The constant feeling of drowning
suffocation.
No regeneration, and no hope.
Waving goodbye to dreams and prospering amenities.
Nothing can hurt you anymore,
you've felt it all before.
Nothing in this ******* world gives you chills
upsets you, or scares you
the way it did the first time
your problems bluntly ripped off your skin,
exposed your skeleton and poisoned
your organs,
exposing the hurt you
expressed in the little journal that fit in your pillowcase.
You no longer have fear that tomorrow you wont wake-
it's become more of a dream than anything.
Wishing that you wake up with your loved one
by your side
but wondering who would care
so much as to comfort you... scarcity?
Addicted to the brain washing pills,
or the hurt one inflicts on you.
You feel good about your poor decisions,
and with no direction, take the path to hell.
but that's normal, that's all you know.
and its not your fault,
though fully aware of your mistakes.
Twisted destinies among the greatest of people,
who knows where we'll end up.

everything about you
makes me want
to caress every crevice of your skin,
learn every winkle and imperfection
in your distraught face.
your eyes speak wonders to those
of the untold caverns you dig
in your inner most sanctuaries.
Although your sanctuaries bring
the only hurt your body will ever feel
you treasure them like they're detrimental
to your being.
how horrifyingly beautiful it is
to see your current state of mind.
How it seems the devils touch ran
through your veins.
You've turned so horribly evil
and it's riveting.
I love all of your ****** up tendencies
and it amazes me how beautiful
you actually are.
Through every scar of your skin
and every droughty word that
flows from your mouth.
Infected with poison, and every touch
to your lips.
Needing more of the morphine your blood draws.
you drank my feelings like it's the only
thing you know how to do.
you're so dangerous and I love it.
I adore the dangerous nature of your actions.
your presence is enough of a mystery
to keep me attracted
to the lights in your dim eyes.
Beautifully simplistic.

Your bones cast a shadow in the depths of your skeleton.
You once took a subtle beating to the skull
and played it off as your hands were wrapped in concrete.
Discovering your own marks and feelings within your body
- unheard truths spoken to the part of your heart
you have not yet discovered.
There your eyes lay to rest on a beautiful being
other than a fantastical collage of the beautiful things in life. Disengaging gruesome faiths to a god you'll never believe in.
Having nothing to grasp leaves your mind wandering
through the dangerous parts of a secret passage in all ends.
Never remembering why you're encouraged to fail
but knowing your fate lies in the hands of an unworthy witch
with a bad head on their shoulders.
With your dues written in stone
trudge along to the sound of your own dismay and sulk
while realizing your worth and your need.

*None of what we are will ever be worth anything that we should be

Mysterious covenants
withdrawn from society
and told not to speak of.
Hidden vouchers of happiness
and a life of wealth
buried among the most
ancient temples in the world.
Never to be spoken of
due to fear of realization
that this world is a mound of
disappointment and ridicule.
No one body be free
and no one soul live comfortably.
Wether in wealth, in mental health
or in streak of stealth.
In realizing all set up for failure
we try and we fall..
We give everything we contain
to fail and to die.

The drapes in your skull
and your sunken in eyes,
who has broken you?
-
Collarbones protruding
from your withered chest
and your lungs heave for one breath-
one breath too many.
-
The stress of the days,
and the strawberry blonde boy
you fell in love with
on the countryside.
Your heart is broken.
-
Slumped in the cracked city
you are forced to call home,
and the loved ones who have passed
but whom are not dead.
-
Ridiculing the creeping insects
looking for a home.
*****, gross, worthless
You realize.
That's what they call you
-
Sun setting a forcefully pale orange,
awakening the night.
Time for your dismay to set.
-
Light your cigarette
and ash it on your skin,
amazed by its burn.
Pain? None.
-
An insomniac's racing mind
and all the wonders of the world.
Waiting, time contemplating.
-
Wishfully disappearing
just like your soul did.

Drag your feet against the pavement,
bleed your heels some more
Value the hurt
and that you feel pain.
Retract your strings
and put  boundaries on yourself.
Don't run free
you'll only be caught.
Continue to fill yourself with hope
that the most miserable of things
will fill you with joy.
Try to wrap your heart around a love
that is anything but true.
Open one door
to find a black hole in the other
and step into a dimension of
trust issues, self harm, hate for the world.
Forget all your responsibilities
and drop all respect
to dig a grave for your future.
Position yourself for a smooth road
and crumble when it bumps.
Remember your hard times
and relive all your hell.
And never forget
bring all the hurt to yourself.