If I were lost
On a perpetual path
Navigating back and forth
With only a mad man's map
I would leave behind
A bread crumb trail
To help feed those
Still lost in hell
Then perhaps they'd find a way
Through this perpetual
Relentless maze
...

Dizzy eyes scan the surface
Spinning world, ringing ears
Bomb shell shattered
Unknown purpose
Her mouth moves
But I can't hear

There's no comfort
out here to bask in
Angels lie and
demons laughing
Evil sings when
the bringer brings
The blueprint of
a broken dream

Clearly she played
her game
And in the end
it's all the same
And in the end
it's all the same...

And these bottom lines
I so vaguely define
Full of missing spaces
Vanished in time
Perhaps too much of me
On these pages to bear
My ink pen desperately
Pleading for air
Still my heart
Revisits despair

And where is the empathy
You said was missing
After a cold hard look
At my dispositions
Shall we still pretend
That a heart can truly mend
I'd love to embrace
Such a beautiful end

For my falsehood
I'd surely atone
But these unfinished poems
Get written in Rome...

When I was but a foolish young lad
I trapped my demons down below
Creating spells of compromise
I let my holy spirits flow
I'm not here to free your mind
Of guide you through your maze
The only truth I have to share
Is I have simply lost my way
.........................


Just because we change our ways
doesn't mean the darkness fades.

First the rocks we were standing on
Became pebbles in our shoes
And with our leap of faith
Came a pile of mindless fools

It's time to redefine
The point in which
We've crossed the line...

In the absence of knowledge
Our ignorance takes the stage
One-sided points of view
Fear camouflaged by rage

I claim no label
No member or team
I gather my thoughts
From in between

As the furtherance of humanity
Spit sputters and pause
On the information highway
Let us further our cause...

There is no argument
The invisible
And the nonexistent
Are indeed identical
Yet against all reasonable logic
The majority of human kind
Cannot rise above superstition
It's such a peculiar condition
Those who won't decide
Have already made
Their decision

I have decided
To believe in
"Narnia"
I like the lion!
Yet intuitively
I think reincarnation
Is moderately likely.
....

I should change?

Change to fit
Your pleasure
Your passions
Your thrills?

Change my
Conversation
Design it
To fit
Your will??

Change my perception
Inorder to accept
Your draconian ways
Your attitudes
And instincts?
Your ideologies
Are a paradoxical maze

How about
In this
Rational mind state
I remain
Unchanged!

Who is actually legit
Who pretends to fits in
Have you challenged
The authorities
Have you given
Into sin
Have you stuck
To the high road
Proven to be a light
Bared the soul
Bled the fool
Have you given
All your might?

Have you hidden
The darkest part of you
Never mentioning wounds nor plight
Do you write behind
The eyes of shame
And shiver through your night
Do you wear a face
Of happy eye's
Taking comfort
Below your foolish pride  
Would it matter to you
If I were
The Devil in disguise
???

Seriously though
What would you do
If I were to extend
My compliments to you

Perhaps you’re pretty
Perhaps you’re smart
Perhaps you’re  the one
Who will steal my heart
Or even worse
You’re **** *** fine
Would these word ...cross
Your societal lines?
Especially
If you found me less
Than divine
Oh my
How these poetical words
Love to define
...

Numbness of reality
A meditative process
I rather not feel
All the sudden losses
The older I get
The clearer I see
The game is stacked
Exponentially

By the darkest night’s
Of our soul
We build these defenses
We are in accord
With a game of certain
Consequences

Good or bad
It’s a hell of a ride!
But if I can help it
I won’t let anybody die..

All these states of hell
Awaiting every path
Every step we take
Knives in our backs

Every dream that dies
Dust in changing winds
Every time you cry
Every time you bend

States of hell
No warning call
Before it rubs you raw
And no
It has nothing to do with sin!
It's merely a state of hell
   In the bitter end...

Are you human
In our eyes
What part of you
Refuse to die

Unquestioned morals
Of those who came before
Do you believe in invisible things
Do you believe in war

Are you worthy
In our heart of hearts
To speak of right
And wrong as an art

Is there room
For us to grow
Is there acceptance
In your role

Are you hungry
In the nights
Are we human
In your sight
???

Within the coming moons
While the universe parades
The stars which were once in line
Shall all become misplaced

Leading to the transfer
Of heart and soul to mind
The universe we know
Shall no longer leave us blind

The rapture of our being
Free to open wide
No more in between
No more other side

All the multiverses
Converging into one
All a sudden knowing
Where we all come from

Yet perhaps endless knowing
Is more than just a drag
And that's why over and over
We all keep coming back
.......

Embarrassing to admit
This time of year
Your cold memories
Control my gift...
Iced over thoughts
Of all I have lost
Along slippery ways
Back in your
Coldest day's...
February you are my curse's
Each time around
Seem's to get a little bit worse
Somewhere between
Christmas and spring
I tend to write
Really dark themes
February?
Of all the months
In a single year
How did you trap
My weary heart here?

It was clear as day
That look in her eyes
She surely found me attractive
But our values did collide

For her, materials mattered
A bit too much for me
My value system is tied
To a life of simplicity

So here I ask you poets
Do you really give a ****
About the name Ethan Allen
On your dresser or nightstand

Such high maintenance
Doesn't matter if you're rich
Still I am no longer driven
To scratch such an itch...

I could see there was nothing left
It was over between us
Yet I must have sat there for years
Staring at the broken pieces
Void of thought and motionless
Disassociation can be
A peaceful place...

While being transported
To a doctors appointment
I rode in the back of the van
Behind the fence
In hand cuffs and leg irons
Another day at work for the
The two prison guards up front
But for me, my first time seeing
Outside the prison walls
In over two years...
There was a feeling of longing
That ***** my mind
I begged them please
Leave me in the darkness
While I do my time
.....

The sun no longer
Makes me cry
I refuse to love a lie

I can't express
A color scheme
Wordless thoughts
Are all I see

In poetic tongue
My emotions confess
Beautiful words
When I'm a mess

I can't describe
A moonlit night
A star filled sky
I'm not that bright

But
When my feelings overflow
About to burst
About to blow
I run to my pen
To save my soul!

The sun no longer
Makes me cry
I refuse to love a lie
...................................

The detachment is necessary
In refusal of pain I rest
I cleverly disassociate
From everybody’s death’s

Don’t look for me at funerals
I’ve no need for grim reaper’s grief
I’ll stay out here in the forest
And I’ll remain forever green!

Quite astounding
Actually
Behind eyes
Beyond perception
The seeds of darkness
Flourish

Nurtured in
Regrettable
Resentful
Irreversible
Fates

Sometimes it's hard
To see in the dark...

Mere shadow
   Of a lost soul...

Starving for truths
That can never be known

I was once lost you know?
Separate from us
Always to and fro

But without us
You're on your own

A mere shadow
   Of a lost soul...

The causation
Of war
Is a world view
Implicitly drived
From a commonality
  Of righteousness...

Yet in the event
Of such realization
Of our oversight
And in that moment
When we happen to
Think twice

Any way we
Contemplate war
Death and suffering
Will always want more
..................................

Who can be classified as a Troll
Is there a criteria that lets us know
If we were a Troll ourselves
Would that affect our mental health

Under the bridge of a poetic mind
Surely the Troll will strike in due time

To show us our ways
Have somehow gone south
Straight out of lines
They'll run their big mouths

And so here I'll simply define
A Troll is a person who crosses the line
A questionable comment without a like
Are you trying to be irritably polite
....
Sorry someone needed to say it!

Listen to all the unrest
What if they all knew
The universe
Is trying to talk us through

You better learn to listen
And expand your beliefs
There’s no rest for the wicked
And
Religions can be a thief

Suffer and slumber
Or wake up and fly
There’s much more
Than flesh on the line!

We pay our debts
Sometimes
Empty-handed
We walk a fine line
Nothing is the way
It’s supposed to be
I still love her
She don’t love me.

The world ran me down
Then ran me over
How can I mend
I just can’t stay sober…

It felt like May
A cool spring day
I tried to stay
It drug me away…

Great is the loss
Endless the cost
Clear as the sky
Lost alibi...

The witness just stares
There’s blood in the air
To the victim's despair
Nobody seems to care…

Now love makes her sad
And she don’t trust her dad
The world ran her over
She may never be sober…

As my Sundays
Begin to unfold
Coffee, poetry
And away I go
Just like tomorrow
And the days before
Got to get myself
Into that zone

Moments between
The struggles of life
Balancing friends
Family and wifes
Work and fun go
Hand in hand
I am but
A Poetry Man

We have always been and we will always be….
So if I can’t leave my mark upon the world this time..…
Next time around
will be good enough for me.

Dear Betrayal
You’ve always been near
You limited loving
Intimidator...

You lured me in
Your deceitful web
Moths of time
Dried up dread

I don’t take it personally
The action of wrong
I never assumed
You meant to stay long

The waters shall wash
And so soon we shall see
The truths that uphold
Our inventories

Dear Betrayal
I forgive you
I wish you the best
And so I shall sleep on
Straight through your mess!

Blood red are the dreams of the poet
Unable to run from the impending doom
He felt to scream but could only whisper
In a sea of despair he’s been consumed

I LEARNED TO RUN WHEN I WAS YOUNG
FROM A WORLD OF EVIL, AND THEN SOME
THROUGH WICKED SKIES THAT STAINED THE NIGHT'S
I TORE THE FABRIC TO PEEP THE SIGHT

GATHERING SHADOWS WATCHING ME BLEED
FLASHES OF PHANTOMS WHO LONG TO FEED
WITHIN THOSE NIGHTS MY SIGHT WAS FORMED
WITHIN THOSE NIGHTS MY HEART WAS TORN

Worthless words
In wasted ink
Nowhere thoughts
Are all I think

Shall I map
This living mess
From death to birth
To cursed from blessed

Shall I write of love
Slipped through my hands
With every word
This heartbeat ******

To relive the past
In a flowery array
What worthless words
Would I convey ...

Across the divides
Her single arrives
A cast of eyes receive

Off to the race
Her words of good taste
Such good lovin'
When she bleeds

A trend every time
She posts on line
Tragically a mess

But it's her that I need
To set my soul free
So go ahead my love
   And confess...

Back when I
Was still with you
Roses were ripened
Violets were skewed
All of our love'n
Laced in lewd
Oh the things
We use to do
Acts of madness
Unnaturally crude
*******, tied down
Blindfolded moods
Lustful passions
Lacking rules
Psychedelic
Absolutes
Back before we
Became improved
....

I can’t bear to live a lie, but I do
Hidden from sight the what, where, when and who
There once was a bogeyman under the bed
Sin was his deal, his desires were met
But he's okay now
'Cause that part is dead

Lies can defend against purposeful blame
When people who know catch wind of the same
One day they're here the next day they're gone
With such wind at ones back I could hardly stay long

The waves of uneasiness
Trouble the shores
Deep in the night
The tides still roar

Unmovable past
Refuses to bend
Emotional fractures
Crawl back in

Chills, sweats
Fever dreams
Are the cost of war
At love's defeat

Carried on
The wayward soul
All the loving
We've ever known!


.....

Stop on by tonight we’re going to talk about the Bible and have some red wine.
Okay, we don’t have to talk.
A drink of Jesus will be just fine!

I observe reality
Then I realize
My attention gets
Fragmented
Then
Paralyzed
From the implicit
Yet more then obvious
Genocide

World News
Stations
CNN
Clever Fox
Propaganda
Hides a lot
They back the burglars
Celebrate the thief’s
Manufacture consent
Without relief
Without regret
Same as MSNBC
Not a single moral left!

In the meantime
I'll slow my roll
Taking these chances
Is getting real old

In the meantime
I'll celebrate life
Bury the ax
Hell I might even
Forgive my ex-wife

In the meantime
I'll sit in the sun
Cop me some rays
And have me some fun

In the meantime
I'll tell you the same
Do you some living
'Cause that's why we came

Oh sea of madness
Oh ocean of fools
This water between us
Is but a drowning-pool

Tomorrows is out of focus
In the dimness of foresight
Sticks and stones in pockets
This involuntary fight

No shelter from the tempest
The storms that never end
Just a longing to return
To embrace your love again....

Summer hair blowing in the breeze
My heart gets tangled when she's running free
The reflection of fireworks displayed in her eyes
Bursts then burns out, still she remains untied
Satisfaction is a smoking gun
Still she belongs to no one...

Silhouette of a cheerleader as she greets an old friend
As if he's more welcome than I am
Yet I know it's my hand she holds
'Til she meets the true mate of her soul
How heavy she weighs on my poem
Still after the breeze she roams....

Time stands still when dark days fall
I call to the gray sky, the clouds muffle my call
Come fill my cup with passion and precision
  Overflow me with magic from the old religion...

Take now this burden which weighs on my heart
This universe is one which makes us whole parts
Remove this illusion that we lack the power
To manipulate existence each moment devoured...

My spirit has been trapped, now dare to release
The will of the gods for those who believe
So grant me the power to change this tide
And remove this darkness from these tired eyes...

Doubt becomes apparent to the intellect
Time becomes linear mingled with despair
A mathematical description of our universe
Such a lack of comfort for anyone to bear...

No silver lining in the purity of knowledge
No true magic in the music of the spheres
No supernatural state awaits our arrival
There's no perfect day without you here...

The more I search the deeper my groan
There's no turning away from the light that's shone
The wider the span the less my life means
I feel as if I awoke from a beautiful dream...

In order to touch you
I can only use words
.....

Truth cannot merely
Be spoken into existence
Without the equation
Of a believer multiplied
Ten times by foolish pride
Which potentially adds up to
A blurry distant shadow
In the darkness of one's mind...

In an attempt
To form a confession
While lacking
Poetic expression
I put a tongue lashing
On my muse
Using words seldom abused
This and thats
With words that snap back
Now I'm really trapped
Not to mention confused
In this bottomless pit
Forcing words  
Without a muse
...

Free from childhood
That no longer exist
Living in the moment
Becomes our gift

Let not the blemished proof of our youth
Hides our secret truths
Allow them to be merely dimples
In your smiles!

The deep shall
Always go deeper
All the way down
Without a trace...

Spirit attempts to wax brighter
In a symphony of perpetual grace

Love does not extinguish it's own flame
That's the ego playing it's foolish games

A Poet don't complain
Nor bear a bitter heart
The gift of acceptance
Is discovered in our art

So take some deep breaths
And think about thinking
Get beyond the past
And you will quit sinking!

The past no longer exist
The future will never be here
We will always be in this moment

Looking back
Is a part of mind
It's a part of living
As our lives unwind

No love forgotten
No heart un-broke
Life goes on
No
You're not a ghost
.......