms can be wrapped around your waist once again

It never felt like the first time.
The way your hands rested on my waist
Was so familiar
Your lips on my neck was tradition
There was never a first time
My legs have been wrapped around you since
You, and I, and the earth were indistinguishable star dust.

And it didn’t matter that I didn’t know you
Because I was so comfortable
When there was nothing to hear but the small stutter in your breath

And I don’t mind that you aren’t here anymore
Because in the darkness it’s easy to pretend
That clocks don’t exist
But right now with the sun in my eyes,
I can tell myself there’s a time and a place for everything

And it’s okay that there is so much left to say
That won’t ever be said
Because I can’t tell them how it felt
To breathe you in
Or how I couldn’t stop my fingers from gliding through your hair
It’s okay that there aren’t words to do our night justice
Because this doesn’t exist for
All the other souls to know
How my body trembled in perfect response to your gentle force,
These words are for me
So I can remember the shocking comfort of hot finger tips
On my flesh.

and i promise
that every single night
before the darkness
swallows this already
blackened world,
i'll tell you how
beautiful you are to me.
i'll tell you how much
i adore you

I know that I'm no good for you
You are the sun, moon, stars, sky
All the wonderful things in this universe
While I'm just a breathing human being
Who merely craves for your existence
more and more each day

I want to softly whisper
incomplete poems
on your collar bones
that don't rhyme with anything
but your heavy breathing.

I want to bury my face
in the curves of your neck
because you smell like the winter clouds
and I've been gazing at the sky
since you left.

The moon breaks through the window with luminosity
Your chest rises and falls lightly with every calming breath
My pale fingers trace your gorgeous skin as I lay awake
I blink with every inhale of breath your sleeping body takes
Our legs are tangled together to keep us from moving apart

My fingers seem to trail towards your collar bones
Chirping crickets and hissing cicadas fill the silent void
My colorless lips tug into a smile for you have awoken
Your lips lure towards my ear in a swift manner
Words of love and wishes for the future pour from your lips

And we end the night with a simple kiss

I miss your wrists;
and the way they unhinge
at the cliff edge of my shoulders.
I miss standing breath to breath,
close enough to feel your heart
making music against my chest.

Seagulls pacing dark skies.
Walking circles below,
with a cigarette, in the snow.
Thinking of reuniting with you.

I went back to the past,
exhausted by everything new,
estranged by my time with strangers.
Dreaming of reveries untrue.

I went back to the future,
but all it showed me was you.
Nothing of what would become,
nothing of what we would do.

I wanted to break that portal,
to cut myself off,
to be free of prophetic visions.
I was afraid to be alone.

So I let it sit,
like a canker,
like a cyst,
until I would be brave enough.

Brave enough to step through it.