efni - Hello Poetry

efni Jan 2021

thankfully, the sky was clear
but I was deep in a fog of anxiety
or sailing the famous 9th cloud
either way, that morning was a blur

their timid thumbs pointed to the sky
at least six times during my desperate
rambling to avoid silence, quiet enough
that they could hear my racing heartbeat

eventually those thumbs found their
way to caress the back of my hands
and my tongue found a more sane driver
in a lifesaving a cap of paper strips

31.12.20

1 of 2 - October 25th
(part 3 of my cinnamon series)

Dec 2020

Owen

Four Walls

These four walls
will be the death of me.
Squeezing, constricting
til theres no more breath in me.
Overthinking, thoughts rebounding from the corners
like that screensaver.
Im so capable,
yet unable
to leave.
Frozen as the air outside.
Limbs pinned,
tied like Gulliver.
Guilt and sadness and regret
leak
from eyes
fixed open
unblinking in the dark.

#walls #sad #anxiety #cold #dark #frozen

efni Dec 2020

flaws and sins

i've spent a long time falling
into the frost of my mind

staring at the stubborn eastern sky
for a chance that my night will end

but this fall feels less like frost
it feels like fire, sparks even

and this time, i've seemed to replace
my brain with my heart

clouds melted revealing constellations
always new planets, new stars
and never a lack of beauty

i've spent a long time falling
- but never like this

24.12.20

this one's a bit of a mess, but they often do that to my brain
i'm scared but there is no universe where i would regret this
tomorrow makes 2 months, gem

efni Dec 2020

to the poems i never finished

my inspiration often whips up a title then vanishes completely, filling my drafts with poems like this one

efni Dec 2020

the accident i made on purpose

they would be gone by now
either washed away by the rain
blown by the wind or maybe
cleaned off the ground by a passerby

the spill, the 'accident' that
i'm not sure I regret even though
it wasnt really an accident that
left those pills on the sidewalk

13.12.20

I'm not sure if I'm glad to be alive, if I'm glad I spilled my only way out of here on the sidewalk that night. is that selfish?

efni Dec 2020

borrowed time

every breath seems
to convict me as a
serial thief of oxygen

sentenced to heartbeats
found only outside of
nature's shared melody

and my eyes look as
distant and departed
as stars in the sunlight

i'm not sure where i am

04.12.20

i dont know what, but something's not right.
I feel so out of place...and non-existent