Xyns: Poems

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Xyns Oct 2014

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You are nothing
That I'd fight for
Why?
Because I already fought.
I did all I can do
So now I give up on you.

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Xyns Mar 2015

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If I could do it all over again
I'd choose *you

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Xyns Mar 2015

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"Nobody knows me
I'm cold.
Walk down this road
All alone.
It's no one's fault
But my own.
It's the path
I've chosen to go."

Space bound. Eminem.

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Xyns Apr 2015

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I want to be loved.
To be cherished

I don't want
To be thrown away
To be left damaged

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Xyns Dec 2016

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As free as a plastic bag in the wind
Plans subject to change
Vibes that can't go away

No worries, no frets
Finding, then blowing pineapple express
Fear of commitment led only to regrets

Each day, singular
Relationships, collateral
Each day, singular

Nothing to weigh you down
Even if you wish I was around
As free as a plastic bag in the wind

And that's why I keep giving in

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Xyns Oct 2014

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What if I told you I love you

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Xyns Apr 2014

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It's danger
So tempting

A stranger
Still willing

So open
Enclosing

So weak
Imposing

Just words
Life altering

Only letters
Heart-changing

Though scripted
Flow free

Never ending
Finally

#poem

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Xyns Oct 2015

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Why is it that I blame myself
When you don't text back?

Why is it that I blame myself
When its all out of my control?

Why is it it that I blame myself
When you're feeling down?

Why is it that I blame myself
When somebody else hurts you?

Why is it that I blame myself
When I'm obviously innocent?

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Xyns Jan 2015

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I miss when
The words were
Innocent.

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Xyns Mar 2014

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Your words are scarlet
Like the lips of a harlot

Your breath stings
Severing my wings

Your eyes are blazing
Leaving my soul dazing

Your pain and suffering
Has become my everything

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Xyns Jan 2015

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And she drowned herself in the music
So that she couldn't hear her thoughts

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Xyns Aug 2021

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An infinite well of effort
Something only dedicated to a select few

Refuse to exhaust myself
For anything lesser

No work to right a wrong
That doesn’t include myself

Never again will I cry
Over a loss of love

Relationships
Deserve no time and
No energy to mend

There’s no value found
In self pity
Or in the arms of men

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Xyns Nov 2014

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I feel like I'm drowning
But I'm on dry land

I'm gripping so tightly
But there's nothing in my hands

I'm sleeping sublimely
But I'm dreaming chaotic things

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Xyns Feb 2015

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"I'm supposed to be in love
But I'm numb again"

Rihanna

#whatnow

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Xyns Sep 2014

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No, I'm not ****
It's true, I'm not the coolest
But when it comes to love
I'll treat you the best

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Xyns Dec 2014

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I guess I'll never get to be confident.

I'll never be good enough.

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Xyns May 2014

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It feels like
the love and adoration
I have for you
is all that makes me feel anymore

#love

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Xyns Mar 2015

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Have you ever been so heartbroken
That you literally feel the pain in your chest?
That your heart actually aches?
That you feel like throwing up all the time?
That being alive just seems wrong?
Welp.
That's where I am right now..

And the saddest part is
He doesn't really seem to care

#tryingtofixit

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Xyns Oct 2014

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My best friend is in a different state
And that's something I just can't take
I'm feeling homesick, I miss that place
Not for family, not for the memories
But for her.
For the girl who's been the only consistency
That I've ever know.
The only person to whom I've shown myself
The real me that is known by no one else.
I'm homesick for her.

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Xyns Nov 2014

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Does this site have an app? If not, it needs one.

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Xyns Sep 2014

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Sometimes, I simply can't handle living.
But then he comes around.
And suddenly, it's all worth it.

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Xyns Mar 2014

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It's the evil that made me
The sins that shape me
This world is crazy
But, ya know, so are we

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Xyns Mar 2015

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It's not being sad
Or crying all the time

It's not being lonely
Or staying up at night

It's being numb
And feeling hollow

It's being empty
And drinking endlessly

It's grasping desperately
At what you used to be
And clinging to anything
That gets you through the day

It's depression.

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Xyns Mar 2014

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This life is like a fantasy
My own personal nightmare
I'll always plead insanity
I know that I can't stay here

Your love is like a drug
Making me feel amazing
Never fallen for a ****
I fell for who deserves me

Breathing is such work
My lungs are often stopping
My heart will randomly hurt
Sometimes it's barely beating

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Xyns Jan 2015

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"Today's a painful reminder
Of why it can only get brighter.."

Beautiful Pain. Eminem. Sia.

#thunderstorm

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Xyns Sep 2014

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The wind caressed me
As though it were a fervent lover

I turned, elated
Thinking you had returned

Only to find
That you still loved her.

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Xyns Jan 2015

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I liked How you said "Meh"
Because I say that too..

I liked how you said "Yus"
Because I say that too..

I liked how you used words..real words
Because I use them too..

I liked how you liked Red Dawn
Because I like it too..

I liked how you liked Lord of the Rings
Because I like it too..

I liked how you were atheist
Because I'm atheist too..

I liked everything you said
Because I was thinking it too..

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Xyns Dec 2014

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How can I be myself
When I don't know who I am?

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Xyns Sep 2017

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I'll invite you to occupy my mind
I'll do my best to never waste your time
As long as you promise not to waste mine

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Xyns Sep 2014

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I know that i'm getting darker and darker
And I know that no one can save me
But I'm gonna ask for help
Just this one last time

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Xyns Mar 2014

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Your smile is beautiful
Your skin is the smoothest
Your voice is calming
Your living makes me happy

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Xyns Jan 2015

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Maybe this is the caffeine talking
Or this is the overload on creatine

But I love you.
You mean the world to me.

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Xyns Mar 2014

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I get the shakes
I tremble
I get angry
I cry
I toss and turn
I fidget
I fight the urge
I fail

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Xyns Jan 2015

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Dear...
I don't know what I'm doing.
I don't know how to be happy.

Dear...
I'm sorry...
I'm sorry that you've fallen victim..

Dear..
You've fallen victim to my brokenness..

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Xyns Apr 2015

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I don't miss you

I miss the part of me
That you took when you left

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Xyns Apr 2015

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How the **** could you promise to give me everything..
And then take everything away from me?

And how the **** do I still love you?

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Xyns Mar 2014

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Come lay with me
Please, just stay with me
Lose yourself within me
I want to be your company

Dear, get lost with me
Fuel your lust with me
Lose all cares within me
I will never be your enemy

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Xyns Dec 2014

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So...he told me not to talk to you anymore..

But..as ******* as you make me..

I want to talk to you...even just as friends..

I need you..ya know..but I also want him..

Hell...I don't know what to do..

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Xyns Jun 2015

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You cross my mind way too much
Almost like what we had was true love
But I'm not fooling myself anymore
Love isn't real, it's fiction, folklore
I'm not kidding myself about it
I've put up with too much ****
I don't wanna argue, I don't wanna fight
But it seems that's all that happens in life
I wish I could run away from being alive
Just quit, go somewhere safe and hide

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Xyns Apr 2015

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I don't think I can give to you
The things you deserve
The things you need

I don't think I can ever be
Enough to make you happy
Enough to keep you pleased

I don't think I can say words
To express what I really mean
To describe what I'm thinking

I don't think I can do this.

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Xyns Oct 2014

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Society.
Sometimes it sickens me.

#society

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Xyns Jul 2017

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Who is she?
Who am I?
Sing me to death
Your love's my lullaby

Sunken cheeks
Blackened skies
She's out of breath
Her veins now hide

But who is she?
And who am I?
I suppose you noticed
I am she
And she is I.

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Xyns Dec 2014

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I made a mistake.

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Xyns Oct 2014

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It truly amazes me
That after so much

All the words you said
All the things you did
All the feelings you caused

That you can just stop
And you can just leave
And, to you,
I never meant a thing

.......................................................................................

It truly amazes me

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Xyns Nov 2014

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Confusion.
Lots of it.

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Xyns Jan 2015

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"Feels like a close is coming to.
The **** am I gonna do?
It's too late to start over.."

Guts Over Fear. Eminem

"Trip wires fill this house with tip toe love.."

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Xyns Mar 2017

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Oh, so fleeting were they
The years we spent together..

#love #heartbreak #life #friendship #****

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Xyns Dec 2014

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It feels like everyone's staring
But nobody sees me
Everyone sees the bad things
My messy hair
The sad clothes I wear

They're judging me
Based on shallow things
They don't care about the actual me
Just what I can't be
My beauty, they'll never see

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Xyns Sep 2014

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I want you and only you

I don't wanna leave you

Cuz I know for the rest of my whole life
I'm gonna need you

I'll need you to breathe

Like a breath of fresh air on a summer day

But I know that you've done gone
And you've strayed away

Why does it have to be so hard?

You've become my most important part

So I know if i should ever walk away
*I'll be leaving behind my heart

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Xyns Dec 2014

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I find it really extremely irritating when I'm just trying to write and read poetry and I get messages from someone trying to scam me out of money. If anyone tells you that they need to tell you something important but they need you to email them, It's all lies. They're trying to get you to send money. Just ignore the message altogether. I've already gotten two of them.