In all the years gone by
Nothing ever seemed so clear
When no one saw me cry
Letting go of all my fear

Blinded by my own tears
I didn't see the headlights
Thinking to myself how peaceful it was
To watch me die

Don't throw my body in the ground
I'd rather have a look around
Toss my ashes to the wind
And let me fly free again

Don't look for me when I'm gone
Ill be singing a new song
One you've never heard before
Listen for my voice on the shore

Search for the light
Long after I am out of sight
Don't focus on your sorrows
Think of how I smiled before tomorrow

Blinded by my own tears
I didn't see the headlights
Thinking to myself how peaceful it was
To watch me die

Something you cannot yet trust
Let me crawl underneath your skin
Resurface all your scars
Begin to mend what you would call your flaws

If I could tell you what I wanted to say
But I am much too afraid
Unsure if you'd throw me to the wind and tell me don't come back again
If I could tell you what I wanted to say

Covered in your wounds I cry deep inside
You're too beautiful to hide behind your lies
You light up the room but cannot recall
That you have a heart behind all your walls

If I could tell you what I wanted to say
But I am much too afraid
Unsure if you'd throw me to the wind and tell me don't come back again
If I could tell you what I wanted to say

If I could tell you what I wanted to say
No matter how much you hate yourself and me
If I could tell you what I wanted to say

But I never will no
I never will no
And I never do no
No I never will no

If I could tell you what I wanted to say
But I am much too afraid
Unsure if you'd throw me to the wind and tell me don't come back again
If I could tell you what I wanted to say

One only needs to gather thoughts when searching for something nice to say

Late last night
in a crumpled bed
all my courage gone
when my dreams all fled
you were on my mind
as if you were here
though I reached for you
you were nowhere near.

Rain upon my window,
rain within my heart
makes me weak to wonder
have we grown apart?
Will this coming morning
bring you back to me?
Or will a misty daylight
tell me: "You are free"?

Soft the rain is falling
as I think of you
sweet caressing outlines
of the one I knew.
Will you still remember?
In my heart you stole
bringing life and meaning
to my very soul.

Still, the words unspoken
but actions did approach,
commitments never given
with nothing to reproach
I turned and said my prayer
forgiveness in my heart
and wished you new beginnings
with love if we should part.

It must have been while thinking
that sleep at last won out
and sometime in these hours
I woke and looked about
the clouds had all departed
a sunrise morning's day
beside me you just whispered
"I'm here, my love, to stay."

J. Sandy