Some associate a tickled pink
with either her favorite
ink-stained pencil case
that is torn at the edges
from overuse
or her favorite undergarments
adorned with lace,
but not enough fabric
that perfectly accentuates her curves
and casts out any thoughts
of innocence.
Personally, I recall my flushed face
that holds a shy smile
that just barely escapes  
when he compliments the equally shaded
but excessively swollen lips
and the way that they travel his skin,
as if begging for more.
We shared a moment on those
fluorescent white sheets
on our wild spring break getaway,
wishing that certain forces
of nature had not come early
and we could be doing more
than taking trips exploring
the contours of each other’s
collarbones with our tongues.

*April 16, 2014 9:58:17 AM

Some associate a faded mint
with either the speckled mint chocolate
chip ice cream from their nearest shop
or the chipped colors on her fingernails
that were the perfect spring shade.
Personally, I recall the sign
at the café down the street
from my cramped two bedroom
apartment that the three of us shared
after they separated,
soaked with nostalgia and resentment
and appreciation for the new home
I share with our new addition
in a much nicer city
where all the houses are beige
cookie cutter resemblances,
but I can take refuge in my car
for the night and not fear
what lies outside the frosted window.

*April 14, 2014 8:54:27 PM

Some associate a light purple
with either the initial bruising
after an accidental run-in
with the blunt edge of her bed
or her favorite eye shadow shade
from the palette she received
as a gift a couple months earlier.
Personally, I recall the violet-kissed moons
that decorate my eyelids
to further the appearance
of a lack of sleep
due to nightmares
of accused genocide by organizations
and rejections
from university programs.

*April 12, 2014 9:52:57 PM

The morning chill tickles my revealing skin,
travels up my thigh like the secrets
you confided in me between the sweet sheets
of our ****** escapade or your fingers gliding up
until it isn’t my leg anymore.
The cold leaves me missing summer
and missing everything that came with it.
Heat that allowed me to wear cute shorts
and left you wanting more, then the heat
that left us sweaty, parched, and ecstatic.
Discounted date nights at the bowling alley,
free try at the batting cages if we had the time,
and a carefree attitude that made every adventure
as special as the last.
I’m dressed in that new leather skirt
you haven’t seen in case it actually warms up later
and attempts to fill the void that the breeze
and the winter and the breakup brought
and left.
The sun peeks through my window
and the day begins anew, much like myself,
and I’m anxious to see what is ahead in lecture
and in life.

*January 22, 2014

It’s unwavering and waits until everyone has
forgotten the sting of the last fallen warrior
to rear its hideous head and take another.
Its speed is unimaginable, unpredictable,
and unforgiveable. It brings both relief
and sorrow so encasing that the depths of
the Pacific could both marvel at and fear
the capacity to which this monster can bring
someone down. It leaves us gasping
for breath and wiping our salty-rimmed eyes
as we try to imagine a more cheerful face
and try to wrap our heads around the fact
that our last family dinner really will be that:
our last. It takes time for us to forgive this
natural force that breaks apart families
to only bring them closer to unite in
the passing and the rejoicing of a well-lived life.
It will come, yet only once the initial stab
of shock and sadness fades, slower
for the ones most closely knitted.

I am extremely saddened at the unforeseeable fall
of your fatherly image and warming smile.
I recall the swims in your backyard pool as we
laughed and played marco polo as you watched on
with your wife, embracing in the happiness and warmth
that summer brought us cousins. We may not have been
related by the blood that ran through our veins,
but we were related by love, matrimony, and
a warming kindness that radiated from you.
I thank you for allowing me to know you,
the Christmas gifts despite the distance between us,
the grey of your hair that signified years of life experience,
the wrinkled fingers that signified your wisdom.
I will look upon the family you have left behind
as you move on to whatever waits for you past mortality
and make sure they remember your laugh and the time
you feel asleep and snored through the Thanksgiving
football game you were talking about earlier that morning
and the kindness you gave them and the happiness you
continually brought to all of them.
I mourn your death and celebrate your life because
although we wish you could have stayed here
with us for a longer time, you were here
enough to truly live.
We will continue to hold onto happy memories
and reminisce to hold you close to our hearts.

Rest in peace, to you, and look down upon your loved ones as we remember you.

*March 1, 2014 1:08:46 PM

I look at the clock as it metaphorically ticks
The minutes and seconds that turn into hours
Of being awake and not being able to escape
Into a world of dreams filled with happiness
And hopes of a man or test grade or smile
Because a better tomorrow is cliché and
Broadway and it can’t possibly capture
The true desperation for some type of
Improvement in the lengths of the white
Tips of my fingernails or the miniscule
And unbearable numbers that line my
Bank account number or the instances
Where the light in the top left corner of
My Galaxy blinks feverishly a yellow
That signifies any type of contact from
These distant co-workers or former peers
But I don’t really expect much because
I’m sure everyone knows about my
Love triangle escapade and skanky
Tendencies so I just blast the 808s &
Heartbreak with the bass beating into
My skin like it’s a part of my inner
***** allowing me to revel in my
Loneliness and try to embrace mine
And Kanye’s similarities

*February 22, 2014 3:49:41 PM

I.
I lean my head on your shoulder after reading
one too many sentences from my history book
and it tickles the back of your neck and you laugh
which I love to hear and you don't
move away so I'm hopeful that maybe you like
the way my head feels on your shoulder or
the way it tickles or the smell of my peppermint gum
that reaches your nostrils because of our closeness
or the fact that I chose you over the table in the purple room
to rest my head on.

II.
I ask you to dump out the bucket of dingy mop water
because it's too heavy and the storage room is small
but not too small for two that want to be close
and you almost don't want to but I give you a smile
with hints of seductivity so sweet that you can't resist
so you agree with just the traveling of my fingertips
across your chest and the unmistakable look in my eye
and we are comfortably cramped in this broom cupboard
but we hear keys so we keep closing.

III.
I walk out into the parking lot and the initial breeze cools
my sweat-kissed skin fresh from cleaning and I look
for your car and you smile with your adorable dimples
from behind your dashboard and I get excited
because there was tension we both felt but
once our manager drives away we can be alone
and you can prove you could win in a fight
that we know will lead to something else.

IV.
I walk up to your window
and your bromance enveloped best friend
is burning your hookah in the passenger seat
and at first I contemplate just returning the name tag
you let me steal and driving down Harvard to go home
but I'm hesitant because the promise of something
of anything is better than nothing so I ask to sit next to you
because the breeze is biting more now.

V.
I start to pick up hints after listening to talks
of football and strategies for fifteen minutes
and that certain promise becomes more like a facade
but I wait for you to tell him you're gonna get going
but instead you whisper that to me
and ask if he wants to go get food
as I'm getting up from the seat
so I ask for a hug as I'm leaving
and you ask if you can let go now
and I get it.

VI.
I hand you back your name tag
and you tell me to get home safe
and I don't even bother to sigh or look back
because I already hear your car running.

*February 13, 2014 2:39:47 PM