sa gitna ng aking bangungot
ako ay biglang nagising
sabay tapon sa aking kumot
dahil ang teplepono ko ay nagriring

sinagot ang tawag sa ibang lingwahe
sumagot pabalik ang tinig ng babae
akoy nagulat at walang masabe
nang marinig ang pangalan nabuo sa isip ang imahe

imaheng kamakailan ko lang huling nakita
nung isang taon pa ako sa kanya huling nakabisita
ang kinalalagyan niya ngayon ay "not too far"
biglang pasok ang tanong na, "meron ba kayong C.R."?

tinanong ko kung bakit siya napatawag?
ako daw ay kanyang namimiss
pakipot na ako ay hindi na pumalag
gusto kong sanang itanong kung pwede bang pakiss?

nawala ang antok at gising na gising
kahit sa pagkakataong iyon siya ay lasing
walang humpay at nagkwentuhang parang praning
pero sayang naman itinapon niya yung sing-sing ^^

hindi maipaliwanag ang eksaktong nararamdaman
kagagaling lang sa sakit siguro ay alam mo naman?!
mahal kita at takot akong tayo'y magkasakitan
"i know Were cool" at sobrang close na magkaibigan

ayokong maging bitter ako sa tula
kaya kalimutan mo ung pang anim na stanza
sobrang mahal kita mula noong hanggang ngayon
at kung ikaw ang bumabasa nito ALAM KONG ALAM MO YON!

sa puntong ito, lagi kang nagkakape sa isip ko
nagpapaalala lang, baka abutin ka jan ng pasko?
sobrang init ng kape at hindi mo matapos ng mabilis
kanina ka pa jan wala ka bang balak umalis?

nilabas ko nang lahat ng nararamdaman ko dito sa tula
hindi ko alam kung ikaw ay maiinis o matutuwa
sa aspeto ng pagibig itanong mo kay Amora manghuhula
at ako naman ay sa Magic 8 ball na hugis bola

naiinis ako ngayon sa sarili ko
kung babasahin mo yung tula talagang nakakagago
PERO parang gusto ko ulit pumasok sa puso mo
dahil ako ang U.L.O.L mo! itaga mo yan sa bato!

sana gusto mo akong makita ulit
kahit na ako'y madaldal at makulit
sana magkatotoo ang "Muling Ibalik"
sana matikman ko ulit ang matabang na halik . . .

wag **** ipilit at baka lumala
baka mawala nanaman yan na parang bula
ang kulay ng paningin niya sayo ay pula
siguro masmakakabuting idaan mo na lang sa isang tula

patawad sa mapaglaro kong pagiisip
hindi ko inakalang itoy iyong pagkakatitigan
kabayaran para sa aking kasalanan ay di ko nasilip
kalokohang taglay sadyang hindi ko mapigilan

pahupain ang alon, patayin ang apoy
isabay mo sa hangin ng oras at panahon
puro ka kasi kalokohan ayan tuloy!
wala akong maisip na katunog ng panahon

itong tula na to ay para magsorry talaga sayo
pero alam kong makukulitan ka lang
makulit talaga ko, hindi lang talaga ko mapakali
gusto ko kasi peace tayo palagi

sapakin mo na lang ako pag nakita mo ako
wag lang yung ganito, silent treatment
torture, gusto pa naman kitang palageng kausap
kahit wala na sa rhyme tong tula na to

gusto ko lang talagang magsorry

may diskusyon na galing sa nakaraan
tungkol sa pagsisisi sa naganap na hiwalayan
ang higit na pagmamahal ay sadyang maparaan
nagbalik itong muli ng di namamalayan

kung sa hinaharap ay walang kasiguraduhan
bubusugin kita ng pagibig sa kasalukuyan
at kung tayo at panahon ay magkasubukan
hihintayin kita upang sa dulo'y magkatuluyan

ang pagulit sa kawangis ng kahapon ay ligaya
ito ang dahilan sa sarap ng muling pagsasama
huwag maglilikot pagka't di na magagaya
ang inayos na daan papunta sa iisang kama

sa di mapigilang kabaliwan at kalokohan
sa dalas **** maubos ang aking pisi
at kahit hirap sa pagsunod sa aking kagustuhan
ikaw pa rin ang pipiliin at di magsisisi ♥

hiniling ng diwang bumalik sa sinapupunan
sa panahong ika'y hinahainan ng hapunan
lahat ng bagay ay pwedeng iisang tabi
tulog sa paghalik ng umaga sa gabi

di akalaing maipaghahalo ang saya at sakit
kailangan **** mamatay para mabuhay
higop sa kamalayan o kapeng mapait
hibang ang sarili, kaisipang mahalay

babarin ang isip sa likidong tutunaw sa lahat
tikman mo ang iyong dagat na walang kasing alat
manlagkit sa salamin, tapos na ang bukas
hahalik ang umaga sa gabi at wala kang takas

ang katamaran ay humahalili sa kapalpakan
hinayaan **** humalik ang umaga sa gabi
wag kang magdahilan, hindi mo sinubukan
pigilan ang paghalik ng umaga sa gabi

Gumising ng maaga para sa pagsusulit
sinumpa ang pagpupuyat at hindi na uulit
sa tabi ng kalye ako'y nagaabang ng jeep na masasakyan
isang istudyante lang po, bicutan bababa kaya sais lang yan

sa pagbagtas ng hari ng kalsada sa daan
papalapit sa simbahan at huminto ng marahan
isang babaeng grasa  sa jeep ay sumampa
sa sobrang payat daig pa ang isang batang lampa

mata'y nanlilisik at nagsusumiksik sa gilid
sa utak ay may pitik ng takot at kwentong nakakaantig
dumi sa katawan hindi mawari kung sinong nagpahid
o babaeng grasa sa akin ngayon siya'y nakatitig

hindi natuwa ang piloto ng sasakyan
minura ang babae sabay dampot ng kawayan
sa tanranta ng babae, di alam ang kalalagyan
isang mabilis na habulan!, isang matinding awayan!

sinambit ng maruming labi ang bawal na salita
mapanghamon ang babaeng grasa, tila nagbanta
walang laban sa piloto parang gulay na lanta
may pagmura sa pagbaba, sabay banat ng isang kanta

ang istorya sa jeep para sa akin ay tapos na
kalbaryo ng babaeng grasa patuloy na naguumpisa
wala sa katinuan, di nawawalan ng gana
pagtahak sa magulong buhay siya ay nagiisa

babaeng grasa

murahin mo ako aking kaibigan
gisingin mo ako mula sa kahibangan
higit mo pang lakasan at huwag tigilan
pigilan mo ang lamig ng tagulan

ang daplis ng suntok mo'y mainit
ngunit kulang pa sa lakas upang ako'y magising
sa sumunod **** sipa ako'y namilipit
naalimpungatan lang ako sa iyong pagpilit

ihampas mo na lang ako sa lupa para cool

gusto kitang maniwala
sa mga sasabihin kong salita
ang luha ay ubos na

kalungkutan ko'y nasasabik
gustong magbago at umagos sa pisngi
at hinding hindi maabutan ng bagsik
ang mga tainga **** nagkukunwaring bingi

tuyot sa kailaliman hanggang kaibuturan
o hangin wag mo akong hipan
baka di ko kayanin dala **** ginaw
lamigin ang aking gabi habang ang utak ay natutunaw

ang pagpikit ay gumagarantya sa sariling mundo
walang makakaalam at makakapasok kundi ikaw at ako
magdidilim sa tawag ng reyalidad papunta sa kamang lundo
aking panaginip, bakit hindi kita mailagay sa isang sako?

sa isang buntong hininga madarama ang tinik
sakit na dulot ng panghihinayang at di madaan sa wisik
tinatanong ang sarili kung saan nagkasala
maglalaho ka pala, bakit wala man lang babala?

gusto kitang maniwala
sa mga sasabihin kong salita
ang luha ay ubos na

Huwag **** paunlakan
pagka't di naman ito ipinagtutulakan
huwag mo ring masamain
pagkat di lang naman ikaw ang puwedeng naisin

isa lamang siya sa mga mata,
na nakakakita kung ano man ang puwedeng mahalata
tingin ko mas dapat mo pa ngang ikasaya
pagkat sa iyo'y mayroong humahanga

ang binitiwan **** salita ay hindi puwedeng gumana sa isa
naniniwala akong nakaramdam ka din, kaya ka dumistansya
ngunit bakit mo pa ito kailangang ipahayag sa amin?
gayong walang kalasag na proprotekta sa kanyang damdamin.

ako'y hihingi ng tawad kung ika'y nasaktan
ngunit huwag **** ipagkait itong aking kahilingan,
na kung sa susunod ay muli mo itong maranasan,
maari bang huwag mo na itong lakasan?

piktyuran mo ako ng ganyan
bidyohan mo't mejo hubaran
dapat kita yung buong katawan
gawin natin ito sa ibat ibang paraan

galit ako sayo, dito tayo magaway
sa kita ng madaming tao ngunit di ni nanay at tatay
subukan niyong magcomment at kayo'y madadamay
gusto naming dito mag away at walang sasaway

dapat nilang makita ang aking agahan
dapat nilang makita ang aking tanghalian
dapat nilang makita ang aking hapunan
dapat ulit nilang makita ang aking hapunan

And the rat was never sure about the cheese
smelled it once, smelled it twice and then release
felt something wrong and was never pleased
not sure if it was poisonous but still he rinse

the first encounter was a blast
I've never expect that it will Last
nothing to speak but beauty and praises
I can now define happiness through coffee and braces

her legs are so ****, it won't meet
the meat in the middle is what i like to eat
every after meal I always go to her seat
sharing stories of our lives with a long malicious slit

Confusion confuses the agony
emotion change like the transition of a symphony
pleasurably bad, she invaded this territory
in my hands are the conclusion of this scroll bar theory

I ought to smile when salary raises
move a mile when traveling in different places
If happiness can be found at the end of various mazes
I think I'll just walk a while, accompanied by her coffee and braces

she pinches me into the darkness
dried our playing ground
taking us to tangerine heaven
nostalgia, it will sound like

endless expressions of happiness
coming from semi-innocent minds
let the dust fill our skin
before the moon makes us all blind

these memories will never demise
stronger than the strongest wind and will always remind
of our afternoon sun
she's always good to us
our afternoon sun
we should go out and its a must

here we are, when black turns into white
and slowly looses those youthful hype
but will always understand and miss
our afternoon sun
even it's virtually gone
our afternoon sun
we haven't seen it in a month

our eyes may hurt from these watered chlorine
but we dont need euphoria from this morphine

As you walk in oxygen depletes
you will be solving puzzles that never complete
you'll be winning to foes that never compete
and will always hear a part of a song that always repeat

gazing into the unreal is a thing to avoid
opening your hands will give you nothing but void
escaping mazes makes you feel like being toyed
it's an endless loop of questions, don't be annoyed

existence, galaxy and everything eternal
this place is heavenly peaceful yet infernal
never thought that you'll be seeing peoples internal
organs. So are the thoughts of you being an abnormal

a part of you will want to stop
but this ain't democracy and decisions are made on top
so you'll overload your mind until it pops
out your brain, but won't let it drop.

bloated with liquefied verb
numb feeling for the thinking muscle
sweet sound will sometimes swerve
little-lest things are going in a hustle
pressing keys, i'm not dazzled

emptiness will occupy the rounded roots
stop, stare, tap the snare
imagination pops, voala! colorful fruits
shop, share, college hair
someones asking me, are you there?

words are needed to communicate
we are all cursed to integrate
initiate, advocate , innovate
crowd as they were, they agitate
so i swim on this letter not aware, im saturate

We're both wrong and now is the time
for our punishment that should act like a mime
when suddenly HIS eyes started to speak
telling the judge, "please don't **** me, i am weak"

We're both wrong and now is the time
for our punishment so I should act like a mime
when suddenly MY eyes started to speak
telling the judge, "please don't **** me, i am weak"

And I'm the only one who got killed

Darkness adds flavor to satisfy taste
unhandled Mood swings are all over the place
those Eyes must be capable of Lying
sinful, so be it, but i don't want to see her Crying

Thick outer crust is what she always project
things related to Blood shed won't make her feel weaker
Soft inner core is what i need to protect
from her fragile romance and a bottle of liquor

Prototype of my body's chemical reaction
I want to kiss her Lips even in a small fraction
thinking about her Body is a major distraction
She's the most beautiful girl and i don't need your reaction

Outcome can be sweet as sunshine and rainbows
but i don't expect too much because i know how the Wind Blows
and if a Sudden change of Heart will occur
MAHAL NA MAHAL KITA LENG THATS FOR SURE!

I'm not in my comfort zone
trying to think of something special
mix emotions and i almost feel alone
what am i doing, i'm dying while i'm laughing
i'm smiling while i'm crying

the left root is telling me to stop
the right artery is not doing its job right
i'm down, am i happy? going up!
those lovely eyes should not see this. look at the light
force myself to think of something bright. . .

paranoid on their own perspective
I'm not doing this right, I'm not quite effective
ecstasy is what i want! i demand! imperative!
you can judge me now and say defective!
almost dizzy, it's still beating, long live!

as long as she is away i will miss her
as long as she is in love with me i will kiss her
nothing can stop me from loving her
i am my own worst enemy, my ***** mind
but this day wont pass without saying I LOVE YOU because your one of a kind!

so how am i going to start?
yeah! i remember! with a silent ****
enough to suffocate all beings inside this shop
carbon dioxide is replacing the oxygen i need them to stop!

the little child's mind is corrupted with violent games
the bigger child's mind is getting bigger and learning to aim
virtual guns are everywhere bonded with mind cleansing tragic
demons, trolls and other creatures is two inches tall with a little bit of magic

at this moment noisy beings are gone
but they are replaced by a ******* mom
she's kinda quiet but don't make her mad
she curse like there's no tomorrow! do you want me to call your dad?

cyber world has no rules to follow
i know your mind is filled but it can make you hollow
I'm an I.T. student with a lot of projects to make
but how can i concentrate? when this computer shop doesn't give me enough oxygen to take?

i hope this lungs where fake
i hope this mind won't break
i shout! somebody give me a cake!
surfing the net, hey! who is drake?

I remove my beard to please a kiss
until this time, I still reminisce
in fact this poem won't help me save
the hair that I've gave from the last time I've shaved

a quick smack will surely be missed
compared to the french one that is always a bliss
but I won't get it if I miss behave
she knows my ways, so I have to shave

it's not about the butterflies or symbolic sun
not about the midnight lies or heavenly fun
they just won't stop until it's done
they just won't stop until it's dawn

orange light and marble stage are set
you'll never know the motives of their bet
maybe it's for food for the child that's needed to be fed
or for the dangerous high that can only be acquired from ****

toss it all and watch it bounce
coins are dancing with an exciting sound
wait for it, for it will announce
the lucky one and the hungry hound

the winner is expecting a good night bed
not until he realize he ****** them about the things he have said
orange turns to black and black turns to red
you know these kinds of stories, so at the end, they found him dead

by Alvin Guanlao (Bold verses) - Joseph Juatco (Normal Fonts)



Digest

Do you want me to say oblivious?
I didn't even know what it means.
let's try the word conspicuous,
Its meaning is more obvious than it seemed.

I'm a word carnivorous,
meticulous on what i eat.
I'm poetically omnivorous,
Digesting what i see.

Now don't be suspicious,
I'm good in playing words,
You know I can be as righteous,
just as you looking like a ****

Or am I just too ambitious,
I think I am trying hard,
I wanted this write to be sumptuous,
Oh please don't disregard!

i'm afraid to lose it so i grip it tight
disregarding her feelings sure i might
its a big bad sign when we start to fight
now she's moving, getting ready for her flight

there are times in my life like a word to mumble
on my four corner bed room is where i stumble
she likes my arrogant way now its time to be humble
her heart in my hand, is the time when i fumble

my mind is killing me, i want her back so badly
time is healing me but i still remember jack and sally
do i still love her? my answer is definitely
but where i could find her, she's no where else to see

I don't know when
but we must be ready
and have you decided
on when to be castrated

don't, hold my hand
we don't show our feelings
and I thought you completed
all of our training

look out the window
soon we'll be able to count all the stars
feel how the wind blow

because tonight, tonight might be the last
for you and i, together we'll fly so far
until we reach the creator of heaven and stars

tonight tonight, we throw our past
for you and i, together we'll die at last
so we can preach our message from heaven we start

and for a little while
we will be reaching on heaven's gate

i try to keep it calm and write
pin my brain to a thread like a kite
fly! higher than my height and bite
all the things i need, to make imagination fight

white walls blocked my eyes
subject for an artistic re size
i start to doubt this truthful lies
should i grow colder but wise?

long drain from playfulness
cold brain is emptiness
ox brain is for ox
fox brain is for fox

your feeling good and making it right
its like everything in this world is doing fine
but all of a sudden your diamonds turns into dime
all of a sudden you lose focus and started a fight

you fell deeply in love and oh so happy
you always knew that she's the one that your going to marry
but all of a sudden your dreams crashes with a lot of baggage to carry
i know you still love her but there are some memories that you need to bury

you saw a bunch of stones that gives you a good idea
as you stack them higher your eyes gets bigger including the cornea
but all of a sudden a small movement trigger everything to crumble and fall
i know you want to start again but you realize that the consequence has a lot of toll

i started a poem with a delightful inspiration
the rhyming was good and words are in good position
but all of a sudden i ran out of words to write
now I'm perspiring i have to bid goodnight

its twelve midnight and i'm still awake
the funny little girl is always ready to play
she likes the straight and helpless gays
because i promise, i have another poem to make

she loves to sing, she likes to dance
one another thing she's beautiful just give a  glance
she's passionate more than what you think
if you want to know her name, ask me and i'll give you the link

always craving for korean boys
childish in a way, but to old for playing toys
she eats chocolate if there's a chance
but always restricted to it before the next performance

she is happy in every way
a passionate artist
Arvil

i open my eyes and look at the ceiling
cant help but to feel this drowsy feeling
acquired some sickness when will be the healing?
of this infinite loop and will i ever be willing?

to roll the dice and gamble for the future
or stay up all day and endure this torture?
they said i should not give up this said fortune
but how can i pursue my passion for tune?

the unconscious command takes me on a cold floor
this body demands for a conductor like an old score
this sleepless mind is shouting and wanting for more
rest, but i found myself standing at the front door

getting ready to leave and i'm on my feet
just need to pretend that life is sweet
from this hour till dawn i'll be missing some beat
but i have no choice, it's an infinite loop to repeat

hes gone for almost two years
now he's back with a bucket full of fear
manipulating how i think, what i see and what i hear
corrupting my mind with different ideas that would drag me to tears

the one who is responsible for my mistakes
to commit a sin, he just whisper to my ear and that's all it takes
its like everything is going to be fine until my whole world shakes
I'm following him because of my curiosity until i notice that now, my heart aches

laughing and standing at the back of the mirror
and for a while he stops and give a malicious smile
now i know what I'm doing, but its not my style
is it my fault to have him? I created my own horror?

to continue my poem for Dubrechi is going to be a failure
i need to be ok
and right now, im not
sorry Dubrechi
and now he is crying inside the rounded roots

how I love it
when you're coming home
smells like your perfume
mixed with your tired skin and smoke

and I will never
be more stoked,
when you ask me to
join you as your body get soaked

in the water
in the water

never will resist,
you'll be glad tomorrow
ill take you by surprise that

I'm more than me,
more than me

it's a long and tiring day
let me hold your head as you lay down
with my hands i'll squeeze the pain now
away
and then I'll wait
until you say that i'm okay now
and be wanting for another round

in the water
in the water

I'm going to kiss her
I'm getting excited
I'm going to miss her
she's getting excited

its a long run just to be at the finish line
but it's more fun when i know that she's mine
i ask her if she wants it to last forever?
she replied yes and i get a high fever!

I'm so in love with her
i cant even think of another word
I'm so in love with her
we need to make another world!

promise not to hurt her feelings
I'll always make her happy
she is the girl I've been dreaming
the little girl that is so funny.

I'm inspired with you
I'm inspired by you. . .

No good poems for certain duration
I'm converting her as my main temptation
who told you about the alleged separation?
those status connection has no confirmation

positive thoughts has been taken away
for that, count me into the chamber of dismay
waiting for hope and light until the end of the day
we can't make it on time there's no excuse for delay

is the drama working? another question raised
my thoughts are joking, saying things in a haste
now what are you thinking? are you puzzled by my maze
is it done like the old time cooking? maybe but, can't remember the taste

so what's the point? That's a good question!
different answers might lead to a certain tension
your conclusion would depend on your mind's decision
I'll just keep it plain and simple, this poem is done with a negative inspiration

i want to be the air that you take
a part of blood that flows through your veins
i want to be a strand of your hair
that touches your neck and feels the same

i want to be the fire that lights your cigarette
and transform in a smoke that you blow
and if you get dizzy and take a break
you'll remember my name as my love will flow

the time will come that you will get old
when that moment comes i want to be the soil
that eats your coffin having your corpse inside
your body will decay on my presence

and at last
we fuse as one

it's over
I'm a loner
yes I'll get over
this won't last forever

Remember
I'm stronger
endure hunger
can resist the longer

Pain
then I'll gain
nothing will remain
for i will become sane

Game
ready for fame
task are getting lame
because they are the same

You just don't care who might get hurt
or be stained from all the blood and dirt
make way for your monster's birth
threshold limit was reached and so you burst

A new feeling, this is a first
too much energy but can't feel any thirst
you shot friendly fires and so you are cursed
by the people you love but still you burst

A single step and I will run
staying still it means we're done
who takes the heat out of the fire
we tend to break the risk is higher

I sweat it out from my desire
to make you walk and be inspired
if you just help it would be lighter
you've guess it right it would be brighter

I know by now you realized
our status float like butterflies
save us tonight where have you been
I hope that we could meet in between

Run away back home
she's the one I've had before
when will I ever see her
lonely days without Patricia