That awkward moment
When your ****** gets a girl pregnant
And gets engaged.

And your just sitting drunk,
And ****** up,
On the floor of your old bedroom
In your parent’s house.
Listening to Avril Lavigne and Iron and Wine.

Just ****** up.

it's not easy being me.
filled with anxiety.

it's not fun being me.
forever lonely.

it's not pretty being me.
especially the person I see.

it's not easy,
but it's my responsibility.

I traded a piece of my mind
For what I thought was
A peace of mind.

i can write a book on
how much i hate still loving her,
every chapter
dedicated to paradoxical disdain
or paint a picture
of the void she left
using
the obscene colors of my pain

i can sing forever
about the time we lost
to the tune
of the games we played
or i could just get over her
but i cant
forgive
forget
or explain

If tomorrow was that yesterday,
or that morning
came tonight
if for a moment you could have listened
if you didn't always have to be right

if she realized the words  
Get out
really meant
You’d love her help
if you swallowed more than pills
or thought about
more than just yourself

but yesterday left in a sunset
obscured
by a cloud of pride
and for tomorrow
it’s still not too late
but you're running out of time

You drink to remember.

I drink to remember to forget.

You know I never really thought
About college or jobs or even
The future.
I never really thought
I'd be alive long enough to get here.

I'm a tiny blade of grass
In a meadow, all alone
Nobody comes to visit me
Nobody calls my phone

Oh, if I could make a friend
This tiny blade of grass would cheer!
Hey, this must be my lucky day
'Cause look:
Here comes a deer!