she drinks peach flavoured ice-tea but it doesn’t quench her thirst
she’s taking off her jacket and she’s warm
maybe it’s because her heart will burst
from all the love she carries inside it
her nails are painted against her will
I cut the split ends of her hair while I give her a pill
she lets me know the sound of me breathing brings calm to her mind
if that’s the case I’ll keep my breaths refined

we stole that shirt together
she says it’s okay for they’re corrupt
and that’s why we’re allowed to disrupt
we take the train with an unknown destination
she may rest her head against the window
just the sight brings me inspiration

we’ll destroy our town with propaganda
we say the police are cruel and dumb
she's disguised as sweeter than cherry plum
one day we’ll travel far and wide
soon enough we’ll be running away
I love her more for every day

black and red paint has stained the skin of my arms
one could call them proof of what’s happened
or perhaps a constellation
a representation or a manifestation
of what’s got my mind running too fast for my body to keep up
distraction is momentary and the clouds always come back
night time
darkness
the dinner table with a dish laid out
a pressure on my chest or an illusion of your eyes and smile
are you here?
where have you gone?

tomorrow I’ll clean up and the paint lining my arms will wash out
maybe it left a mark
I know myself and I know I always doubt
I doubt in myself and the interest of people around me
perhaps I’m the embodiment of delusion as I portray myself as artsy
truth is I probably can’t paint for **** and I only follow the lines
I write poems but they’re not concise
I patch up the hole in my jeans the same way I patch up myself
it’s messily done and the seams will tear apart
kind of like my heart

calling out for you seems impossible
I don’t know if it’s you or me that’s locked away
at this point I’d submit and pray
to an all godly power or a made up portrait of a saviour
I know it’s not for me
is eternal longing my life sentence?
will the paint ever wash out?
my punishment is set
do I have the right to complain?

please let me know you’re safe

I gave my heart a microphone
and now it cannot stop yelling
it forms a mouth and the words that leave burn my insides
I reach to protect my ears
for the screams my heart creates will forever stain my hearing

my heart demands a stage with the brightest of spotlights
it yells for a pristine red carpet to be laid along its way
thread in a needle and it all takes its shape
I put myself to work

I beg for a quiet moment but now it wants a mute audience
my heart is a puppeteer and it’s got me on strings
hands are tied and I fear that the duct tape is next
it keeps on yelling and I know to shut my mouth

I’ve put a pen in my hand
my heart gave me paper
now it wants me to write out every word it says
write about how my chest is bleeding and my throat is locked
write about the lack of meaning and hope inside this heart
tell whoever reads these words that the writer is flawed

now I’m yelling louder than ever
for everything ******* hurts
my heart is me and it’s hanging on for dear life
it’s torn around the edges and I don’t think it looks right
everything’s wrong and I don’t know how to fix it
my heart is yelling
please listen

his eyes turn the lightest shade of blue when despondency takes over
I can’t see myself but I’m sure my eyes aren’t as significant
my heart erupts onto my sleeves and my makeup is ruined
I couldn’t care less

he’s the master of concealing what’s held captive in his mind
I long for the day I can catch a glimpse
but it’s not my right to force the key
even though freeing him from the cage is all I desire

I told him uncertainty is my frailty
but there’s no doubt in my mind that he’s worth every moment
for time has moved faster than I expected
and I’m madly in love with him

and I know I’m shedding tears and he blames himself
but what’s the use in that?
I’ll take the momentary despair
for every other second spent with him
attaches wings onto my shoulder blades
I can fly above the clouds

one day I’ll be able to bring him fairy dust
one day he’ll look in the mirror
and he’ll finally see the person I’ve always seen
he’s the definition of love
he’s my love

she lined the floor with squares of stone with cement in between
footsteps will echo and perhaps never cease to exist
although she may not want to admit
I think she fell and hurt her mind
on the perfectly imperfect stones she created for herself

did the echo ever bounce off the walls?
your head is damaged, darling
it’s all within the sphere of your mind
but do not fret
they come bearing bandages made of thorns and barbed wire
it may cut up your skin but what does that matter?
you’re already bleeding

please accept this gift of insanity
your thoughts are safe inside your broken shell
let them seep through the wounds
we’re just a friendly audience
let us applaud you for your sacrifice
oh my, I’m glad I brought you those stones
even happier that you supplied the cement

oh the feeling of your hands as they graze against my skin
how protected I feel with your arms around me
my legs will wrap around you
and my toes will curl with every move
stay with me like this forever
or at least for as long as you’ll have me
you’re like sugar coursing through my bloodstream
and suddenly I’m addicted to candy

you’ve got me wrapped around your finger
but baby, for once I’m not afraid to trust
I will dare to say that you’ve given me the greatest gift of them all
for you’ve made life a fairytale and I still can’t fathom
how my heart doesn’t just beat for survival
it beats for you

my lungs will fill with the air you’ve exhaled
and I will cherish every breath
my gaze will settle onto yours and I swear I’m close to drowning in your eyes
this must be what living feels like

my heart has been portrayed as fragile
I painted an image of a beat so slow it shouldn’t keep me alive
I thought it was smithereens of what it used to be
my mind has kept me in the dark
for my heart isn’t bleeding

I feel safe with your arms wrapped around me
you shield me from a world that scares me
when I’m with you I feel a high that no cloud can beat
the sky turns dark and for once I feel protected

your voice is like the sweetness of honey
eyes are glimmering like the most precious gems
I want to get lost in them again
“you are beautiful”

I feel you inch closer and everything feels right
for your lips are soft as they touch mine
and your smile is the most beautiful sight
I think I’m addicted to your touch

I’m unfamiliar with the feelings that have inhabited my heart
I promise you that I’ve never felt this before
the thought of holding a special place within you is what keeps me going
counting down the days till we meet again
I’ve told you a thousand times how much I miss you
but you miss me too
and I couldn’t be more grateful