Those involuntary thoughts of hurting yourself,
to cut yourself,
to tear your body to pieces.
To cry without restraint.
To scream so hard your voice breaks.
To break into chunks of fat and mold,
colliding onto the floor.
To dissolve in the ocean,
To self-combust;
To be born again and whole.

Everything that comes up eventually comes down.
That's normal, isn't it. But 
I want to feel weightless.
I want to feel free and float around,
Move around by my own means.
Gliding around trees
and
gazing at the sky.
Instead of crumpled in my bed.
And stuck in my head.

left right white
black green red eye
nose even
odd foot hand dry
wet land sea

and all things hazy
blurred and shoved between