11 p.m.
It's time to go to bed
With weird thoughts in my head.
Maybe dreams will be better.

12 a.m.
Midnight has come.
I can't feel, I'm numb.
When will sleep fall on my eyes?

1 a.m.
It's already too late
For me to still be awake.
Yet I can't fall asleep because of you.

2 a.m.
Oh, here they come.
I've been waiting them for long.
Bad thoughts are back.

3 a.m.
Everything is peaceful
But my heart and my lungs.
Anxiety, why won't you go away?

4 a.m.
Dawn is here, and I'm still awake.
Everything is calm, my heart doesn't ache.
It's too late to fall asleep now.

5 a.m.
I breathe in cold, fresh air,
Everything around me seems so fair.
New day, new chance. I'm glad to be alive.

Dark, gloomy thoughts cloud my mind again,
Filling my entire head with clouds thicker than cigarette smoke.

Scary, frightening thoughts fill my brain again,
I wish that this morning I never really woke.

I just want control
Over my mind
Over my thoughts
Over my actions
Over my choices

But I will never get that control...

I just need to make peace with it.