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 Apr 2018 mk
japheth
hello
 Apr 2018 mk
japheth
as i finally swim back up
from holding
my breath underwater
for so long,

i say goodbye
to
regret,
sadness,
pain,
and suffering.

i feel the sun’s
warm kiss upon my
cold, soaked up skin.

as i breathe my first air
after a long time,

i say hello
to
beginnings,
happiness,
healing,

and the beauty
of life.
i like to do laps at our university pool. like, i was training myself to go for 100 laps every time. last two weeks ago, i had a panic attack, in the middle of my swimming and thankfully, i knew what to do and i was at the side of the pool already.

i stopped swimming after a week, scared that it’ll happen again.

but today, i swam. even though i only did 20 laps, i felt that i was getting back my groove again.

i’m not scared of the water anymore.

because i learned how to breathe.
 Apr 2018 mk
avalon
hm. somehow i missed you,
anxiety. i feel
more myself, this is
familiarity in a
nutshell, i know the
buzz
in my chest cavity
better than i know
myself,
it seems.
i guess i'm not the epitome
of health, these days
late nights
droughts and self-doubt all
seem to take out
the part of me that used
to dream. or think. or
do anything at all
really.
i guess that's okay,
i guess
between loneliness
and fear there's
an alleyway, home,
a place you don't go
until you're there,
realizing more
and more
how easy it is to stay
and how hard it is to care.
**** i super appreciate everyone who takes the time to like/love/comment i love u if u do that i s2g
 Apr 2018 mk
everly
pg. 51
 Apr 2018 mk
everly
they leave
and act like it never happened
they come back
and act like they never left




ghosts
the sun and her flowers by rupi kaur
 Apr 2018 mk
avalon
Untitled
 Apr 2018 mk
avalon
been on this earth a whole 18 years and truthfully it feels longer. i'm set in my ways, set in the rhythm of rigid days, set believing morality is an endless maze and people are never who they say.

break! monotony is a dream! monotony is only real on the days you don't scream
as if 'Untitled' will leave me unjudged or unseen
 Apr 2018 mk
laura
funny how it's always
been about you

the wind's through the larynx
of a world raging without us
the song's making us weep

the stage too hard to cast our swag on
fingers to shaky to turn the page

i've been kicking it with a friend
the undertone of sinister elegance
of age - the vanishing of what used to be
drakes the type of ***** that makes me miss that one girl from second grade who took my green crayon.

i miss her. more importantly i want that crayon back
 Apr 2018 mk
Pea
i wish i was in hell these days, burning
warmth so overwhelming it hurts
burn so severe it eliminates everything else

i want to forget this body, this lonely
that unlawfully resides within me
in raging eternal flames, that's how
i want to be forgotten
i want to become ashes, rise again
only to burn to death again
that's how i want to forget
what it's like to have skin and bones
what it's like to disguise the skeleton with fat and cellulites

i wish i was in hell these days, burning
yet all i do is hoarding, gorging, overindulging
in this cold room of a landfill, as a lifestyle
but also no, i don't live like this
i don't live at all

i want to prove the world wrong
i want to nullify your religion
i want you to know the absolute truth

i want to burn, because coldness
is how i know hell. i want to break,
because my whole is how
i become hell

hell is all in my head
hell is all over my body
hell is penetrating my every pores
because it's gaping wide, asking for it
asking to be filled, asking for anything
asking for enlargement, asking to reduce themselves
asking to perish, forcefully, painfully, then all at once
 Apr 2018 mk
River
ache
 Apr 2018 mk
River
i appreciate the ache
that comes from
a long day of walking in the sun

like a keepsake
is the joy tucked in my heart
after a day of choosing to smile
and laughing on purpose

some days i feel so connected
so entwined
with everyone and everything
i feel the joy swell through me
and produce love and peace in me

my mind and heart becomes as tranquil as a babe coddled in maternal arms
i rest in this eternal love

i love the ache
of a body well lived
and well loved.
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