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So here i am
About to die
With a razor in my hand
"They wont understand"
"They wont even care"
i say to myself

So i finally slit my veins
And here i am,greeting death
I close my eyes
Hoping to be in a better place

I open my eyes
And i am in a place full of darkness
I try to scream for help
But no sound comes out
I never felt so scared

I pray to God to get me out of this place
I close my eyes
Hoping to be back in the world i knew
I open my eyes,
And i am still in this place

Now i will never get back my life
The life i lost forever
And now i am full of regret
Cause i am stuck in this place
Forever
All alone
In a place full of darkness
A poem I wrote ages ago,and just found it in my drafts.
It feels like a summer day,
But not the good kind

It’s warm outside,
And sunny, yes,
But also slow
...and dead

It’s the kind of summer’s blues
That I get towards the end
Of the break,
Before the next year of school starts

The kind
That I used to get
Before i got a job
Before, when i had nothing to do
At the end

It’s a nostalgia that i don’t like
Knowing that school is coming,
And wondering where the time went
After the good times
When my family was home
And weren’t tired
And neither was i

When i didn’t have to worry
At all
About my future,
About my friends,
About myself

I used to get bored of the freedom
That a three month break
Gave me

I got bored
Of doing…
Nothing

Something that i crave now

Drawing
Reading
Idly lying in the grass
And staring at the clouds

Wondering where the time has gone
A feeling I got over the weekend
I write what I see,
Because I am blind.
I write what I hear,
But I am deaf.
I write what I feel,
But paralyzed.
I write what I smell,
In my burnt nose.
I write what I taste,
The only sense left,
And thank the day,
Because it can be worse.
Secrets create,
Enemies and friends.
Can start new trends.
Reveal new tech.
Endanger peace.
Turn blue to red.
Secret whispers.

Secrets welcome.
Extra income.
Conditional love.
Regretful outcomes.
Emotional sin.
The hidden grin.
Secret whispers.

Secret sounds.
Entrapped inside.
Craves to be found.
Results in lies.
Eats till it dies,
Till realized.
Secret whispers, do not hide.
Am I just a wheel?
Consuming meals?
A speck in blue sea?
Bound by what I see?
Life amongst trees?
Breathing means free?

Am I my beliefs?
The truth I seek?
Flag of a country?
Defined by currency?
A liability?
Part of society?

Am I what you see?
The way you judge me?
The values you pick?
First impressions stick?
Norm defined by you?
Do I dare to be rude?

No...

I am who I choose.
I fill my own shoes.
I win when I lose.
I create my own views.
I see black beyond blue.
I pick me over you.

Who are we?
I am me.
Who are we?
Depends on you.
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