I wish I was well-versed,
in the sacred art of fading,
it really sounds quite beautiful.

From what I can gather,
fading allows you to be in 'love' one day,
and empty the next -
void of any emotions towards the once golden girl,
whose light is now a meagre amber; yellowing fast.

I just can't let you go
Even if you've *let me go

Firstly,
thank you,
for the way you did it,
dropping me like that,
from such a height,
letting me cascade and crash like that

no-one ever expresses how they feel,
until their feelings fade,
and all of a sudden,
there's no need for an explanation,
only broken goodbyes

you get told that you're strong
that you're gonna be okay,
but that's no use at present,
I am going to be okay,
One day - maybe soon -
it's not gonna hurt anymore,
I'll get to fade too

but for now,
I'm sincerely yours,
and that ******* *****.

Ambering leaves are what I think of
when I think of what I've lost
Yes they are beautiful
Yes they are indeed my favourite
But they are dwindling,
dying out
they are not whole-hearted or right,
they are merely decaying

You misunderstood my darling,
come closer, I'll whisper it to you;
closer now,
draw  in once more,
I crave nothing more than your twisted temptation -
close enough?

*******

You did hear me correctly darling,
there was no stutter,
you are deserving of nothing less,
that's just it you see,
you deserve less than nothing
for you care for no-one
for destruction forms your entertainment

You got it yet?
Don't you dare think that I feel anything
I am neither angry nor sad,
I do not hate you,
I am indifferent
sorry for the victimisation.

Listen,
to you it may all be a game,
it's a laugh,
a joke,
which is something I like the most about you;
there's nothing serious plaguing your soul

but it's just got to be remembered,
i'm much too fragile to fall for it
whole-heartedly,
i refuse to see myself as anything
special to anyone
i'm much too destructive for that

so thanks and all
but i don't think i'm right for you
and ******* for that too.

maybe I don't want to fall in love,
and maybe that makes me a cynic -
but it is better that
than to risk losing the most precarious thing of all;
myself

the only real commitment which
I desire,
is to myself;
I never want to feel replaced
by another  temporary soul
a mere wanderer